Baby #3 but I still can't get it right - 6 wks and very unsettled!

[MasynSpencerElliotte]

Totally agree with Sara! Things went wacky here at 4 months.

[shresmummy]

Hi ladies, I just wanted to update how things are. DS is now 10 weeks, I have been on losec at 10 mg in one dosing know for just over a week.. I can't say if things are better fully yet..but I think he is settling down in general. We still have few episodes a day of unexplained crying..but they are reducing

I guess I gave to start working on a routine now. At least most feeds are now 3 hours apart.. Which is a start

What are A times like in general and what should I aim for now? I'm going for 1 hr 15 mins. But sometimes I find that if I put Him down too quickly he naps for only like 10 mins then is wide awake and refuses to resettle. Even in the sling.no cot naps yet.

I have to go now, he's up got a feed but I will be back with our easy from today.. Thanks again!

[clazzat]

Not much time to post, but here is a link to average a times: Average A times- BOOKMARK ME!

[MasynSpencerElliotte]

What I did before I bothered trying to get all the naps in the crib was to use apop to set the timings (so some naps I held her to sleep and laid her down & resettled and others just wore her) so that when I finally tried getting her to self settle that we had a bit of a routine going time wise at least!

[Erin M]

Hi hun - sounds like you've been having quite the time with #3!  My third was such a bad napper as well, I think the combination of being constantly overstimulated by his older sisters and continually being carted around here, there, and everywhere.  I think you're getting some fab advice regarding A times and reflux but I just wanted to pop on and mention that with ds, I would try to get him to sleep in his crib for one nap a day and at night.  He short napped pretty much every nap for months and months so we just went with it the best we could.  Despite all that, he eventually became a really good napper (won't tell you when, it wasn't for a while!) and is the only one of mine who still had a nap at age 3.  He's also an amazing sleeper in general -- so, it really will fall into place eventually. 

[shresmummy]

Thanks ladies... Erin he sleeps in his crib most of the night (at least one thing that I'm trying to be consistent with!).only after 5 am I bring him into bed with me. I think the overstimulation really gets him.. Especually my other DS who's 3 is just literally in his face trying to hug and kiss him every time his eyes are open! He loves him to the point where the baby suddenly can't take it anymore and screams his head off! At least DD is more mature about it!

Heidi, your idea is sort of whet I'm trying tomorrow as well, try to get the times right and then move to cot naps. But I'm still struggling with the timings.. I'm trying to stick to the average A times but at some times of the day he just won't settle and ends up being awake for like 3 hrs!,

Today:

Wu 6:30
E bf 6:30
S 7:45-9:35 this first nap he usually falls asleep easily)

E: 9:35
E again at 11:30 (we had a bday party to attend so he only slept after another feed at 11:30)
 S he slept 11:30-1:30 then I transferred him to car and he continued sleeping till 2:15!!

E 2:20
A was a bit fussy around 3:30 so I tried wearing him for a nap.

Boy the evening went downhill quickly! He screamed and refused to nap then dozed for 10 mins woke crying. Then I fed again at 5, he napped after feed for another 15/20 mins  and he was up fussing in between till 6:30. Then I took kids to bed and fed him again.. I put him in the cot at 7:15 for bt. That's like 5 hrs A time!!!

He has been sleeping since 7:15,  it's 10;20 now. The past few nights when he's had sort of a decent evening nap, he has woken up 45 mins after going to bed. But tonight he's had such an awful evening but night has been better so far..?.?. What do you think?

I need to work towards getting the evenings a bit better....but can't figure out how!

[clazzat]

I wonder if perhaps he is suffering a bit from overstimulation and you need to cut the a times right back - it is possible that he can cope with the "right" amount of a time first thing and give you a decent nap because there isn't so much going on at that time of day, but as the day gets busier there is too much happening for him to switch off and fall asleep.  Have you tried the know your baby quiz yet?  I found that was really helpful for dd2 as I couldn't get her a times right at all - I found that she was 25% angel, textbook, touchy and spirited (), but when I looked at the questions properly I found that all of her touchiness related to sleep and she was getting os very quickly - her sleep improved when I cut her a times for a bit.

[MasynSpencerElliotte]

Good point on OS Clare...my DD2 was very touchy with OS and had some super short A times as an infant, where DD2 & 3 are more textbook with sleep (well except DD3 is low sleep needs but taking that into account she is textbool just on an older baby routine!)

[shresmummy]

Boy I buggered up today! We ended up with like 5 45min naps and a very messed up afternoon.

Basically I think all my problems relate to having to muck up his naps due to needing yo take him out and about all the time due to having things on for the older kids. Each time he's asleep nicely in the carrier, he needs to go in the car, then he wakes up and ot builds up as the day goes on.

I wish there was a way to get him yo have a massive nap from say 11-2 and the cat naps at either end.. That's the only wish I think things can work

I'm feeling so disheartened today. Even if I try lowering the A times and he settles well, I can't keep him staying asleep can I ? Due to having to do other things?

We're you always able to stick to the correct A times? How find you get around the limitation of the older kids scheules?

[MasynSpencerElliotte]

No we were never able to stick to normal A times, which was a blessing in disguise as it was how I figured out how she was super low sleeps needs. With older kids you just have to kind of fit naps in where they work. It gets easier as they need less naps at least!

[shresmummy]

Thanks Heidi, maybe there's something to look forward to! It's literally impossible to stick to normal A times for his age...the only problem is from the quiz I think he's got some touchiness. That's what making it hard I guess. I hope he's like your little one and grows to have higher A times or at least be able to handle them! Or else life's going y to get very tricky!

[Erin M]

We were never able to stick to the "right" A times either -- I felt like he was perpetually OT and OS at that age.  He really did grow out of it eventually but it really just took doing my best with helping him cope for ages. 

[MasynSpencerElliotte]

Thankfully DD3 has been lsn so the weird A times have not bothered her too much - touchiness would make it tougher though.

[shresmummy]

Erin, can you please give me some tips on how to help him cope? That's more or less what I've resigned myself to for the next month or so... Until we get to 2 naps and a cn. He's still just 11 weeks! So I'm hoping we are nearly there. I too feel he's perpetually ot. I think he's getting better at dealing with the os..doesn't burst into tears so often these days poor little fellow.

[Erin M]

Ugh, I wish I had some magic tips to help!  Extra long winddowns when you can but I know that's hard too when you've got older ones.  I'd end up nursing him to sleep in the late afternoon sometimes and attempting to let him catch up that way.  He also did well in the swing in the afternoons so I'd out him in there quite a bit.  But really, time was our best friend there -- it all got easier as he got older and could cope with being OT better.