What's going on with my 13 months old?

[jessmum46]

Ugh, it's not fun is it this transition?  If you don't think short am, long pm will work then I think you probably need to do as Sara suggested and start pushing the whole day forwards in 15 min increments.  So set a 'not before' time for naps e.g. 10am or 5h A, whichever is later and then work from there moving both naptime and BT.

[AMJ]

Hi Sara and Katherine.

I was able to get her to nap yesterday, she was just exhausted, but it took 30m of crying and fighting it. She probably thought it was an early BT (I gave her dinner before the nap) She woke up in 35m but resettled but i got her up anyways(it took me few mins to get to her) and kept her up till 7pm. She fell asleep at 7:30pm. then almost woke up 3;40ish and kept moving around till 4;15. then eventually woke up at 5am. Should i try 2nd nap again since it didnt do any good yesterday?

Ladies, I'm confused, sorry. I see that 5 hrs of morning A is not the right amount of A for her because she is still tired after 1hr50m nap,(at least maybe until she catches up on her sleep and we are through the OT)  should I bring it down till 4hrs30/45m?
 How do I push her nap forward if we can't get a good nap?previously I've pushed her till 6hrs15m to try and get a good nap but she just got more OT.  in my understanding we need to establish the right morning A and then push it by 15m but maybe i'm wrong.

i just dont know if i should work on fighting the OT first and then once we are in a proper routine for her push her day forward?
im confused and tired.

P. S.
Katherine, if I set 'not before' 10am or 5hrs nap what time should I offer the BT ?why is this better then set nap/BT?

[ZacsMumme]

1hr50 is so good nap though so even if she is still tired she will be catching up and getting shorter As through the day to BT iykwim.

What are you doing at 5am? Are you keeping her in bed till a reasonable hour ie 6am?

With my first LO I did something like this in the transition, it may work for you

WU 6 (do t could A before this and keep in bed or in dark room with you cuddling)
A 4.5 hrs
Nap 10.30 for as long as she likes.
A 4-4.5hrs
CN ~4.30 ish in car for 20 mins (otherwise refused in our house)
BT 7-7.30

I kind of think if this doesn't work, and a morning  doesn't work your only other option is to push through that OT with a setish nap time. EBT and APOP wherever you can if she wakes from her nap early.

What do you think

[AMJ]

I thought someone mentioned 1hr50m is an OT nap? And it seems like for us it is

That sounds great and I tried giving her a CN nap yesterday earlier then usually because she was just so tired but she refused it at 4pm. Then I got her up, fed her dinner and tried again at 5pm, she chatted for  very long time and fell asleep at 5:50pm. I just let her sleep as it was BT. Then she WU at 3:30am and she is up and chatting.Finally asleep at 4:35 and then up at 5;20am for the day. At 9 am she was looking tired (weird but she only shows tired signs when she is in OT loop) but i tried stretching her and got her in the crib at 9:30 to have her asleep at the same A as yesterday (4hrs15m) but she fell asleep 9:50 so 4.5hrs of A. Then we are back to 1hr50m nap. She is up at 11:40 what do I do with the rest of the day???

Yesterday she woke up at. 5am and only had 4hrs15m of morning A but finally napped for 2hr10m! But such a short morning A left us with a huge second A and refused nap and then taking 50m to fall asleep cause a 3:30 morning wu

I usually leave her in the crib until 6am. She plays bubbles and closer to 5:40 ish starts to get whiny but I don't go in at all until 6:00.

P. S. I know it is usually a good thing but she only sleeps in her crib, never in a stroller or the car which makes it hard to APOP the nap.

So should i then start with set nap and set EBT (11;30 am nap, 6:00 pm BT) or do the "not before" 10am or 5hr A? and if the "not before" then what time would you suggest the BT should be?
thank you so much!

[AMJ]

P. S. sorry i have so many questions. From your experience what would you suggest, giving her a shorter morning A (following her tired signs instead of the clock) so she can have a good 2hr+ nap and then be left with a long evening A(if she doesn't take a cn) or following the clock in the morning and then have her nap for 1hr50m because she gets OT before the nap but be left with a shorter evening A. In both examples trying to have a 12/12.5hrs day.
thank you

[ZacsMumme]

I'm in two minds really Hun. You may have to go with your gut on which one to take.

1) if you believe your LO does best on a shorter A ie less than 4.5 hrs and needs the CN then try capping the AM Nap and make that the CN, and offer the longer nap in the arvo ie 1-3pm. (Anything over 1.5 hrs with a CN is fine really)
2) push through the OT with set nap times and use EBT for bad naps ie 1.5 or less.

When we went to one nap we tried to have a max A time through the day of 10 hrs. So if it was 4.5 then nap T could cope with up to 5.5 before BT. Sometimes he would do loooong naps though and his total A is uld be closer to 9.5 hrs. I think possibly a 12 hr day with a nap less than 2 hrs is too much for him (ie the total A in a day) but I know with the EW it's really tough as you get stuck in a loop of EBT EW.

What do you think? Maybe we can make up a plan on your choice and try it for a week x

[AMJ]

Ha Sara .

A plan would be great!

I am trying a morning CN today. She WU at 4:40am(11hr10m night) and was tired at 8:30(A 4 hr)but it was a snack time so I got her in the crib at 9 she was it and fell asleep at 9:20 (A 4hrs40m). I woke her at 9:50am. So now hopefully I can read her signs and put her for a nap on time. (2-3hrs of A) she is so grumpy and is hating everything.

Do you think I should've given her a CN earlier when she showed tired signs or stretch her till 9am? And do you think 2-3 hrs of A after it is ok? What time BT ?

Thank you!

[ZacsMumme]

I think 2-3 hrs A is fine for a 30 min CN. (((Hugs))) she will be cranky and tired today but maybe if the morning CN works you can set a long pm nap (remember to try to extend it if she does an OT short nap) and this  will also help with the EW.

If you get a good nap ie 12/12.15-2/2.15 maybe go for 6.30 BT or thereabouts? What do you think.

[AMJ]

Sounds good. Tbh I haven't try to extend her naps for a while since every time I come in she thinks it's time to get up so I usually avoid coming in. What should I do? Just come in and say it's nap time and leave, and do that over and over again if she cries for 30m or so??

If the nap is not good what time should I offer BT?

Thanks so much!!!

[ZacsMumme]

Well I'm terrible and APOP like mad at all early nap WU if T isn't settling on his own he's an independent sleeper usually though it's often teething or illness that mess us up I usually go in, scoop up and gently cuddle or rock with his lovey and dummy. I he's teething I give teething gel or Pamol. Often he just drops back off after a few mins, then I pd into the cot once he's settled, or back asleep.

If you get another disaster nap then IIWM I'd do 6pm BT and hope for 11-12 hrs night sleep xx

[AMJ]

Oh lucky you, for us this never worked. She was laughing last time I tried rocking her. Fingers crossed she will have a long nap. She's been rubbing her eyes throughout the whole A so far so I have no clue what time to put her down

[ZacsMumme]

Maybe go for 12? and if she stirs mid nap give her a chance to resettle. If you think it will help her settle or sleep longer offer a bottle or bf before the nap (if your still giving milk)

[AMJ]

Hi, I had her in the crib at 11:40. She was fighting it for 30m and fell asleep at 12:10. She slept for 1hr40m and woke up at 1:55pm (although she almost WU at 20m, 30m and 1hr10m). Yey thank you for guiding me thought it! I truly appreciate it.

Should I be aiming for an earlier BT since her nap wasn't 2hrs and since she WU at 4:40am?

Do you think tomorrow I should stick with exactly the same A times or I should follow her sleepy cues and put her earlier for a CN?

[ZacsMumme]

Well done.
What about trying for BT of 6.30? I know it's a long day but if you don't think she will tack on a 6pm BT the. You may not have a choice? - if you think she will do at least 11 hrs then you could go for 6. Xx

[ZacsMumme]

Oh I think I'm too late! hope you get a good night