Been doing EASY for nearly 4 weeks, almost no results, about to give up--HELP!?

[benandjen]

Hi all, I'm new here. I have read Tracy's book cover to cover almost three times and visited the forums daily. I have a 7 week old baby who is not sleeping during the day consistently at all--perhaps I'm expecting too much, but I am starting to tire of the constant shh/pat without seeing results and feel like giving up and letting him CIO---I won't, he's too little, and I really can't stand the thought of it---but I guess I'm baffled as to when I will start to see results and if there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Having to hold him all the time is exhausting. Here are the basics:

1. Feeding is 3 hours--seems to be great for DS
2. Activity minimal as he does seem to get OT easily
3. Needs to fall asleep in arms, has never really "put self to sleep"
4. After first waking in the night he's up every 30 mins-60 mins
5. Napping during day a huge struggle--10 to 40 min naps only and if not held, screams
6. I am not going to be a prisoner in my own house so occasionally we DO go out to store, hike/walk and he sleeps in carrier every time

Here's our routine:

6 am E
6:30 am A-tummy time, some hygiene, put into new clothes, etc.
7 am S (takes up to 40 mins to settle, seems to get OT by then)

9 am E
9:30 am brief A
9:45/10 am S (Sometimes this nap is good???)

12 pm E
12:30 pm brief A
1 pm try to put back down

3 pm E
3:30 pm brief A
4 pm S (tough to get this catnap in before first cluster)

5 pm E--cluster feed
5:30 pm bath

7 pm E--cluster feed
8 pm--S usually settles pretty well at this hour

10:30 pm DF

Wakes at either 130, 3, or 4 (on a great night!) and then after initial waking, up every 30 to 40 for burp, gassiness, give him the pacifier, etc until 6 am

Can anyone give me any advice? thank you in advance!!

[jessmum46]

Hi there and welcome to the BW forums

First of all (((hugs))), the early days are so exhausting and it can feel like nothing you do is right.  Sleep deprivation makes everything seem worse too - we've all been there and can tell you it does improve, but I know how hard it can be.

My first thought reading your post is whether LO could in fact have reflux?  Have a look here and see if anything rings a bell: Reflux 101 - General reflux information. Super short naps, extreme difficulty settling and frequent wakes at night (particularly post-feed) can all be symptoms even if LO never really regurgitates milk - 'silent reflux'.  Sleep training won't be effective if your LO is in pain/discomfort so it might be worth discussing with your GP.  The other thing could be oversupply/over active letdown if you are breastfeeding?

I presume you are feeding at the first night waking?

Overall though I just want to say take it easy on yourself . Your LO is still so tiny, and while some LOs will naturally and easily fall into a predictable routine, by far the majority at this age won't.  You are already doing EASY because your LO is having a feed, then some A time, then a sleep.  Independent sleep can be worked on over time - at 7 weeks I would expect that almost all LOs would still need some help to fall asleep at least some of the time.  Around 3-4 months is often a much easier time to sleep train where you will see quicker results, so if you're finding it all a bit too much at the moment why not just enjoy those cuddles and carrier naps, get out and about and enjoy being a new mum for now, and worry about the independent sleep a bit later on?

If it makes you feel better, I didn't even discover EASY until closer to 4-5 months and have had a very independent sleeper from then on with very little effort x

 

[benandjen]

Hi! Was so relieved to see your response. Thank you for the encouragement and information. I left out a key point that ds actually DOES have reflux and is on a twice daily dose of Zantac. It seems to have helped as he's actually less fussy than he was weeks three to five. I'm glad to hear that all of this might be more effective in the future and I can maybe try to relax a bit more. Your right in that the sleep deprivation is remarkably difficult and I'm struggling with it right now! I appreciate your help!

[jessmum46]

good guess then!

Refluxers are often much harder to settle into a routine early on and there is a specific board here Colic, Reflux, & Crying where you will get some great help from other mums who are or have been in your situation.

I would think about going to the GP again though - what you've described makes me think that perhaps his reflux isn't fully controlled yet even if it is a bit better than it was.  Often LOs need to be on a bigger dose of meds or have an extra one added in to get full control.  Just a thought

[benandjen]

Katherine
I was thinking the same. He is spitting up one and two hours after feedings. I was up every hour with him to help him burp/spit last night starting at midnight. It was brutal.

[jessmum46]

Ugh ((hugs)), definitely time for another trip to the docs.  I hope it goes well x