Author Topic: Trying to sort out 11 month old for first time...HELP  (Read 892 times)

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Offline newmum872

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Trying to sort out 11 month old for first time...HELP
« on: September 11, 2014, 21:01:59 pm »
Hello!

My first post here in a few years. I used baby whisperer stuff with my older dd and all worked well. My son on the other hand has been rather spoiled until now being breastfed to sleep and being brought into bed with me after waking (I guess I felt that I didn't have the time to sit in darkened rooms shushing him second time around so resorted to quick milk fixes). Now at 11 months as you can imagine he wakes frequently for comfort feeds to settle back to sleep both at night and for naps. I am feeling ready to do something about this but am not sure where to begin?!?  I have tried to not feed him down for naps over the last few days but I am not sure if I should be picking him up to comfort him when crying. Any thoughts on how to approach the nights? He usually just takes one nap each day around 12 or 1 and sleeps for 45 min to 1.5 hours. At night he sleeps from 8ish to 7 or 8. Any thoughts would be helpful!!

Thank you!!!

Offline lauradj

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Re: Trying to sort out 11 month old for first time...HELP
« Reply #1 on: September 12, 2014, 03:47:04 am »
Welcome back!  It's never too late to start but it may take a bit more 'stickwithitness' to get things where you want them to be. First things first, you want to make sure you stick with the order of EASY, which will help you avoid feeding your LO to sleep.  It may be a difficult habit for both of you to break, so be prepared for some difficult days/weeks ahead.
Just to get you started, I've included the link for PU/PD which you may find very helpful.  Something Tracy really emphasised was that if you can switch off with a partner every 2-3 days, then you get a break but your child doesn't get confused/stimulated but a new person coming in halfway through your attempt at PU/PD for that night.  She also suggests that if you feel you are more likely to cave in, send your partner/spouse in, if they can stick it out. 
I've also included the link on mantra cries, so you can remember the difference between "I'm not tir-zzzzzzzzzzz!" and "I really need you Mommy!"

PU/PD for 3 month old - info from consult with Tracy
What’s a mantra cry?


Offline newmum872

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Re: Trying to sort out 11 month old for first time...HELP
« Reply #2 on: September 13, 2014, 04:26:59 am »
Thanks for the reply! Yes lots of things to work on! A couple more questions... I thought pu/pd was for babies younger than 11 months is this not true? I am worried it sort of keeps him awake. Also i am starting by stopping feeding him to sleep for naps and at night but am still just feeding him back to sleep when he wakes. How do other people get rid of the night wakings?! I mean should I progress by cutting out all night feeds or just for the first half of the night initially etc?! Many thanks!!

Offline lauradj

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Re: Trying to sort out 11 month old for first time...HELP
« Reply #3 on: September 13, 2014, 21:12:44 pm »
If your baby can stand, you remove the PU part because they'll settle more quickly in their bed.  If DS stands up, gently lay him back down (one hand behind the knees, the other behind his head).  Tell him in a soothing voice that it's ok, he's just going to sleep.  You can also, calmly and quietly, recognized his feelings ei. "I know you're feeling frustrated/tired right now, that's ok.  You'll feel better with some sleep".  Keep at this, even when he's only able to sit up because he's so pooped.  Eventually he will just stay down and nod off.  The important thing is that he knows you're there to support him.  You may need to stay until he's completely asleep the first few days/nights but over a few days you'll be able to slowly fade that out, moving further from the crib.   
With the night wakings, I would recommend you not feed him at all when he wakes because this becomes a prop.  If he's in the habit of always being fed when he wakes, this will likely be a difficult one to break but worth it for both his and your sleep.  You'll need to PU/PD for this as well (minus the PU, as above ^^)Make sure he's getting enough food and milk during the day; 3 meals, maybe a healthy snack or two and 15-20oz of homogenized milk or breast milk.  If you're hitting all these and he still wants to be fed when he wakes, it's definitely becoming a habit. 
Let me know if you have more questions and keep me posted how it's going! 


Offline newmum872

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Re: Trying to sort out 11 month old for first time...HELP
« Reply #4 on: September 24, 2014, 11:23:24 am »
Hi! Thanks for your response. I think we are making some progress.  He is going down for naps and at bedtime without the milk prop. I agree that milk is a prop at night but should I cut it out cold turkey or do it gradually. For the past couple nights I decided I wouldn't feed him for his first wake up of the night which has been going well. Should I now just not feed until the morning?! Thanks!