Author Topic: 9 month old sleep regression and separation anxiety  (Read 3081 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline laanantha

  • New & Learning The Ropes!
  • *
  • Showing Appreciation 0
  • Posts: 10
  • Location:
9 month old sleep regression and separation anxiety
« on: June 18, 2014, 21:34:50 pm »
Hi

My baby just turned 9 months last week.  He has always been a great sleeper and has been doing 7-7 more or less although we have had a week of night wakings due to a growth spurt, and some early wakings which seemed to have sorted themselves out.

This last week he has been waking up at erratic times in the night - 10pm, midnight, 3am, 4am etc.  Usually just once a night though.  He stands up in his cot screaming and won't resettle unless he is held or rocked.  If we put him down too early then he stands up again and screams. Tonight he woke up after only 45 minutes and was screaming for over an hour.  I tried to just sit by his bed, and comfort him but he continued screaming, even when I picked him up. 

He seems to have bad separation anxiety at the moment, he was crying whenever I put him down and following me around the house.  He is also cruising although he has been doing that for a few weeks now.  I just went back to work three days ago and my husband is looking after him at the moment.

The rest of his EASY is pretty good still and our usual day is :

7am - WU & milk
8:15 - breakfast
10am - nap
11:15 - milk
12:45 - lunch
2:30pm - nap
4pm - snack
5pm - dinner
6:30pm - milk
7pm - bed

He is still quite good at going to sleep by himself and we always put him down to sleep for naps or bedtime awake.  Although this week we have had two occasions when he cried when we put him down for bedtime.

My husband has managed to resettle him a few times by lying on the floor next to him so I thought that we could try the gradual withdrawal method but tonight when I tried comforting him and sitting on the floor he still carried on screaming. How do I stop him screaming using this method? Do I just sit and watch him crying??

I am thinking this is probably due to separation anxiety and the 9 month sleep regression and am hoping it will pass but I don't want to create any new bad habits while riding it out.  He will go to sleep when he is rocked which we have done in the past when he has woken up at night but it used to happen so seldom that I wasn't really worried about creating a habit before. 

I don't think he is teething at the moment, although he doesn't have any teeth so I am not sure what to expect. Calpol and nurofen don't make much difference.

So, do I need to try some form of sleep training now or can I try to see what happens over the next few weeks and rock him to sleep if he needs it?

Thanks for your help.

Offline Skadiver13

  • General Sleep
  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 44
  • Posts: 2770
  • Location: New York
Re: 9 month old sleep regression and separation anxiety
« Reply #1 on: June 20, 2014, 22:44:03 pm »
Hi hun, sorry for the delayed reply. I would give it just a bit of time to see if it works itself out. If he goes to sleep independently i.e. you put him down and leave and he falls asleep without you in the room than maybe you could try walk in walk out to get him back to sleep? I know with my son if I stay in the room at all it makes it worse but if I calm him down and then leave and let him fuss a bit before going back in. Maybe you could try that? I would try to avoid rocking him back to sleep. I too did this :) and it turned into a very very bad prop. 

My dreamed for Angel Baby DD (other than dreaded 40min naps) Born 4/30/16
Reflux, MSPI, Love my Spirited,textbook little munchkin DS Born 5/17/2012



**Siobhan**

Offline laanantha

  • New & Learning The Ropes!
  • *
  • Showing Appreciation 0
  • Posts: 10
  • Location:
Re: 9 month old sleep regression and separation anxiety
« Reply #2 on: June 28, 2014, 19:27:31 pm »
Thanks for your reply.  The last week hasn't been as bad with his night wakings, but he now seems to be waking up in the evenings after one or two sleep cycles, although a few times it has been after half an hour.  He wakes up crying and then stands up in his cot.

I wondered if it was a routine issue as he had seemed less sleepy at bedtime, but I reduced his morning nap by 15 minutes and so he stays up an extra 15 minutes before bed but he still woke up again this evening.

I don't know whether this is just the 9 month sleep regression and we will have to wait for it to pass or if there is something that I can be doing.

Offline Skadiver13

  • General Sleep
  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 44
  • Posts: 2770
  • Location: New York
Re: 9 month old sleep regression and separation anxiety
« Reply #3 on: June 28, 2014, 20:21:23 pm »
What's your current easy? any tweaking you do will take time to see results it usually takes my ds three to four daya of a change for it to work.
My dreamed for Angel Baby DD (other than dreaded 40min naps) Born 4/30/16
Reflux, MSPI, Love my Spirited,textbook little munchkin DS Born 5/17/2012



**Siobhan**

Offline laanantha

  • New & Learning The Ropes!
  • *
  • Showing Appreciation 0
  • Posts: 10
  • Location:
Re: 9 month old sleep regression and separation anxiety
« Reply #4 on: June 28, 2014, 20:25:16 pm »
7am - WU & milk
8:15 - breakfast
10am - nap
11am - milk
12:45 - lunch
2:15pm - nap
3:45pm - snack
5pm - dinner
6:45pm - milk
7pm - bed

That is true, I only changed it yesterday which was a bit of a mess up day anyway because of car journeys so maybe I just need to hang on for awhile.

Offline Skadiver13

  • General Sleep
  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 44
  • Posts: 2770
  • Location: New York
Re: 9 month old sleep regression and separation anxiety
« Reply #5 on: June 28, 2014, 20:27:15 pm »
Is he only doing a 1hr nap in the am?
My dreamed for Angel Baby DD (other than dreaded 40min naps) Born 4/30/16
Reflux, MSPI, Love my Spirited,textbook little munchkin DS Born 5/17/2012



**Siobhan**

Offline laanantha

  • New & Learning The Ropes!
  • *
  • Showing Appreciation 0
  • Posts: 10
  • Location:
Re: 9 month old sleep regression and separation anxiety
« Reply #6 on: June 28, 2014, 20:34:15 pm »
Yes. He was doing an hour and fifteen minutes but I cut it down and he is staying awake an extra fifteen minutes at the end of the day. (I brought the afternoon nap forward by 15 mins so that middle awake time is still the same as it was). He seems fine with the routine during the day so far.

Offline AbbaG

  • New & Learning The Ropes
  • *
  • Showing Appreciation 0
  • Posts: 30
  • Location:
Re: 9 month old sleep regression and separation anxiety
« Reply #7 on: June 29, 2014, 11:38:40 am »
When my son woke at night either 40(ish) minutes or 1 hour after going to sleep it was because he was overtired when going to sleep? Perhaps he needs that extra 15 minutes of sleep... Or if he doesn't, it may take some adjusting time.

Offline laanantha

  • New & Learning The Ropes!
  • *
  • Showing Appreciation 0
  • Posts: 10
  • Location:
Re: 9 month old sleep regression and separation anxiety
« Reply #8 on: June 29, 2014, 18:15:44 pm »
Thanks for your replies.  He started waking and crying in the evenings a week or so before I made his awake time 15 minutes longer, and he had been on the same EASY routine for over a month without any problems.  That is why I wondered if he was actually under tired and then his separation anxiety was making him cry if he woke up.  I will see what happens the next few days.  He also seems to be off his food and he had a bit of a temperature tonight so who knows if we have teething or a virus to complicate things! 

Offline Skadiver13

  • General Sleep
  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 44
  • Posts: 2770
  • Location: New York
Re: 9 month old sleep regression and separation anxiety
« Reply #9 on: June 29, 2014, 22:21:14 pm »
Yes typically waking less than an hour or so after BT is indicative of being OT. But I wouldn't really do any tweaking until you know he's feeling better. But I'm wondering if he's OT over all because he's doing a pretty full A time after a shorter nap? Have you read the 2-1 links?
My dreamed for Angel Baby DD (other than dreaded 40min naps) Born 4/30/16
Reflux, MSPI, Love my Spirited,textbook little munchkin DS Born 5/17/2012



**Siobhan**