Really struggling with easy and highly sensitive LO- some moral support please?

[Honeymonster]

Hello all I've been struggling trying to start implementing easy with a vet it and so little one.we seem to get on well when oh is there at the weekends for moral support but when I'm on my own I'm finding it so difficult as I feel quite down being in the house on my own with LO all the time and getting very sleepy and losing focus and perspective. Feel like I'm getting obsessed by naps. She gets Ot and OS so quickly and random things keep throwing off our whole day.. Like she often night feeds at about 530 and goes back down really quick but then wakes up needing a poo with wind about 6.30-7 so she's not hungry enough to feed and start the day but the wind wakes her then she's already OT as she wasn't ready to wake.. And the whole day is seeming to mess up from there. Today she pooed right through her Jammie's so had to change her and by that point there was no chance getting her back to sleep.

I feel like every nap she's ending up screaming for as we just can't get her down quick enough. And she's really struggling to transition between sleep cycles(a bit if wind isn't helping)

I'm just finding it all very stressful as I see how tired she is and she just won't sleep. Tonight she was soo tired by bed time she screamed like I've never seen before her whole body was shaking. Pat shh seems to aggitate get more so we've just been cuddling her in when she's like that and we put a black pillowcase over our shoulder as she peers over and stares at anything she can. She's so nosey.

I guess I feel that what she needs is some real focus and really low key couple of weeks but I feel like I'm on the verge of getting pnd when I don't get out of the house so I'm torn between wanting to get her routine established and thinking I should be housebound and focus  but on the other hand it's not heathy for her or me to be sitting in a greeting mess in the house all day.

She's just soo easily overstimulated.. Should I just resign myself to the fact that she's a sensitive soul and is going to need a very low key start to her life? Or would it be easier to do the odd thing once her routine is established?

I should say she's 9weeks and textbook/spirited

How long did it take others to establish their routine at this age and how did you cope with staying in or did you?
 

[MasynSpencerElliotte]

(((Hugs))) my DD2 was a touchy/spirited very sensitive baby, so prone to OS and OT as an infant. Honestly, I did end up staying home for quite a bit (not hard to do here though, live rural with nowhere to go and dh's work allowed him to be home early to take DD1 out and about) to help her establish a routine and keep things low key. Just looking at a reflection would get her worked up!

Oh, one thing I did was totally black out her bedroom and use white noise for sleeps so she had nothing to look at! I even took electrical tape to the night light on her monitor!

[Honeymonster]

I think blacking out with the light evenings is going to be important. We have a black out blind but the light gets in the edge and she stares at it. I've just got my mum to go but a black sheet we can pin over the window too. I'm feeling a but better today as she had a good sleep and woke up perfect this morning so was able to start from scratch today. Went down in her cot with paci for first nap woke up after 45 mins but I managed to resettle on my chest and she's taking the second half there now. Have to go out at lunch today but I'm going to put her in the sling and go out during activity time so hopefully she'll dose off by nap time then I'll just keep her in there for her full nap. I think the fact she's a bit gassy means the sling is the best thing if we have to take her out.

How is your spirited/touchy LO now?

[cath~]

((Hugs))

My DD1 is spirited and sensitive and I second the suggestion of blacking out the room and also using white noise (it really works!).  Do you swaddle?  That also helped.

TBH with my DD1 I don't think we ever got a day that looked like one of the sample easy routines (not until she was on 2 or even just 1 nap) and I got quite hung up on consistency.  The difficulty was that naps just weren't consistent.  Also, every time we had a wonder week things would go really wonky for a while and it could just be impossible for her to nap in her Moses basket.

Luckily, she did nap well in the buggy and the carrier so, for my sanity, I got out a lot.  Morning naps in the Moses basket went much better, but they got trickier as the day went on, so I used to take her out for walks for naps for my own sanity.

I can say now though that she is a really good sleeper and I don't think that getting out and about so much did her any harm in the long run.  Indeed, it kept me sane which can only be a good thing when you're a mum!

So my advice would be do what you can with naps, but if it's too hard don't be afraid to get out and about if it makes it easier. It will make you feel soooo much better.  Also, don't get too hung up on achieving the perfect EASY cos that will most likely lead to frustration (maybe not, but better to be pleasantly surprised than frustrated and stressed IMO).  This is such a short period in your lo's life I'd try to do what you can to make it as enjoyable as possible and not stress too much about EASY when it gets really tough.

[Florena49]

Hugs and i second everything that was said, dont het hung up on naps, only noe and LO is nearly 24 weeks are we getting more less of a stable routine, and we are on two naps now so that makes it easier.
We had days/ weeks when LO would only sleep in the pram for all sleeps and even BT ( we would transfer him into his cot after he fell asleep) you need to get out of the house to be sane and happy, our EASY never looked like A perfect routine, and its ok it doesnt have to be perfect.
Not sure how old your LO is, but when your ready and LO old enough you can always ST.

[MasynSpencerElliotte]

My touchy girl is now almost 6! She has been an excellent sleeper since about 7 months or so when she was finally able to self settle for all naps and night time too, plus we dropped the df then too. Also her A times were longer so getting out was easier (none of my kids has ever slept in a carseat or stroller reliably!).

[weaver]

You're getting excellent advice here, want to add to the hugs

Remember that she's still very little. Given that she's so sensitive I would try using a sling or carrier with her, my touchy LO1 really loved to be physically close and it kept his stress levels low. At her age you could use it for both awake and sleep time, probably, then you could get out for a little walk

Hugs I did find my touchy LO emotionally draining at first. But they are very rewarding little folks, that sensitivity is so wonderful as they grow.

[MasynSpencerElliotte]

DD2's ap of choice was to be held super tight (not rocked mind you, just a big squeeze with her face in my neck). Wish I had had a moby wrap or similar as the sling was great but hurt my back and the wrap was great with DD3. The sling did come in handy when out and about to stop people from wanting to hold DD2 - she was not keen on new people at all, she barely tolerated DH!

[Honeymonster]

Thanks for all the support and advice folks. We had a much better day overall yesterday. She was so cute when we went out in the ergo carrier she was leaning peeking out the gap under the hood and eventually fell asleep when her hat fell down over her eyes and she couldn't see !  Got to the place we were going for lunch and she woke so put her in her pram with the hood over and she oohed and aaahed at a safety pin on the hood for ten mins like it was the funniest thing ever! She eventually fell asleep again on the walk home then by the time we got home had a mega meltdown as it had all been a bit much. She overall slep a lot through the day though and went down without tears at night, we've put a black sheet over the bedroom window and that helped a lot. The older she gets she just seems to get more vocal about her tiredness and her little cry is not very little at all. Having a quiet day today with lots of cuddles on the couch! First nap started well but she woke screaming then had a big poo!! That's her wide awake then :-)

[MarciaMSPT]

Hugs to you Honeymonster... keep up the good work!