show I give up breast?

[duoduo]

yes, too many bottles, my 4-week-old boy doesn't like breast any more, he either refuses to latch or latch on and pretend to sleep --- doesn't suck. let him cry for 2 hours in the morning, eventually he was so tired and fall in sleep after breast, in the afternoon, he would take breast, both sides 2 times and still not contented, cry and cry, had to add some formula, then the same thing at night.

let him have bottle at night as I need rest, in day time try to feed on demand, but in the morning,  especially 8:00am ~11:00am, cry-->change diaper-->pretend to sleep --> cry --> poop again, or sucks for half minutes, fall in sleep, put him down, cry again, when the milk comes, he pushes out my nipple and cry.

next day, same pattern,I already started taking pill to help with milk supply, but nothing has been changed

does it hurt if I just let him cry? what can I do? I feel so frustrated, and thinking maybe should give up breast feeding?

he is tried, so do I.
he is still crying, hurts me too.

[jessmum46]

Hi, hugs, you sounds pretty stressed about things.  What is your long-term plan for feeding?  Are you hoping to breast feed exclusively?  How often are you offering bottles and is it expressed milk or formula? 

Really this is such early days if you are wanting to breastfeed exclusively you need to let him suckle at the breast as often as he wants for as long as he wants, that is the best way to tell your body to make more milk.  Every oz of formula you give is an oz that your body is missing out on receiving the signal to make, so your supply will drop further.  The night feeds especially at this age are absolutely vital for building and maintaining a good milk supply so giving bottles of formula overnight with no stimulation to the breast will really have an negative impact.  It's entirely up to you how you choose to feed your baby, exclusive breastfeeding certainly is not the right choice for everyone, but if it's something you want to do then you will probably need to work on cutting down the formula and maybe pumping after each breastfeed to give your body extra signals to increase supply. 

About the crying.....when you say you let him cry for two hours where was he and what were you doing?  Were you trying to comfort him or settle him?  Was it just that he was crying for a long period and was hard to settle? (sorry we may have lost something in translation). 

[*Ali*]

You already have great advice from pp so I'll just add hugs and await your response to pp's questions

[duoduo]

I was completely wrong! I thought I don't have low supply issue, but it has been turned out that I do.
I want to breast feed my boy as long as possible, his sister had 10 months.
and I also want to be a Mom of a happy baby, so here are what I do:
1. double the doze of pill
2. feed my boy on demand
3. always give him breast 1st, if he doesn't like it, fine, give him bottle.

I don't want to let him cry anymore, I tried 2 times, when he refused nipple, I let him cry by himself, it was a hard time to both him and I , I would never do it again. and like last time, I let him cry for a while, he was so mad and the routine had been messed up, that's how it lasts for 2 hours. no, it didn't work and it shouldn't be like that.

don't give him formula? impossible, he wants it, he will cry until u feed him
don't give him formula at night? yes, I am trying, which means I have less and shorter sleep, like last night, he woke up every 45 mins,I am tired, and hoping by doing this can increase my supply soon.

[Katet]

It sounds like you have supply issues if he is taking formula & not the bottle

If he has been crying for more than a couple of minutes he will be using lots of energy & then will be tired & more hungry,  which makes it harder to such on the breast & that is why he will prefer the bottle - it takes more energy to feed from the breast to so a tired baby will like the bottle more.

 I'm no expert, but honestly if you want to BF him as long as possible at 4wks he could well be having a growth spurt & it wouldn't be unreasonable for him to want to feed almost hourly.  Hard as it is with a toddler, really if you want to be on the breast I'd only offer formula as a really last resort especially as the PP said at night... sadly when you want to sleep the most is when it is best to feed the most.

 I was told with DS1 that at 3 week old when I had to offer the  bottle  (due to a damaged nipple)  it was better to offer expressed breast milk rather formula as even one bottle of formula would mess with supply esp as there are so many growth spurts in the first 6 weeks of of life.

[jessmum46]

I'm glad you've realised that leaving him to cry alone isn't the answer.  Tracy believed that could break the bond of trust between LO and caregiver, not to mention as pp said that for a tiny baby crying takes a huge amount of energy so will really not help the situation.  At just a few weeks he cries because he has a need - hunger, comfort, tired, not because he's being difficult . Can you start expressing to help build your supply?  And offer that in a bottle rather than so much formula? 

How is his weight gain and pees/poops?

[*Ali*]

There are some further ideas in this FAQ on I dressing supply. I'm worried I may have low milk supply

I agree with pps that leaving him to cry is not a good option. I hope you find a gentler way to get him back to the breast.