9mo. already making 2-1 transition??

[mama_tutu]

We've been having trouble with my 9 mo DD for a month... NW at least once a night, irratic times, always has to BF to go back to sleep. (We recently moved and she is now sharing a room with her 2.5 yo sister... we APOPed at first to keep the crying to a min and the toddler asleep but now we created a habit). Regardless of the NW, we were on a 3.5ish hour EASY, with two 1.5-2 hour naps (we'd cap the afternoon to keep a decent BT hour).

Well this weekend, two days in a row, she completely refused her afternoon nap. The second day, I tried waking her early from morning nap so she would still be tired for the second, but again, she just played and played until she got upset. We finally just got her up because it was too late at that point for a nap. I thought BT was going to be AWFUL, but it wasn't. Yesterday, her EASY looked like this:

8:30 - awake
12:30 - nap
2:30 - activity
7:30 - BT

She slept until 7:30 this morning, with one short NW around 2:00 AM. Today, I tried another 4 hour A time. So far, our day has looked like this:

7:30 - awake
11:30 - nap
1:30 - awake

Guess I'll have to do an extra early BT?? My real question however is am I crazy for thinking she is transitioning to a 1 nap day already?? or is this just a phase, and should I figure out a way to make 2 naps happen?? She has been such a mystery to me lately!!

[mama_tutu]

How bout an update?

After some big yawns, I decided to try for that second nap again today. Laid her down at 4:30... played and fussed until 5:00, then she slept until 5:30. Did our usual evening of playtime, dinner, then bedtime routine. Laid her down a little past 8:00. She went to sleep quickly, but was awake and MAD about it by 8:30. It took us an hour of rocking/sh-patting/PUPD to get her back to sleep (all the while, keeping the toddler sister up an hour past her bedtime). I don't know if that short afternoon nap was a good thing (because we're dealing with major OT... like days worth) or a bad thing (I should have just worked toward a super early 5:30ish BT and left her down for the night).

I swear... this kid makes me feel like I've never done this baby thing before. Wearing. me. out.

[Kellyjs]

I would keep trying to offer the second nap for a while yet hun. DD started the transition early too at 8.5mo but we kept offering that second nap for as long as we could. At least that way she got some quiet time I always thought.

It does mean the day gets longer however when they do take the second nap. When they don't, EBT is key.

What I would do is make sure that first nap doesn't go over 1.5hrs. Then you can offer the second nap around 3.5hrs after wu from that first nap. You can cap,the nap so BT doesn't get too late.

So something like this:
Wu
A 4hrs
S 1.5hrs
A 3.5hrs
S 30mins
A 2.5/75 hrs
BT

Think the above adds up to around a 12hr day, but this may need to be pushed out more in time. It may be that your LO can handle a slightly longer A to bed than I mentioned above too but it's trial and error.

On the plus side, at least you know she's capable of 2hr naps when she does eventually transition to 1 nap!

Here's a really useful link for you to have a read through. The one linked within this one about the when, how and the bumps was a godsend to me when we went through it x
From 2 to 1 nap transition (10-12m and older)

[mama_tutu]

Thank you so much for your help!! I do think those few days of refusing her aft nap were a fluke (thank goodness)... I bet we'll be making the transition sooner, rather than later, but hopefully we'll be closer to the 12 mo. mark. Thanks to your EASY suggestion our day has looked like this:

6:45 - wu
10:00 - am nap (she was so tired after last night's late BT of 9:30, then her usual NW, then up by 6:45... no way she was making a 4 hr A)
11:30 - I capped her nap here to preserve the pm nap
3:15 - pm nap... a little later than 3.5 hours because big sister was still napping in their room.

It's 4:30 now - still sleeping. Will prob cap at 1.5 hrs again (4:45) to preserve BT (which I'll probably shoot for 7:45ish).  But is a 13 hour day too long? 

[Kellyjs]

Nope, a 13hr day is fine. I probably wouldn't go much above this but it is very common for a LO to do a 13hr day especially throughout the transition.

Keep us posted and pop back if you need your easy tweaking again. There's also a great thread on top of the naps board where people post when they're going through the transition too. It's a great source of help! I found it invaluable when DD was going through it x

Anyone want to talk about the 2-1 transition #27

[mama_tutu]

I will definitely bookmark those links! Thank you!

Last night she had an AWFUL time going to sleep... she went down for naps great, but just screamed and scream at BT. Took us at least an hour to get her down. Then she had another 2am NW, then up for the day at 6.  That's only a 9 hour night, WITH a NW. That's short, right? This has been happening for almost 6 weeks now. I have no idea what to adjust to help her start sleeping better. I know I'm getting off topic for this nap board, though.

Thank you for listening. I love this community so much! Even my husband asks "what does that mom forum say??" when we're having an issue with one of our girls. Have a wonderful day!!

[MasynSpencerElliotte]

My DH asks the same thing! Just out of curiosity, have the nights after the second nap refusal been better than the two nap ones? Has your lo been on the lower end for sleep needs? It is totally possible to be doing the 2-1 at this age (so far mine did it at 11, 10 & 7.5 months respectively!) and more likely for a lsn baby. Might be worth trying to go back and forth between one nap and two just to see if the nights improve at all. Of course there can always be other causes like teeth and development too!

[Kellyjs]

That is a short night hun, doubt it's OT with those naps so I'm going to ask the same as Heidi.. Are the nights better when she refused the second nap? I know you said it was ok once.

[mama_tutu]

Hi Masyn! Thanks for jumping in...

The night after her first one nap day was closer to 12 hours, but she still had a short NW. The second night was close to 12 hours too, but the OT set in (she ended up awake from 1-8pm bc we had a family dinner we couldn't miss) and she had a long, 2 hr NW. Both nights she just crashed during her BT nursing (very rare for her) because she had such a long A time. So, kind of hard to say if it was better or not? Longer, but still NWs, especially that second night was rough.

Today has looked like this...

6am - WU, dozed off during nursing until 6:30.
9:30 - 10:15 - short nap... not sure if I kept her up to late or put her down too early. Her tired signs are nonexistent... always have been.
1:30 - 2:50 -  second nap
6:30 - Bedtime... went down on her own without a fuss! I'm nervous about it being so early... if she has another 9 hour night, that means we're starting our day at 3am. :/ But I'm super glad we didn't have an hour of screaming! She cried out around 20/30 minutes after falling asleep, but she settled right back in.

She doesn't have any teeth yet, so that's always a possibility, but it's been 6 weeks!! I figured we would at least see one trying to erupt by now if that were the case.  Could be developmental, as she started pulling up on everything and working on her cruising skills. But again... 6 weeks! I just wish I knew what to adjust to help her STTN again!

[Kellyjs]

How it go last night hun? That looks like a good day actually. Yep, she's taking an UT nap first thing, but that next A with a longer nap looks great. That's all part of the 2-1, 1 shorter nap and one longer nap whichever way round works best.

If the night was good, I'd be tempted to repeat that day exactly for a few days and see what happens?

[mama_tutu]

Well... it was interesting. Normal 1:15-2:00 NW. Then up again at 4:45, and was NOT interested in going back down until a decent hour. After almost an hour of nursing and rocking in the dark, she was just playing around and I needed to change her diaper of course. So, up we went! Another hour later (6:45) she crashed on my shoulder in the living room, so I laid her back down. It's 8:30 and she's still sleeping, so I'm debating on what to do. Wake her and try for a 2 nap day? or let her sleep and go for a 1 nap day? Oh, decisions, decisions. Maybe one day her day will be predictable!! How do you suggest handling those super early wakings?

[mama_tutu]

She woke up a 9 am... So I pushed her to a 4hr A and put her down at 1:00. Went down without a fuss and slept until 2:15. I was sure hoping she would make it to 3:00, so we could maybe have a 7:00 BT, but looks like 6:15 it is (or as close as we can get... Supposed to go to dinner for DHs birthday tonight. Of course.

[MasynSpencerElliotte]

Ugh...these things always happen when plans are made huh? Hope the night goes (went??) well. Personally I might have pushed the nap later with such a late wake up!

[mama_tutu]

I probably should have... I just didn't know if doing longer than 4 hours of A would just cause OT. She was getting pretty fussy by that point. We didn't get her in bed until 7:15 yesterday evening. She crashed during her BT nursing. Was up screaming around 10:30... took another hour to get her back to sleep. Then up again at either 4:15 or 4:45... I can't remember. I got her back down around 5:45, but she had woken up her big sister, who then woke her back up (we recently downsized to a 2 bdrm apartment, and the girls are sharing. At first we thought it wasn't going to be as bad as we expected. We stand thoroughly corrected).  I kept thinking she was going to settle again, but it's 6:30 and she just started talking and playing so I went in and we're up for the day.  DH is laying down with big sister so she'll go back to sleep.

I'm so exhausted. I just don't know what to do... nobody in this house is sleeping well. At least when they are awake so much as a newborn you have the hope that they'll eventually grow out of it. At least with a growth spurt, teething, illness or even a sleep regression, you know it's for a short time, then things will go back to normal. What do you do when this craziness IS the normal?? There is no foreseeable end in sight... no "if we can just get through this illness..." or "when that tooth finally erupts..."  I am just so tired and frustrated.  Thank you for listening... It doesn't help that we just moved 6 hours away from all our family, where we know no one, so my husband can go to grad school.

[Kellyjs]

Poor you hun, sending you lots of ((hugs)). It's hard with no additional support around isn't it?

I found the 2-1 particularly tough. 3-2 was a breeze in comparison. She just dropped it on her own! I promise it will get better, then you can go back to the teething and/or wonder weeks 

IMO, here OT before the nap was a lot easier to deal with than an UT nap so I just kept pushing. It really does depend how your LO can handle OT. I knew with mine, the more I pushed her before her nap, the better the nights went as OT before bed causes major issues. I think if you get a late wu again, I'd be tempted to push it a bit further as Heidi said.

With a 6.30wu, you can always repeat what you did the other day with a short am nap, then longer pm nap? We did some one nap and some two nap days all depending on when she wu in the morning.