7 mo NW/EW - EASY gone off track!

[Annabokobza]

Hi there,
Looking for advice on if or how to tweak our EASY to stop this recent spate of NWs and EWs
For background, M is a very relaxed and contented little guy, an independent (thumb sucking) sleeper, was EBF for 4 months then combination fed since then. Started a mixture of traditional and BLW a month ago and he's now established on 3 good sized meals per day.
The problem is that every night he wakes up at a different time, though always sounding happy and chatting to himself rather than whinging/crying, and every night I try a different strategy. Sometimes I leave him to it, sometimes I BF, sometimes I give him a bottle, sometimes I rock him. Whatever I do, he'll almost never settle in my arms so I put him back in his cot and it'll take him 60-90 mins to fall back to sleep. It's as if he's just not tired any more. Last night he was awake 3-4.30am, but sometime it can be 5am and then he's up for the day. The sleep deprivation is starting to take its toll on me (and my marriage) but I can never plan the next day as I never know what time we'll be up and what time naps will be.
I'm back at work in 6 weeks and would love to have this sorted by then if possible. I also accept that this is probably just a phase and will sort itself out in time.

One thing I should mention is that he NEVER finishes a FF apart from at night. The most he'll take is 5oz and that's with a LOT of persuasion. So I'm maybe too quick to feed him when he wakes at night as I worry he's hungry.

The added problem I have is that my toddler sleeps 1-2.30pm each day so I'm always trying to engineer the babies naps to coincide with this so I get at least an hour off each day (for my sanity!) 2.30 til bedtime is too long a stretch for the baby with no nap so I aim for a tiny catnap (5-10 mins) if his lunchtime nap finishes earlier than 3. Otherwise we try and power through.

Our target EASY is:
- WU 6.30
- BF 7
- Breakfast 7.30/8
- Nap 9.15/9.30 til 11
- FF 11 (7oz)
- Lunch 12.30
- Nap 1.30 til 3
- FF 3 (7oz)
- Dinner 5.30
- Bath 6.30
- BF 6.45
- Bed 7

Yesterday's EASY went:
- WU 5 (for the day)
- BF 6
- Breakfast 7
- Nap 8-9.30
- FF (5oz) 10
- Lunch 12
- Nap 12.30-2.30
- FF (4oz) 2.30
- Catnap 5-5.10
- BF 5.15 (offered as earlier FF was only half finished but didn't want much)
- Dinner 5.30
- Bath 6.30
- BF 6.45
- Asleep 7.10
- PLAYTIME!!! 3.10 (left him for 20 mins but didn't settle, just happy chirping!)
- Bottle 3.30 (8oz) then put him back in cot but still playing so changed nappy just in case
- Asleep at 4.30 after 10 mins of rocking
- WU 6.30 happy as larry

Any advice very welcome!

[Lindsay27]

Hi hun - if he is happy and chatting during those NWs that typically suggest he's a little UT.  What do you think about pushing those A times to 3.15hr?  That should help push your day out a little bit too and hopefully resolve the EW.

[Annabokobza]

I didn't think to try that but may well do. I've always worried about OTness so never thought he may be UT in fact!

So far today has been:
- WU 6.30
- BF 6.45
- Breakfast 7.30
- Nap 8.50-9.50 (would never have made it to 3 hrs!)
- FF 10.30 (4oz)
- Lunch 12.15
- Nap 12.45-2.55 (had I resettle him at 1.15 but went back to sleep easily)
- FF 3.45 (2oz!!!)

What time would you put him to bed?

[Lindsay27]

I would try a 6/6:30 BT

[Annabokobza]

I'm just scared that if I put him to bed an hour earlier than usual we'll be up for the day tomorrow at 5am!
I'll try 6.30 and see what happens!

[Lindsay27]

A general rule it to try to keep their day to 12/13hrs max - longer than that and they begin to get OT which will only perpetuate an EW.

[Annabokobza]

Update: he went to sleep at 6.50 last night very easily (like always) but woke even earlier than usual at 3.45. He'd had very little milk yesterday so I have him a bottle height he drained. He then didn't settle by himself so I changed and rocked him and he slept 4.30-5.30 though v restlessly and was then up for the day :-/

Any advice from anyone on how to play it today and get this back on track, bearing in mind I also have a toddler at home and have had less than 5 hours sleep myself and could do with a break!!!

Thanks :-)

[BabyY]

Hi Anna - is M hitting any milestones? My son went through something similar at 7.5 months and it was a combination of milestones and early 8 month sleep regression. We are still working through several issues but 2 quick learnings.

 A) it might be time to reassess the EASY, specifically extending A times and dropping some naps. Even cutting naps by 30 minutes (3 hrs to 2.5) helped.  I also found that when extending A times, my LO who's on a firm EASY would begin yawning right on cue at his regular bedtime, but if engaged, could pull through a few extra minutes. Maybe try reading an extra book/sing a song?

B) be careful about introducing/increasing night feeds. My LO seemed to resettle only by nursing and before I knew it, my fully night feed weaned baby had moved a full feed down to the night. It's tough I know to give mind to AP when you are exhausted and nothing else seems to be working, but just wanted to share.

[Annabokobza]

Thanks so much for your reply, I really appreciate it.
We've recently moved to a target 3 hour A time (from 2.5/2.75 hrs) and a 2 nap schedule which works out well on days when he's had a decent night's sleep and woken up at a reasonable time, but on days like today which started at 5.3am (after a long but happy NW 3.45-4.30) it's too long a day with only 2 naps and he was exhausted and grouchy a lot of the day, which is not his usual style at all.
I can't easily identify any milestones though he may be working on crawling/standing without my realising. Teething may also be playing a part, but then I figured he'd wake at night unhappy, rather than happily chatting to himself, which he does (very loudly in my room!)
It's a bit of a vicious cycle with these very long days caused by EW which I'm not sure how to break.
I try my best to adopt AP practices but take your point about automatically offering a night feed when it may not really be needed. The last two nights I have him a bottle at 3/4am which he drained (7/8oz) but will Ty and resettle him in another way tonight if/when he wakes up.
Thanks again for your thoughts!

[Annabokobza]

Just realised you meant AP as accidental parenting, not attachment parenting, haha!

[Lindsay27]

How are the naps with the longer A times?  Those EWs do throw the days for a loop, so you have a few options...1 being an early BT to keep the day as close to 12/13hrs (while pushing the A times) and the other is to see if he'll take a short CN in the evening (car or stroller?) to get him through to BT.

[Annabokobza]

Really good of you to check in, thank you.
Last night was slightly better than recently, at least by our standards with a NW 4-5am. I resisted feeding him as he seemed happy enough and he resettled himself. I then woke him at 7am.

Today has been like this:
BF 7am
Breakfast 8am
Nap 10am (went down easily & I woke him after an hour)
FF 11am (5oz so maybe smaller brekkie worked a bit?)
Lunch 12.30
Nap 1.50-3.10 (he couldn't make it to 2pm as was exhausted (OT?) and cried before I got him down. He then woke after 35 mins and I ended up BFing/holding him for the rest of his nap to keep him asleep as he was a bit restless)
Dinner 5.30pm
Bath 6pm
BF 6.20
EBT 6.40

This afternoon he was v tired from about 5pm but I guess he'll get used to the new regime in time.

Fingers tightly crossed for tonight!!

[Lindsay27]

If it were me hun I wouldn't cap that morning nap.  I think he needs to do some catching up from OT so I would let him nap if he needs it - preferably 2 x 1.5hr naps is ideal.