How to get five month old to sleep without nursing

[gentlebreeze]

I have only started scheduling over the last few days. I made a big mistake of letting her nurse (exclusively breastfed) to fall asleep since birth, she is now five months and I am trying to wean her off night feeds, which is at usually at 3am and 5am, but varies.

She resists her sleep and her nap times, and it takes me a long time to get her to sleep. I used to walk her up and down the passage for up to thirty minutes, rock her, etc. But since reading BW I stopped.


I tried EASY but it is so hard since she refuses to feed in a waken state and associates feeding with sleeping, and will only nurse when she is tired. I was successful in leaving her in the crib, seeing to her and doing PU/PD every three minutes, for about 30 minutes,she eventually gives in to sleep but I end it with nursing as by then she is very hungry since she doesn't want to nurse after she wakes.

Sleeping at 7pm is not an option since dad comes home that time. So at nine I bath her, do an activity at 9:15, then at 9:30 PU/PD until she gives in, and then I feed her to sleep.

How can I get her to sleep without nursing? In the end I do it because she is hungry and had her last feed at the last nap.

Last night I put her down at 10 and then she woke at 11:30 and I nursed her thinking it would prevent a night waking, and then again at 1:30.

At 4:30 I tried the PU/PD but it didn't work, she stayed up until 6:30 when I eventually nursed her to sleep.

Can anyone help me please?

[nevinsmama]

Hi there! Welcome to BW Can you post a typical day? Having your LO not too UT or OT before sleep can make things much easier. To start some more independent sleep training, I would have a look at shh/pat for one nap per day and increase gradually. Shush-pat - How to

[gentlebreeze]

Thanks, for the advice.

She has done well during daytime naps. I leave her in crib until she whimpers (not cries) and pick up fpr two minutes, and continue for twenty minutes until she's drowsy and only then will she give in to nursing. She will not drink during a waken state at all, she's too distracted, would rather try out her new rolling and creeping skills even in the crib.

During the night she breaks through the swaddle, she can't keep her arms and legs still and can't fall asleep without nursing.

Maybe I should introduce shush pat during daytime naps so she gets the idea.

But he biggest problem is to nurse her while awake and not as a sleeping tool



A typical day is not easy but goes in three-hour cycles. t's not EASY...im trying to get there, but tough since when she wakes the last thing on her mind is eating.


But the day goes from 7am until 10pm, with one nap in the morning and one in the afternoon 2hrs each.

I  nursed her at 11 last night then at 1:30 she woke and we battled til 3:30 and I eventually had to put her to sleep by rocking and walking (the old method I'm trying to wean off).

Hope this is not too confusing, any advice is welcome, especially how to get her to nurse while awake and not falling asleep.

[nevinsmama]

She sounds like a lively one! Things will get easier! I think you have a great attitude towards doing a very gradual transition to EASY with her. Have you taken the Know Your Baby Quiz?The BW "Know Your Baby Quiz"
I realize you are making an effort to keep her awake to eat well yet keeping her from being to distracted while eating and staying on task is tough! I am going to ask around and see if others have struggled with this as well.
I see she has a really long day. I understand the time with your husband is important, have you considered trying to shift the wake up time a bit later to compensate? But, one thing at a time, right!? I will see what I can find.

[jessmum46]

Just typed a reply as Maryn was posting so have posted it here anyway just in case any of my thoughts help x

There are different ways to stop nursing to sleep but ultimately you kind of just have to stop doing it  . It almost sounds to me like you're actually prolonging the prop unnecessarily - if she's giving in to sleep with PUPD and then you nurse her because you *think* she's hungry then that's not really going to get you anywhere.  Much better to stick with the PUPD/shh pat (it's kind of pointless doing it at all if you eventually give in and nurse anyway) and let her fall asleep without the nursing.  Yes, she may wake hungry after 20-30 mins, but that's not the point.  Short naps and overtiredness are an inevitable part of sleep training.  The more important thing is she falls asleep without using the nursing prop.  And if she's done it once, she can do it again and it will get easier every time . Plus if she does wake up hungry you've got a much much better chance of getting her to feed when awake! 

Hugs, it's a hard one to break but if you decide in your own mind that you will absolutely not nurse her to sleep, then you won't nurse her to sleep (if you see what I mean).  She won't stay awake forever (she can't) and she won't refuse to feed forever (she can't do that either).  Even if she skips a feed or two it's not the end of the world.  Although I'd never say to ignore the cues of a hungry baby, where nursing has become a sleep prop as well as a food source you do kind of have to make a clean break and accept you may get a wonky few days while she gets used to the new order of things.  The good news is at her age habits don't take long to break if you are consistent .

The right routine will also help as Maryn said.  I notice she has a very long day - could you actually post with WU/sleep times?  I suspect she's probably quite overtired and that will also make it much harder to teach her to sleep independently.  We may be able to suggest some changes which will help you all get some more rest