Baby #3 but I still can't get it right - 6 wks and very unsettled!

[shresmummy]

My baby DS is now 6 wks old. He is my third so you'd think I might be able to cope. In fact it's worse this time bcos of having to constantly be on the go due o the other two (they're 5 and 3). So it means morning drop offs and school and preschool, and pm pick ups. Some days DH can help but mostly it's me.

In the early weeks DS would be happy to be in the ergo carrier and would be sleeping and would transfer easily to the car capsule and stay sleeping. But as of this week he keeps waking up,  and cries constantly.its impossible to be home bound and settle him properly for nap. So I've resigned myself to ergo naps and car naps. But he just screams in the car no matter what. And as of yesterday he constantly cries all the time!

We are on a rough eating routine of 2-3 hrs in between.

I'm not sure why he's so unsettled suddenly..today just got me, we were all crying by bedtime!

Can you please help ladies? I need to work out how to fit little DS into our crazy day without him crying all the time in the car.. It stresses me out so much! I always try to feed him before we leave.

He is BF, and I give him an ebm bottle before we leave in the morning. Do babies suddenly start crying more at this age? I vaguely remember that with my other DS.

Thanks heaps!

[shresmummy]

It's another crazy day of crying before every nap even though I'm holding him.. He has good feeds today and also DH did the drop offs so I was home with the baby. He fed well but then still cried heaps when I was trying to rock him for a nap.. I try to keep A times to 45 mins max. But he just has to scre himself silly then calm down and will fall asleep... Only to wake in 10 or 20 mins again,  even if I'm holding him. Then screams again till I feed him  I'm totally demoralised today... What am I doing wrong?

[MasynSpencerElliotte]

(((Hugs))) firstly!

Do you think he could be having a growth spurt at all? Sheesh I'm not that far removed from the nb stage and I cannot remember when they happen!

Also 45 min is pretty low A time, his protests could be due to being UT - this link shows average A times:

Average A times- BOOKMARK ME!

DD3 was not a fan of her carseat (still isnt unless super tired really). But - is he always fed right before going in it? Could he have some trapped wind? DD3 was way worse in her seat if she had trapped wind.

[shresmummy]

Hi, thanks so much for stopping by to have a look at my post! I really appreciate it so in terms of the carseat, usually he finishes a feed about 15 mins before we get in the car... Burps, has a nappy change..then goes in the car.. What im trying hard to understand us why he's always unhappy during the supposed A time😁😁 after a feed I try to put him in the bouncer, he lasts for 5 mins max then cries and fusses. So I put him in the ergo cos he wants to be carried.. Then he's ok for another few mins then fusses again and I'm usually trying to race around madly doing things for the other 2.. In the am he settles quickly for a nap in the ergo.. Other times its a screaming match until he cries himself to sleep or I feed what do you think? I'm baffled.. Don't know if its pain or ot or it? He's 6 wks but was born  at 37 wks.

[clazzat]

My first thought would be that it would be worth investigating reflux or mpi - it is possible that he is protesting short a times, but the waking up screaming and the unhappiness during a times would have me checking out medical issues first. Does he have any of the other symptoms of reflux? Reflux 101 - General reflux information I had two refluxers and went through this stage and the difference when they started the medication was astonishing - like I had been given a different baby.

[shresmummy]

I had a look at the reflux symptoms in the link you posted clazzat, he has some of them,but not others. He does spit up a lot...but he doesn't seem bothered at the time he spits up. It's like he does a burp then stuff comes out a second later. Some days it's lots that comes out other days not so much. I have already cut out dairy from my diet. Would you suggest cutting out anything else? Dairy free diet hasn't changed his spitting up symptoms much. How can you tell whether it's real reflux or just spitting up that a lot of babies do?

Heidi, how should I measure A times when his eyes are closed during bf? He's not asleep bcos he's actively feeding. But has his eyes closed. Then after I take him off, his eyes open..and he's not happy, so I see if he wants to feed dome more, he does sometimes not other times. Then I try to put him on the bouncer or change his nappy, he's ok for literally a few mins then starts fussing. Then I pop him in the carrier and his fussing escalates slowly until he's screaming himself silly then he calms down and closes eyes...then eyes pop open in 10 mins again! He then cries again and finally sleeps for a longer stretch in the carrier. If I try to put him down, he's up in10/20 mins again

How can I get around this? He refuses the dummy as well, and spits up if I try to hold it in place.. He keeps pushing it out.

[MasynSpencerElliotte]

I measured A times from wake up to asleep for next nap - the dozing while bf I did not count. Have you done the quiz to figure out what his temperment is?

The BW "Know Your Baby Quiz"

[clazzat]

He does sound a bit refluxy, tbh. I would go to your doc and ask if you can try a thickener like gaviscon to see if that helps - it did wonders for dd2, and it is pretty harmless if that is not the issue.

[shresmummy]

I am seein my paediatrician on wed for the 6 wk checkup and I will ask him about the reflux then. I also took the quiz. Some questions were not relevant yet but he came up as a touchy one  :)I think I guessed that though

With reflux do they act as though they're in pain during the time they spit up? .

[MasynSpencerElliotte]

Yes some of the questions dont pertain yet, and I found some answers changed as she got older.  Hmm I have had spirited/touchy...the touchy bit is probably not helping esp with possible reflux. I found DD2 (the touchy one) needed zero stimulation at that age - even reflections off of things set her off. For naps I did not know much about babywearing so I used shh/pat in the crib in a blacked out room with white noise going and I had to basically do a clock schedule as a fluid routine was not her thing at all - the sleepy signs meant I had waited too long to put her down!

[clazzat]

My touchy one was very difficult for cues as well - like Heidi if I could see sleepy signs then it was too late.  I also found in the early days that she needed very short a times as she got os so quickly.

The spitting up is not necessarily painful if they have reflux, it is often later when they start to be in pain.

[shresmummy]

Hmmm so I wonder how to make him fit along with the other twos activities and the school drop off run..

I'm not sure I can manage the ultra short A times during the week still least in the am and at pm at pick up time. today I was at home all day with him and didn't go out in the car. I tried to put him down with very short A times but he was still so restless, he would fall asleep a bit easier, but in 5 or 10 mins his eyes would pop open the he'd have a hard time settling again.. It went on like this for ages! Even if I stayed with him. But at night from about 7:45-9:30/10 he seems to be able to settle himself in between. I can hear him grunting and squirming away but he seems to be able yo get back o sleep. Just my luck baby 3 wasn't an angel/textbook!

[shresmummy]

I just wanted to let you know our day today to see what you thought :

wu 7:30am (bf at 5:45 then went back to sleep)
E ebm 100ml
A screamed in car from 8:15-8:30while dropping dd
S in ergo from 8:40-9:10 then transfer to car seat stayed asleep till 10:30 (with a bit of rocking the capsule around 10 during DS swimming class)

E bf at 10:30 very sleepy. Put down then woke up again in 15 mins so fed from. 10:45
A ended up being till nearly 1!! Tried to put him down since 11:45 . Cried for about 15 mins. then refused to settle after that. Was just looking around everywhere. Didn't really cry.
S finally slept around 1pm. Eyes kept popping open every 5 mins. Finally slept 1:30-2 woke up crying.

E bf at 2,
A bath then in ergo
S 3:15 - 5:30 in carrier

E bf 5:30
A had to wait till 7 so I could take other two to bed as well.
S bf again at bt then slept from 7:30-9

Did a big poo and woke up now it's 9:20 pm and I'm feeding again.

I'm not sure why the afternoon went so wrong. He was pretty decent this am though. I wish I could get some naps in the cot longer than 20 mins! What do you think of today?

[MasynSpencerElliotte]

Honestly at that age I had DD3 in her wrap more than the crib. I would try the crib/bassinet firstly but if it was a no go I just wore her. By about 11/12 weeks she was more amenable to the crib. I sort of used the wrap to get the rhythm of our routine without her getting ot which made transitioning easier.

[shresmummy]

Hi ladies, sorry I was missing.. We were all sick with a viral cold . DS included as if things weren't bad enough!

I wanted to update where we were at..
I have started him on losec (1/2tablet twice a day. I started last Wednesday and I thought he was more settled in a couple of days by Friday.. But it didn't last. He got a cold and it's al out of whack now.

I'm doing nothing but the ergo carrier now. Not even attempting naps in the cot. The trouble I'm running into now is that before when he was asleep in the carrier say before we start the school run (during breakfast etc.) then he would stay asleep when I transfer him to the car seat. Now he is more aware of stuff around him and he wakes up . then will not settle again.mthen his next nap is too late and the day goes all over the place

Also should I really be trying for 3 hr gap between all feeds now? He's 8 wks on Friday. He can sometimes go 3 hr if asleep in the carrier without being disrupted. But if he wakes early will want a feed even if it's after 45 mins or an hour.