Daycare and Transition from 3 Hr EASY to 3.5 or 4 Hr EASY - 19 week old

[Kathrynh29]

Hi,

I am wondering how to transition my DS from 3 Hr EASY to 3.5 or 4 Hr EASY while in daycare. 

My DS is 19 weeks old (born 37w3d) and still exclusively breastfed or EBF.  Until two nights ago he was STTN from the DF but since then he wakes 2x-3x per night shouting for attention, not hungry, just wants someone to come say hello, replace pacifier, etc...  He is completely capable of putting himself back to sleep when he wakes up in the middle night because he's been doing it for about 6 weeks.  (After I went back to work at 12 weeks, I couldn't get up to soothe him back to sleep when he wanted attention vs. when he awoke for a feed.) 

Also within the past few days he is not sleeping great at daycare ... only sleeping for 20-30 minutes, maybe 45 at the most per every 3 hrs.  A few weeks ago he was napping 45min -1.5 hr every 3 hrs.  Sorry for the rambling ... just wanted to give information if needed. 

I've been noticing on the weekends that he will stay awake 1:45 to 2 hrs now so am wondering if it's time to transition him.  He also has somewhat dropped his 1st morning nap. 

I gave daycare a copy of our 3 hour EASY and they stick to the eating times but not so much to the awake and sleep times. But they do still have him on the general E, A, then S routine.  I had to give up the control and just hope for the best and it's been going well until the past few days.   

Our EASY is:
E-7:00
A-7:30
S-

E-9:30
A-
S-

E -12:30
A-
S-

E-3:30
A-4
S-5:00 (after I pick him up at 5).

E-6:00
A-6:30
cat nap, hang out, etc...
bath 7:30
E-8:00

E/Dream Feed - 10:30

Please let me know if you need additional information. 

Should I even try or just give up since I have "no" control over his day four days a week at daycare. 

My child is generally a pretty happy, go-lucky, mellow baby.  But the past few days he has been irritable, crying over nothing, and just fussy.  We did also start physical therapy recently to treat his torticollis.  But even at PT he was laughing and smiling (but when he was done, he was done both physically and mentally). 

Thank you in advance!

[Kathrynh29]

Sorry, forgot to fill in the EASY completely.  (And this is more accurate for when he was not in daycare).

Our EASY is/was:
E-7:00
A-7:30
S- (this is the one he's dropped but he used to be asleep at 8:30 before I went back to work)

E-9:30
A- 10
S- 11

E -12:30
A- 1
S- 2

E-3:30
A-4
S-5:00 (after I pick him up at 5).

E-6:00
A-6:30
cat nap, hang out, etc...
bath 7:30
E-8:00

E/Dream Feed - 10:30

[Erin M]

Hi hun, just noticed this post totally got missed!  Are you still having trouble?

[athenasmom]

Can I listen in? I have a similar situation although my LO is just 3 months old but she started having wonky naps in the am and I think she is ready for a push in her a time.

[Kathrynh29]

Yes, I am still here.  Thank you for reaching out! 

He continues to wake during the night and his naps are generally 30-45 minutes. 

I need general help with adjusting his routine from 3 to either 3.5 or 4 hours.  He is in daycare four days a week and home 3 days a week.  Any suggestions on how to accomplish this would be greatly appreciated.  Should I try to adjust his routine on the three days that I have him at home gradually over the course of a month or so or do it all at once?   

Also, should I try to combine the 6 p.m. and 8 p.m. feed at this point?  If so, should I add a bit more to his bottle and time to his nursings to make up for the ounces lost when combining the two feeds?

Sorry for all the questions ... just would love some help!!!  The EASY schedule has really worked for us and would like to keep it that way!!!

Thank you in advance!!!
Kathryn

[goldmom]

For DS1 and DD, during the transition at 4 months, I wrote down what time the bottles should be given to them for their babysitter to follow, so that we slowly were able to adjust to a 4 hour EASY. DS1 was mostly short napping at that time, but he easily transitioned to the 4 hour easy for the E, and then we worked on naps after that. DD also transitioned pretty well with her babysitter. I made sure to give more (EBM) in each bottle since we were essentially dropping one of them, so we went from 3 during the day to 2. With DS2, we are slowly starting to stretch him out now to a 4 hour EASY, but it's been slower going.

[Erin M]

I've had all of my kids in daycare at one time or another and it's really challenging trying to get their schedules in sync.  Mine would never nap well at daycare, which led to rather overtired kiddos at the end of the day.  But, with what you say (short naps, awake in the middle of the night for no real reason), it really sounds like he needs a bump in A time.  Some people prefer to stretch their A times all at once, some like to do it really gradually, just pushing one at a time over the course of several days.  I'd say that since you've only got total control 3 days out of the week, I'd probably try to push all of them by about 15 minutes -- and then if you're having success, I'd try another 15 minutes the following week (I'm assuming he's home with you 3 days in a row?). 


Now, the feedings can be tricky, especially since you're breastfeeding - not all babies can stretch their feed times at the same time as their A times - some just need more frequent feeds regardless of their A time - which is ok and you'll be on more of a EAESAE sort of routine.  It's totally doable, it just means that you might end up feeding before a nap sometimes.  I would definitely aim for combining the 6PM and 8PM feedings - increase your bottles for your bottle feedings, and your body should adjust ok for the BFs.  How does your day break down in terms of BFs/bottle feeds?  Formula in the bottles or breast milk? 

What do you think?

And Suzanna, I think you could totally be ready for a bump in A time -- but definitely start your own post and I promise you'll get some eyes on it. 

[Kathrynh29]

Thank you for the responses!!!

Sorry for the delayed response ... I was out of town and now am dealing with sick baby! 

Let me make sure I understand.  For now, push the A times to 2 hours awake and keep the feedings at every 3 hours?  Then, once he's adjusted to the A times, then push to a 3.5 then 4 hour feed time?  Should I wait to do that when he starts solids in a month?  I feel like I am so behind compared to what I read in the BW books!  We are just behind but oh well.

Yes, he's with me three days in a row so I can make this work. 

To answer a few of your questions re: feeding.  He drinks only breastmilk.  Our bottle feed v. breastfeed breakdown is somewhat complicated but it's worked for us.  On the weekends, I pretty much breast feed him at each feed except the 8 p.m. and Dreamfeed.  During the work week, I nurse him at 7:00 a.m. (30-40 min), 6 p.m.(30-40 min), and 8:00 p.m. (15 min).  At 8 p.m., in addition to nursing for 15 min., he also drinks a 4 oz bottle so my DH gets to spend some quality time with him as well.  During the day, at 9:30, 12:30, and 3:30 he drinks a 5 oz. bottle.  Then a 3 oz bottle at the Dreamfeed.  I have NO idea how much he eats when he nurses - he is a very, very slow eater and always has been - but I would image btw 4-5 ounces with the exception of the 8 p.m. feed. 

Since I'm dropping the 6 p.m. feed, should I add 3/4 to an 1 oz to each bottle during the day to avoid a night feed? 

Thank you!



 

[Erin M]

So yes, basically work on pushing A time to 2 hours but don't worry about pushing the feeds if you do to think he ready for it -- it's actually totally normal for fb babies to not be able to make it to 4 hours between feedings until they are also getting some solids too.  There are plenty of babies on here who haven't been able to go that long between feedings at your lo's age.  Definitely add the ounces at the rest of the feedings so it evens out.  The one thing I'd watch for with the A time increase is that he doesn't get too OT - so if you keep him up 2 hours and he short naps the nap b/c of being overtired, then you'll need to keep things real low key and out him down after a shorter A time.  Some babies are better with it than others!