easy 3 month- schedule updating

[Alisa masik]

hello
we r trying the past week to do the easy schedular starting from 7 am when the baby is up. every 1:20-30 going to sleep. it was the plan ' during wich he has short naps- sometimes 20 min sometimes 40 ' almost never any longer even when i m trying get him back to sleep- it doesnt work.
today he woke up at 6 am, no luck in getting back  to sleep so we eat'play and at 8 put him down. he slept very poorly- around 30 min. again- tried to shhh and pat- nothing.  eat again and playing.
now when should i put him down? still  1.30 since he woke? at 10?  or should i wait till 11:30  like every day on the schedule?
i dont see any result to the easy system except we r both angry and tired.
now he plays but very tired so what should i do? how do i move the schedule ?   wht is more important : the same hours every day that he goes to nap? or the 1-20 in between the nap and no matter what is the hour ?
thank u

[jessmum46]

Hi Alisa, sorry you've been having trouble getting started with EASY.  Have you read the secrets of the baby whisperer book?  It's a really good place to start understanding the philosophy behind the EASY routine, and this link is also pretty useful: Starting EASY - all you need to know and more!

The most important thing to understand is that it is not designed to be a schedule, by which I mean it is not based on following the clock and having the exact same things happening at the same times each day.  Rather it is based around having a predictable sequence of events - eat, activity, sleep - and responding to your LOs cues.  So if LO is tired, they need a sleep even if the routine expects they would stay awake a bit longer.  Each baby is individual and won't follow a schedule in a book 'just because'.

What I would focus on at this age (and bear in mind your LO is still very young, many babies have nothing like a predictable routine at this age) is eating when LO wakes, having some activity time and then keeping in mind an age-appropriate A time but also looking out for cues for when LO is ready for a sleep.  If you get a short nap, try not to worry and don't drive yourself mad trying to resettle forever.  If LO doesn't resettle just get LO up and move on, feed when the next feed is due and be prepared that LO might be ready for a sleep sooner than usual.  It's common for the day to look like EASAEAS in the early months.

Most of all don't put too much pressure on yourself or LO to fit the ideal routine.  You need to enjoy this special time - LO will only be this tiny for a very short time

[Alisa masik]

Thank u so much for the kind words.   I have read the book that's why we started with the easy at the first place.  But maybe I didn't fully understand the schedule retual.  Cause I realize it's really a matter of minutes when the lo goes to sleep,cause then he will get used to the routine and will go to sleep without objection to the all proses . But now I understand it is more important the time in between the naps: 1:20 hour, right ? Doesn't matter when he woke up in the morning at the first place. 
If he sleeps only 40 min.  Should I increase my next A time? Although after 1:20 he seems very restless and cranky, cry sometimes : I read that as tired, but maybe something else,??   By how long should I increase the A time.  ?
He will be 4 months in a week from now.  Should I then go to the 4 hours Easy ? Or continue a bit with the 3 so he will get used to it?
Thank u!

[jessmum46]

If he is nearly four months 1h20 might not be enough.  Have a look here at average A times: Average A times- BOOKMARK ME!!

What I would suggest is to pick an A time, say 1h30 and stick to it for at least 3-4 days.  That's the only way you'll be able to see patterns emerging and see what sort of A time your LO actually needs.  He is likely to be somewhere between a 3 and 4h EASY but you could start with a 3h EASY and see how it goes for a few days.  If you keep a record of what actually happens and post it here after a couple of days, hopefully it can help you make a few adjustments