Author Topic: Want to start EASY but have questions  (Read 3537 times)

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Offline laurab0228

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Re: Want to start EASY but have questions
« Reply #30 on: May 11, 2014, 00:58:59 am »
Thanks so much! The support was greatly appreciated! I was a bit frantic there for a day or two, but it's much better now.

Today actually she slept on her own for her first morning nap for only about 30 minutes.  Then for her nap around lunch she managed an hour and 40 minutes :D! For our afternoon nap we went out to watch daddy's ball game and she napped in her stroller for an hour a half.  Then we did have a catnap from about 4:30-5:30! Wow! It's only one day so far but we'll see if we can stick to it.  ;D

Happy mothers day to all you as well!

Offline laurab0228

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Re: Want to start EASY but have questions
« Reply #31 on: May 12, 2014, 16:48:45 pm »
So I'm still having problems with the short naps.  :-\  I'm pretty sure I'm catching her sleepy signs in time. I loosely swaddle her (she hates being swaddled, fights it and arches her back). Then I sit with her and rock her very very gently until she is drowsy, lay her in her bed and stroke her head for a bit. It usually takes about 15 minutes. She seems totally fine with this, hardly fusses at all, there are a few whimpers early on in the wind down, I think because she is getting sleepy. I leave her for a few minutes and leave the room. I then fret and worry the whole time she's asleep because I so want her to get the sleep she needs. I can't really relax. Then after 30 minutes, she's awake. She looks up at me and smiles and seems content. I think that maybe she's a habitual catnapper so I take her out of the room and do some A time until her next feed. But she's only content for about 5 minutes before there is a full blown melt down until I feed her when her next E time is due.

Then I've tried putting her back to sleep. I usually try to catch her while she's stirring before there is a full blown melt down (which doesn't take her very long). I try shh-pat for a while, but this just seems to enrage her further, no matter how long I try, she just seems to fight it the whole way. So I've tried picking her up and calming her in my arms, then laid her back down, but this has only had mild success, she usually settles for 10 minutes max and then is up, or doesn't settle at all. I tried this numerous times. Is it possible that shh-pat doesn't work for every baby? Should I have not picked her up until she was really upset and let her try to settle herself? She is only 10 weeks old. Personally after those two days last week of constant shh-patting for hours that did nothing for me, I can only handle about 15 minutes of it at a time before I go stir crazy.

Also, I can't quite figure out if she's a textbook baby, a spirited baby, or a grumpy baby. She seems to have aspects of all three. She's hitting all her milestones like a textbook and eats well. But see below to which categories she fits into

SPIRITED
EATING: Very similar to Angel baby in the eating department, but breast feeders can get impatient. If Mum's letdown is too slow, he'll bob off the breasts as if to say, "Hey, what gives?" Sometimes, you need to give a supplement with a bottle until the milk really gets flowing.

Sometimes she can be like this, sometimes not.

ACTIVITES : High energy, feisty and very active. They are ready to jump into almost any situation, and exercise little impulse control or caution when they do. They arc highly reactive and can he aggressive with peers. Because they're usually more cooperative in the morning, avoid afternoon playgroups SO they can wind down.

She is definitely high energy and feisty and active

SLEEP: As babies, they hate being swaddled, but YOU absolutely need to block out any visual stimulation. They tend to be resistant to naps or nighttime rituals, because they don't want to miss anything. If you're lucky, even though they sleep less in the morning, it will be followed by long afternoon nap, which is key to a good night's sleep for these kids.

HATES being swaddled, but doesn't tend to initially resist naps. Only when she wakes up and I try to put her back down.

MOOD: When they want something, they want it now! Opinionated, very vocal, and often stubborn, their moods are mercurial, going quickly from happy' to sad and back again. They love the action but also tend to overdo  it, which can lead to a meltdown. Tantrums are hard to stop once they get going. Transitions can be tough, too.

Definitely her! She can smile at me one second, and cry at my the very next.

HOW THEY'RE OFTEN DESCRIBED: A handful. Always into something.1 don't have the energy to keep up with her. She's fearless.

GRUMPY

EATING: They're very impatient. if breastfed, they don't like to wait for Mum's letdown; they sometimes do better if bottle fed. However, in both cases, feeds can take a long time, which tends to overtire them. They could adapt easily to solids and when they finally do, they tend to insist on the same foods over and over.

Nope, feeds take only about 10-15 minutes

ACTIVITES: They're on the low end of the activity continuum, preferring to play by themselves and to use their eyes and ears more than their bodies. If they're engaged with a toy or an activity, they hate to he interrupted and find it hard to end one thing and start another.

Definitely not her

SLEEP: Sleep doesn't come easily to these babies. They often get overtired because they're so resistant; and then they tend to fuss themselves to sleep. These children also tend to be catnappers, sleeping only in forty minute stretches, which sets oil a vicious cycle ~see pages 249-252). BWSAYP

Yes! She is definitely overtired and is a catnapper.

MOOD: As we say in Yorkshire, these babies are often "on the Fuss. Like a simmering pot that you have to watch to make sure it doesn't boil over, you have to keep an eye on their emotional signs. The slightest variation from routine can set them off : a missed nap, stimulating activity, too much company. Without routine , their lives are in turmoil, and eventually  they takeover your life.

HOW THEY'RE OFTEN DESCRIBED: What a sourpuss. He seems to prefer playing in his own. I feel like I am always waiting for the next meltdown. He always has to have his own way.

She sure has meltdowns easy!

I'm just not sure what to do at this point.  ??? I am getting increasingly frustrated and discouraged.

Have I just hit a wonder week? I don't think she's hitting a growth spurt yet. She never used to be this fussy before, even when she was overtired and not on a more strict routing. Also, she was always such a good night sleeper, usually going to bed around 8:00-9:00, sleeping for 6-8 hours a night, having one night feed, and then waking up from 6:00-7:00. Now she's up two times a night (last night was 11:30 and 3:00) and awakes at 5:00-5:30 every morning. She seems to be rooting for a feed, to which I think she must be hungry, but then I go to put her back down after I feed her and she might sleep for 20-30 minutes, or she might fuss as soon as I put her down.

I'm just not sure how to keep her on routine? I also think she might sleep better during the night if I can get her to sleep better during the day, but I just can't seem to do it. She doesn't seem to even want to sleep in her swing, only in the car or in the stroller.  Our routine looks more like this:

E A S A E, and repeat. I just wish I could get some more Y time. 
 
As of right now I am WAY off routine, taking more of a follow-babies-lead approach. I try to get out once a day because otherwise I get cabin fever. We have a dog so I take her for walks everyday which I think helps my mood at least.

I'm confused! :-\ ??? 

Offline Jbla17

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Re: Want to start EASY but have questions
« Reply #32 on: May 13, 2014, 05:16:47 am »
Hi Laura,

Ha! I know that feeling of hanging by the door willing them to go to sleep or stay asleep! Its terrible! I was doing this a fair bit and I have just in the last month or two relaxed about it. My mum jsut told me to chill out a bit and I finally took it on board  :) First time mum, you just want to make sure everything is correct!! Honestly it will never be perfect, I know none of my friends bubs have perfect naps day in day out....Angel Baby or not  ;)

To give yourself a break, just go wit it for now and organise your routine around her short naps. I know you don't have much time to yourself to regroup and that is probably the hardest thing. Don't tire yourself and DD out with shh/pat, maybe just try to extend one nap a day and the others just enjoy her if she is happy to be awake.

Right now I'm trying to figure out my DD again, major routine change!!

You probably have a spirited/ grumpy bub, that questionare just gives you a little insight to the kind of bub you have but its not the be all end all  :)

Please don't be discouraged! It is all up and down all the time, trust me!! No-one tells you this when your pregnant though  ;) I think apparently you forget what all this was like and then you go for round 2!

Now, with Wonder Weeks I would highly recommend the book and if not definitely the app...think it cost like $1.99. Worth it just to prep you to expect things to go a little haywire and then it seems easier to handle. Your DD would be nearly 11 weeks now. If she was born on her due date she is due for another WW around 11 1/2 to 12 1/2 weeks. This is a relatively short one... they get longer and more exasperating. But, you will be a pro by then!!

Do what you feel is best for DD  :) You are doing great!