Help needed with 10.5 month old 2nd nap

[Joy-filled]

Also, one thing that might be confusing you is the whole OTness thing.  It is soooooo hard when they are OT and you feel like you just don't know how to help them!  Hang in there, you will both make it through this.  While your DD is definitely OT the confusing thing is that she can both be OT and UT at the same time.  She can have a build of OT from sleep deprivation over the last few days/weeks/whatever but UT in the short term.  When you PD too soon after she has woken up she is not tired enough in that moment to fall asleep, even though she has a build of OT in her body.  Then, because you PD UT she doesn't fall asleep and it just keeps the OTness going.  Does that make sense?

Also, you could do set naps if you wanted to but from what I've heard that's guaranteed to give you some OTness in the beginning until she gets used to it.  It also tends to work better for angel/textbook babies than touch/spirited ones.  As my DS is a touchy/spirited sleeper set naps were not a good idea for him so I don't have any experience on that front.  Perhaps someone else could speak to that?

[pareeta]

Thanks so much Char K!  This really helps clear things up.  I'm definitely going to follow this starting tomorrow morning.  Today I ended up rocking her for both naps to maximize her sleep.  She woke up from her last nap at 2:35 and PD at 6pm for the night, but she didn't end up going to sleep until 7:45.  Do I need for A time after her last nap? 

[pareeta]

DD woke up at, i think, at 6:45.  I only heard at 6:53 so i'm assuming she woke up around 6:45.  I just put her down at 10.  I'm keeping my fingers crossed!

[Joy-filled]

I hope it goes well!  As to your question about A time before BT it depends on how long the pm nap was and what her awake time was for the day.  If she's an average sleep needs baby,you're aiming for 14 hrs total sleep in 24 so you'd aim for 10 hrs awake time in the day.  So, if you are still hoping to do the 45 min capped am nap and uncapped pm nap, and you had her sleeping at 10:00 today then the day might look like this:

WU 6:45
A 3 hr 15 min
S 10:00-10:45 (wake her up)
A 3 hr
S 1:45-?  (uncapped, but hoping for 1.5-2 hrs).  Let's just say it was 1.5 hr and she slept until 3:15
A 3 hr 45 min
BT 7:00

If she naps less than that in the pm she may need a shorter A time to BT in order to not be OT.  It will take a bit for you to sort you what her A time needs are, though.  She very well may need more A time in the am or pm in order for you to get a long pm nap.  You have to stick to something for a few days before you know if it's working or not and if it doesn't work, you have to be patient as you try to figure it out.  Things sound like they've been pretty all over the place for you and your DD so it isn't clear what her A time needs are and it's going to take some trial and error to figure that out.  Does that make sense?

That way she'd have 10 hrs of total awake time in the day.

[pareeta]

Thanks, Char!  She fell asleep at 10:05!  I was a little late in waking her since i'm at my sisters.  I woke her up at 11:05.  I'll give her A time for 3 hours and then will put her down.  Again thank you so much Char.  All of this info really helps. 

[pareeta]

Just put her down for her 2pm nap. Keeping my fingers crossed again!

[pareeta]

DD didn't take her afternoon nap.  Here's here schedule so far:

6:45 - Awake
10:00 - PD in crib
10:05 - Alseep
11:05 - Awake (woke her up)
2:00 - in crib NO NAP
3:15 - take out of crib

I'll put her down for the night at 5:45

I will make sure i wake her up tomorrow at the 45 min mark from her morning nap and see how it goes.   I will try this for a few days like you suggested Char.

[Joy-filled]

That is so tough, Pareeta!  It's awful when they refuse a nap.  I would definitely cap her nap at 45 min tomorrow but TBH I'm pretty sure you're going to have to cap it more than that in order for her to take her pm nap.  She really seems like she's communicating she needs more A time to me.  But I'm definitely no expert.  I've learned a couple of things along the way with my one very touchy/spirited sleeper (he's angel/textbook in every other way) but I'm definitely not an expert and I'm still in the thick of the struggles myself.  Hopefully one of the moderators can pop onto your thread to help you out as they have far more knowledge and experience than me!

[Layla]

Yes, even 1 hr can be too much  so try 45 mins and around 3-3.5 hrs later try for pm nap. You're doing great...we had to experiment with A times for a while before we found what suited us...

[pareeta]

Thanks Layla and Char.  She was asleep by 6:05pm last night and EW of 5am.  I just put her down at 9am since I kept her in the crib until 7am.  I'll wake her up at 9:45, and hope for  the best this afternoon.  Wish me luck!

Char - I believe I have a text book baby in every other way except sleep. She loves to sleep but she has a hard time falling asleep.  It's always taken up to an hour, and she's a very light sleeper. 

[Layla]

9 am is good and aim for pm nap around 1ish...its ok that she woke early...EW are to be expected during the transition. She had 11 hrs overnight and hopefully she will have a decent pm nap and bedtime can be at a decent time.

Fingers crossed :-)

[pareeta]

I woke her up at the 45 min mark from the AM nap.  Now hoping she falls asleep for the 1pm nap.  Currently, she's rolling around and standing up.  Little booger!

[pareeta]

Success!!!  I put her down at 1pm and she fell asleep at 1:40.  She slept for two hours!!!!!  In regards to her taking 40 min to fall asleep, does she need more A time before her afternoon nap?  What time should i put her down?  6:45?

Here's her schedule:
5:00 - Awake
7:00 - Get out of crib
9:00 - In crib/asleep
9:45 - woke her up
1:00 - in crib
1:40 - asleep
3:41 - awake

6:45  - I will put her down for the night


Thanks so much for all of your help!!!!  It's been 2 months since she's had decent naps!!!!

[Joy-filled]

Yay for fabulous naps!  It sounds like she either needs less A time after the 1st nap or for you to cap the am nap more but I'd test out your current plan a couple days more before making any changes.  You really can't know for sure until you've tried something for at least 3 days, I think.

I could be wrong but I'm pretty sure after a 2 hr nap she'll need more than 3 hr A time to go down for BT.  She may not be ready at 6:45.  I know that makes for a long day as she technically woke up at 5:00.  But if it was me I probably would PD at 7:00 at the earliest, but that's just my opinion.  Anyone else?

[pareeta]

Thanks, Char.  I put her down at 6:51 as i only saw your post after.  I think it was too early since it took her an hour to fall asleep.  Tomorrow is another day!