18mth old regression. HELP needed urgently!!! Please xx

[4 under 5]

Even if it take 6 hours to calm her down? That's mental torture. No matter what dh try's to tell her she won't calm down until he takes her down stairs. Then the crying continues. She really is very strong headed. Never seen a child not back down after an hour or two but she can go on and on.

[HenaV]

I agree with Shiv hon - I know it must be tough, but it is just what you are used to. Taking her downstairs just gives her mixed messages/creates a new habit to break.

When R went through the 18SR it was hell. Admittedly I didn't have a new born but just managibg the hours of screamingm sleep refusal and temper was soul destroying. The only thing that got R and I through that was maintaining consistency. So, with DH taking over, let him handle her. Keep her where it is she sleeps. I promise you and DH will prevail - she will soon get the message that this is how it is to be and you will come through this, all of you. To go in to settle her for DH just gives her the message if she screams loud enough.... And then what if she does it in the night - how will you manage then hon between looking after your NB, settling her and getting no rest.

I know it's hard hon, but please hang in there. I hope that you get on ok at the docs

H x

[4 under 5]

Thank you. I know your both right. Brings me to tears reading it.  poor little girl. Ill see what the doctor says and report back. Thanks I really appreciate your help. Xx

[HenaV]

big big (((hugs))) to you all xxxx

[4 under 5]

Thanks. She went for a nap at 11.30 am and awake at one. Should I let her have another nap before bed?

[HenaV]

Either that or bed at 6pm?

[Shiv52]

Hugs xx

I know it's easy for us to say and I know how hard it is. I totally appreciate it's much harder to do than say!

My friends LO was unbelievably stubborn.  She screamed 4/5 hours plus the first few nights then it just clicked. If you rescue it will make it harder in the long term. Honestly I would just stay in the room. Try and think the goal is to get her back to sleep, not so much to just calm her down. Makes the process easier so your DH isn't trying tonnes of tricks to calm her down. I'd just be very sympathetic. 'Its ok baby daddy is here, it's just sleep time, we'll see mummy in the morning'.

Hugs xx

[Shiv52]

Meant to ask does she go to sleep independently at nap and bedtime?

[4 under 5]

Thanks girls. Her bed was 7pm tonight as we had lot on this evening. She wasn't long going to sleep.
For her daytime nap and going to bed at night I've always lay beside th cot and held her hand. Disaster I know. We used to sleep together for daytime naps sometimes when I was pregnant because I was so tired. How silly I was doing this :-(

She was at the doctor. Her ear was a tiny bit red so she gave her an antibiotic anyway.

[Shiv52]

I think that is part of your issue really. If she doesn't know how to go to sleep she doesn't know how to get back to sleep in the middle of the night. Does she accept DH putting her to bed ?

[HenaV]

Hey,

Just checking in. How did last night go? X

[4 under 5]

Shiv maybe. She won't let him put her to bed.

Don't want to jinx myself but she slept from 7pm untill 7.30 this morning!!!! In her own cot with only a few little whimpers. I'm delighted today. Could this be the end of it? Xx

[Shiv52]

Wow! That's great.

I'd just keep as you are with DH resettling. You maybe do want luck talk to DH about him putting her to bed or starting to be part of the routine. She would accept him more readily in the night if she sees him as part of her sleep routine xx

[4 under 5]

Yes shiv. I'm afraid I don't feel ready to do that yet. She's been through enough. Maybe when this all settles we can think about that. It's me holding back but I can't help it

[Shiv52]

Oh no pressure at all. You have to do it when you're ready. It's just if she keeps having really bad nights it may be something that would help that along.  Hope you get a good night tonight x