Author Topic: 8.5 month twins, night waking and early morning waking,  (Read 18343 times)

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Offline Uglybethy

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Re: 8.5 month twins, night waking and early morning waking,
« Reply #90 on: April 29, 2014, 18:46:02 pm »
What was their total day time sleep in the end? I know with one of mine if she's under tired she's not happy in her crib but the other one is ok...

Offline 4isstillnighttime

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Re: 8.5 month twins, night waking and early morning waking,
« Reply #91 on: April 29, 2014, 19:17:44 pm »
About 2.5 hours....but I think they are very tired from last night, have been grumpy and clingy all day. And woke up grumpy from the pm nap. In a really good mood at bedtime though and went to sleep initially without a peep.

Maybe it's because with ST I've always concentrated on first going to sleep, and have done what it takes to get them back to sleep at night wakings. My husband is doing the first shift and if she cries will go to her, put a hand on her back so she knows he's there, hand a dummy into her hand then sit by the cot and say the sleepy words til she goes down. Is that an ok plan? She will cry, but I know she can go to sleep by herself.

Offline 4isstillnighttime

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Re: 8.5 month twins, night waking and early morning waking,
« Reply #92 on: April 29, 2014, 19:36:00 pm »
Feel mean though....

Offline babybarr

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Re: 8.5 month twins, night waking and early morning waking,
« Reply #93 on: April 29, 2014, 20:02:45 pm »
Def sounds like a plan and something you (and I) need to do.
LAURA xx




Offline 4isstillnighttime

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Re: 8.5 month twins, night waking and early morning waking,
« Reply #94 on: April 30, 2014, 08:42:17 am »
Well....turns out I didn't need to. C slept til 1, then fed, woke at 3 but just grumbled herself back to sleep, 4 and fed and up at 5:15. Z up at 2 to feed, then 4:30 to feed and didn't really go back to sleep. But.....I went to bed at 8:30 so had a reasonable amount of sleep, they woke up happy and we've had a nice morning. Went down for nap really easily at 9:10 so will wake by 10 if they aren't up and then try and hold out til 1:30 for next nap. Feeling v positive esp as found a forgotten Easter egg in cupboard which I are for breakfast  ;D

The only thing is.....they are only really getting 10 hours of sleep a night. Plus 2.5 - 3.5 in the day if we do well. Is this enough or should I move bedtime a bit earlier? Couldn't face earlier waking is the only thing....

Offline nippo

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Re: 8.5 month twins, night waking and early morning waking,
« Reply #95 on: April 30, 2014, 08:50:11 am »
That sounds like a really good plan

I think when you are sleep training there are good days and bad. Some days they would wake 3 times in an hour, other days they would go down for 2 hours or more! Babies just are unpredicatible little people.

When we tried shushing them to sleep some days they would need us to pat them all the way into sleep. I kinda just gave them what they needed. It did feel a bit like I was going backwards especially when we got to the point when we knew they could resettle.  And we'd have to go back in and put them to sleep.

The key is to try not to pick them up. We did exactly what you're doing. My husband stayed up until 2am and I would deal with night wakings after. We then decided we would take a baby each. My husband took the better sleeper midweek and then we'd swap. Later it became clear that I needed more sleep - I work too - all day with no break. So we split the week. And it was easier to handle the exhausting night waking.

I still remember how desperately exhausted I was. I called my friend almost in tears as I just wanted to know when I would see any improvement. The thing is, the wake ups are all part of them learning, and at some point in the next few weeks something will happen and you will notice they are doing something differently... Hang in there. You really are doing brilliantly.

P.s are you using blackout blinds? Really helped me

Xx
« Last Edit: April 30, 2014, 08:52:13 am by nippo »
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Offline nippo

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Re: 8.5 month twins, night waking and early morning waking,
« Reply #96 on: April 30, 2014, 08:53:14 am »
Easter egg breakfasts are the best! I had some this morning too!
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Offline 4isstillnighttime

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Re: 8.5 month twins, night waking and early morning waking,
« Reply #97 on: April 30, 2014, 09:05:01 am »
Thanks nippo! I never pick them up, but know what you mean about good and bad days. You're right, I think we just have to go with it a bit! They have put themselves to sleep for their nap with me outside the room shhhhing and also z woke up but put herself back to sleep and C hasn't needed a resettle. So this is all good!

I should get some blackout blinds then! Do you have the ones that attach to the window?


Offline Uglybethy

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Re: 8.5 month twins, night waking and early morning waking,
« Reply #98 on: April 30, 2014, 09:40:19 am »
Glad you had that chunk of sleep. Very soon it will be even longer!
Re total amount of sleep: it think the as they mature and grow and take more from breast feedings as well as regular food the mornings will start later, filling in that 1-2 extra hours they really need.
And black out blinds could help a bit with that for now.
I don't think you need to bring bed time earlier just yet but if may need to on the occasion where perhaps it's a 5 am start followed by only 2hrs total nap time for example.... But now I'm teaching you to suck  (Easter) eggs!
« Last Edit: April 30, 2014, 09:45:49 am by Uglybethy »

Offline nippo

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Re: 8.5 month twins, night waking and early morning waking,
« Reply #99 on: April 30, 2014, 10:47:32 am »
I got gro blinds - they sucker to the window. We found ours began waking at 5am because of the light coming in. They naturally think it's morning. And daytime naps were quite short and easily disturbed because they saw light through the window and they instantly woke up.

Now it's not pitch black, but dark enough for them to think it is dark outside and they get quite drowsy as a result - ready for bed.  In BW book I remember light being one of the main reasons for wakings etc. It took me ages to actually invest in one because in winter it was dark early - but I have now realised that it is essential for mine to sleep a bit longer during the day. We still battle with day naps but not the 20 minutes that we used to get (although it still happens occasionally).

I think some people also recommend easy blind which Velcro's to the window. But I found mine on offer and it was cheap so it was better to try a cheap solution and see if it worked first...
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Offline 4isstillnighttime

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Re: 8.5 month twins, night waking and early morning waking,
« Reply #100 on: April 30, 2014, 13:19:47 pm »
I've just ordered some!! At that price I can't really lose!

Well, I was weak and let them sleep an hour this morning as they looked so cute and I was enjoying my coffee. And I have paid for it as it has just taken Z 30 mins to settle!

Onwards and upwards!!

Offline nippo

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Re: 8.5 month twins, night waking and early morning waking,
« Reply #101 on: April 30, 2014, 14:08:00 pm »
Try not to worry. I got a bit obsessed with how long it took them to actually go down. Now I'm actually through it, I can see that the point is that they did actually go down independently of you!! Yippee - big pat on the back. You will see that once they learn how to do it, the anxiety you feel when you leave them and hear them making noise will become less and less until it really is nothing.

I literally sat outside the door punishing myself listening to every squeak and moan and wondering if I was damaging them. I dreaded every nap time and bedtime. I wanted my husband not to go to work because I found it so hard dealing with them both. But it does get easier. I didn't stagger mine because they would disturb each other - I'm not sure if that is an option for you?

I think that in all my my anxiety I did lose sight of the fact that each time they went to sleep (even if only for 20 mins) they were still learning to go to sleep without me. And eventually they began to do this at night. I also began to learn the difference between a real cry and a whine and a mantra cry. My bigger twin never liked me leaving her and would whine as I left the room. That went on for about 4 months and she has only just stopped doing it. I struggled with whether to go in or hang back...in the end I played it by ear. If she sounded really needy I would stay with her until she settled (but not right into sleep), other times I would hold off for a minute and she would stop and go to sleep. I am hoping that by going in when she needs me I will avoid separation anxiety...
« Last Edit: April 30, 2014, 14:22:46 pm by nippo »
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Offline 4isstillnighttime

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Re: 8.5 month twins, night waking and early morning waking,
« Reply #102 on: May 01, 2014, 03:07:52 am »
I am at the end of my tether. They settled perfectly at the beginning of the night, I wasn't even in the room. C wke up at 10 and I helped her find her dummy. Then they both woke at 1 and I fed them. Then C woke at 3....and I have resettled her 13 times in the last hour. She has had calpol, back rubbing, dummy, shh pat.....she goes back to sleep but wakes up again even if I carry on doing it. I'm feeding her again  now although I cannot imagine she was hungry at 3 but I am on my knees with tiredness. I cried for 2 hours yesterday morning just out of sheer exhaustion. I have been sleep training them for months and nothing is getting any better. It's 4 am, I've been awake since 3 and will have to get up in an hour. My husband isn't home til Friday afternoon. I just don't think I can cope any more.

Offline nippo

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Re: 8.5 month twins, night waking and early morning waking,
« Reply #103 on: May 01, 2014, 05:49:53 am »
Lilyrose22,

You are doing so well. I know exactly how you feel and if it is too hard then get through it doing what you need to do until your husband gets home.

You need to rest and so don't worry if you need to apop for a bit to get through the night.

I had many nights like this and I actually was quite depressed because I was exhausted. Do you have somebody who can come round to give you a couple of hours of sleep?
« Last Edit: May 01, 2014, 09:13:53 am by nippo »
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Offline Sarah - Enfys' Mum

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Re: 8.5 month twins, night waking and early morning waking,
« Reply #104 on: May 01, 2014, 05:54:01 am »
Ugh, I hate nights like that. We get them too, it's rotten. Did she go back to sleep in the end?  I hope so.