tweak needed for routine for 27mth old-nap or bt?... go cold turkey 1-0?

[mycatmonet]

Dd is 27mths. Sttn but is generally up from 5.30am. Stays in bed until 6-6.30am usually before getting cranky and I get her up. Bt is 7pm but she can take an hour to go to sleep most nights, happy chatting in her cot... Still has a nap 1-2hrs uncapped normally around 12.30pm, earlier if tired. On the odd nnd she goes to sleep fast at bt, or ebt. But her mood is often a bit cranky in the afternoon on nnd. Soooo is this a cap the nap situation (though think she would be cranky about that) or tweak nap timing? I think bt is ok at 7, but something is off maybe.
Any thoughts?

[HenaV]

Hi!

That's a long old day on no nap. R is 31m old and if she doesn't nap then it's a 5.45/6pm BT. You may find that the long day is perpetuating the ew because of ot. Equally, we did go through a glitch period atbthis age dogged with either ew or long NW - developmental issues. Is this routine a longstanding thing?

So your day looks like this does it?

WU: 5.30
Up:6/6.30
Nap:12.30 ( up to 2h)
BT: 7pm

[mycatmonet]

Yep! Wu not always 5.30 but can be closer to 6.
It's been like this for ages. Sometimes we do ebt based on her mood but generally it is a 7pm bt. I think she is pretty lsn, nights were always 10-10.5hrs max. The 2hr naps are less frequent now, and the 70-min naps more common.

[HenaV]

So her day isn't necessarily taking away from her night from what you describe? In that case, if you did a 6.30 BT ie 13h day, how do you think she'd respond? I'm wondering whether the hour to get to sleep I in fact because she's OT/OS because of the nap lenght versus lenght of day yk?

H

[mycatmonet]

Thanks Hena!! Yeah could be! I might try ebt tonight, wu was closer to 5am today. She has a bit of a cold and was coughing. Dyt the time for the nap is ok still?

[HenaV]

At this age I would be working for a nap closer to 1.30 but with a WU of 5.30
That might be a push and make the OT worse - it's already a 7h morning which on a 10h night IMO might be a push?

I think you should go with 13h day for a week and see if that makes a difference. If that makes no difference, I perhaps would consider doing something with the nap. What do you think?

H

[mycatmonet]

DD refused the nap again today with a emphatic 'no!'.. so pd tonight at 6pm. Last night didn't manage ebt...and not sure when wu was today, though it was before 6, think I heard her at 5.40am.
So! I get to watch the 6pm news for the first time in a million years tonight.

[mycatmonet]

Okkkk. Dd is now refusing to nap at home. She will nap at my mother's place as mum does pd when dd is asleep... a carry over from when dd was 12mths and I went back to work. Anyway... dyt we should just go cold turkey with naps and drop them and have 6pm set bt? Mum gave dd acapped 1hr nap yesterday and then bt was later and dd didn't go to sleep for ages and wu was 5.20am today.
I think if mum gave dd a choice about the nap she'd refuse, and only naps cos mum rocks her to sleep. Maybe it would be better to go cold turkey on naps and go an earlier bt to try get a longer night. For consistency? Thoughts?

[HenaV]

Personally at 27m i wouldn't - I know my dd wouldn't cope in the long term. There is a crazy developmental phase that occurs around this age that for us and many others manifested itself in sleep shenanigans. For us it was NW, followed by nap and then BT refusal. The answer for us was to persist with R's routine and ride it out - which incidentally worked. Admittedly all through riding it out I drive myself and everyone here nuts trying to 'figure it out'. As it turns out, there was nothing to fix/ figure out, just something to get through.

So what to do? Pd for nap at the normal time, Wi/WO as necessary, insist and persist. You will no doubt get short or NND, in which case EBT. If you get a nap that's a decent one, stick to normal BT. Easier said than
Done I know but I say it because I have done it. It is painful, frustrating and knackering, but the positives I hear you ask, when it's all over, your LO will slip back into the  routine you have maintained through this craziness!!!

Does that help? X

[mycatmonet]

Yes! Thanks lovely! Shall try for naps everyday at least. Should my mum not cap, and let her sleep as long as she wants, and we keep the 7pm bt? Or is 7pm too late anyway? Think we started that when dd took ages to go to sleep with an earlier bt, but maybe it is too late and is causing ot since she takes ages to drop off at 7 now. Wu was 5.45-6.30ish previously, now it is rarely after 6.

Oh wow a developmental stage, that might explain the few nw she has had too recently. I only had to go in to her once, but she wouldn't let me leave!!

[HenaV]

Sounds like you're in the middle of the craziness hon. R was the same with NW - wouldn't let me leave. I had to work out when she needed me and when she was just being a monkey yk and deal with it accordingly.

I would keep trying with the naps. If she really tired then maybe let your mum let her sleep as long as she wants and adjust BT accordingly. If there's no nap tend to go for a 6pm BT

Hth x

[mycatmonet]

ugh bt was a nightmare tonight! Fx tomorrow is better. Then I have my 2 los for the weekend while dh works... first time home alone with both of them and dd likely not to nap!

[HenaV]

Big (((hugs))) hon. Here to hold your hand. I'll try and check in as much as possible, especially over the weekend xxx

[mycatmonet]

Another 5.15 wu after falling asleep 7.50ish. Sigh!

[jenn1975]

Hi there! Ill give you our experience with this at that age, which was only just a couple of months ago....

Hena can vouch for me, she helped me the whole time! And other moms on here too!

Our son went through a never ending 3 month long crazy sleep thing at that age. I wanted to drop his nap every single day, and we even did for 4 straight days! He wasn't ready. Or maybe I just wasn't. We didn't deal with EW but we had short naps, and short nights, and taking ages and ages to fall asleep at BT. We also had nws too. He was night potty training then too which contributed to the nws.

Our son is also on the lower end of sleep needs. So, in the end, and still now, 2-3 months after the craziness, we ended up with a total shift in his schedule. Later nap, and later BT. This was a kid that for his whole short life had been asleep BY 8 pm, no later. Well, now.... Not anymore. His nap is now at 2pm and his BT is 8:30-8:45(put down at that time), asleep between 9-9:30.

I realized that if I wanted to keep his nap, I had to accept the later times. So for now, we ate leaving it be, even though the BT is an hour later than I would like. Also, we throw in a no nap day in here and there, which gets a longer nap and longer night for a couple of days.

So, I believe that each child is different and requires different amounts of sleep, and some, though maybe not most, are really beginning to move near dropping the nap at this age.

I don't think I'd drop it totally. I'd start by moving the nap a few min for a few days. See if that works to get a better nap and maybe a later morning WU. We also had SA and fears at night and we just have lots of extra comfort in his room but didn't take him into our room.

So, now we have about 10-10.5 hour nights, sometimes 11. And an hour to hour and a half nap. Mostly 11.5 total hours of sleep in 24.

For us I think some was developmental, but some was moving closer to losing the nap, hence the shift in later times. Good luck! You'll find what works.