Sorry if this is a bit long...really hoping people have some ideas that will work for our lo!
We've been cluster feeding (BF) our 7 week old and its been working great so far. He won't take a dream feed, which is fine, I'm happy to do cluster and then motn feed instead of a dream feed, it suits me. He will feed at 5-7-9 or 4-6-8 or somewhere in between and after the last BF he goes down really easily and does his long sleep.
We just started to give him a FF in the early evening (numerous reasons) and he's taken it fine so far but I'd like it to be the last feed of the evening. His dad doesn't get home until 7.30 ish and we want dad to do bath and bottle feed at some point after this. The problem is that he's not half as sleepy after formula so we have to spend quite a while putting him down. We're also having trouble fitting in a bath (without him being hungry and screaming or tired and screaming) and bedtime routine.
For example, on the BF routine:
E 5pm
A 5.45
S catnap 6.15
E 7pm/7.30,
A 7.45
S catnap 8.15
A bath/pjs 9pm ish
E 9.30pm
Sleep straight after 9.30pm feed
(this is changeable depending on how well he goes down for naps)
On the BF/FF routine:
E 5pm
A 5.45
S catnap 6.15
E 7pm/7.30,
A 7.45
S catnap 8.15
A bath/pjs 9pm ish
E 9.30pm
A wide awake for another half hour ish
S 10.30 (also fussed for 20 minutes after falling asleep)
On both routines he slept for at least 4 hours then.
Does anyone have ideas for routines that include the late formula feed as well as a bath/bedtime routine at some point after 7.30? It has to be a bit flexible because his daytime feeds change each day still.
Should we try to keep him awake between feeds? Move the cluster feeds further apart or closer together? Give him a bath directly after a feed instead of waking him before the next feed? We're happy to put him to bed a bit earlier but not before dad gets home. Also he's always wide awake in the early evening so seems to need his A time. He also needs to be woken fully to take a feed, so for example if we wanted him to feed at 7 and 9, if we put him to bed at 7, we'd then have to wake him fully for the 9pm feed. He just doesn't feed at all when half asleep unless he's woken himself (eg for the 2am feed he's not wide awake but has half-woken himself in hunger so will feed).
Then there's the morning waking...he'll have his long sleep, and then a normal sleep (ie 3 hours between feeds, so around 2.25 hrs sleep) and then wake up sometime around 4-5am for his next feed. I try to settle him for a while but eventually after up to 30 mins of slight fussing he'll start crying for his feed. No matter what I do he'll only feed around 10/15 mins, even with a nappy change and re-swaddle in the middle, he'll just keep falling back asleep (though not asleep enough to settle back in the crib of course!).
Then if it's ~5.30 or later he'll be WIDE awake and will need to get up and have A time before napping. If he finished his feed any earlier (eg feeds from 4 - 4.45) then he might go back down for another hour or so but will generally fuss every 20 minutes meaning I don't get to sleep. I've been trying to get him out of the habit by settling him each time he fusses both before and after feeding but no matter what he's usually up by around 6am. I don't mind him WAKING at 6, but this is usually after a feed so I've already been up for an hour feeding him before we get out of bed. Should I change the bedtime/night feeds? Should I be doing something different in the morning? Or at this age do I just need to grin and bear it until he's a bit older?
