How to wean the dummy when baby sis still has one?

[Gobolinosmum]

Hey 

Just thinking about this and panicking a little...

Little man (now 33 months) only ever had the dummy for sleeps and only had it in the first place because his reflux was so bad. I was planning to be rid of it by 3 (this coming feb). Then baby sister arrived (now 8 months) and her reflux is even worse  so she has a dummy in the daytime if she wants one. Little man thinks this is highly unfair and often wants his in the daytime too. I often give in as it makes my life so much easier. He never has it out in public but will quite often have it around the house now if he's having a tough time developmentally. He's stiiiillll teething his molars too so it really helps on the ouchy days.

I'm a bit concerned about his speech though as it's never been that clear anyway and his renewed dummy addiction isn't helping. I really would like to ditch his dummy soon but I can't bring myself to take baby sis's dummy away yet as it really helps with the reflux.

Is it unfair to take his but not hers???

I also have to admit I'm terrified of taking the dummies away...they make my life so much easier and I'm not sure how I'd manage without them...bad mummy 

[Buttonbobs]

Hi there, sorry we've missed you for a few days. Firstly I understand your fear of getting rid of the dummies, my DD still has hers but we are talking a lot about giving them to the dummy fairy at Christmas and that Father Christmas will bring her a special present for letting the fairy take the dummies.

I don't think it is unfair for your baby to have a dummy and ask your toddler not to have one. It sounds like you're not ready to get rid of it at sleep time yet though, is it just a day thing?

DD did always rely on her dummies a little more when she was teething. If you want to encourage better speech can you insist he takes it out when he is speaking to you. I do this with Dd, I say "i can't hear you with your dummy in, what was that you said?" And she will take it out and repeat. But now she is over her teething I do limit the dummies to her bedroom completely. She has a little pot in there that she puts them in when she wakes up.

If it is mainly the daytime you are worried about I think you can explain to him that dummies in the daytime are for babies only and he has to leave his in his room. You may have tantrums as a result and I guess then it is a case of being consistent and using whatever methods you would usually to deal with his upset as and when needed.

What do you think? Does he have any other comfort items, a cuddly toy or similar that you can let him have in the daytime instead when he feels a need for extra comfort?

[Gobolinosmum]

Thanks! 

Yes, he does have to take it out to talk to me, otherwise I pretend I can't understand him  but he's so addicted!

I'm also scared to let it go as it's so handy for times like when I need a shower. I can put baby in the door bouncer where I can see her, then little Man has his dummy and watches a bit of telly in Mummy and Daddy's bed. I can fairly well guarantee that with the dummy in, he'll be so chilled out he'll not bother getting up to make trouble while I'm showering. Without the dummy though...anything could happen  Also handy when cooking dinner and he's tired!

I had been planning to do the "dummy fairy" thing at xmas too but I'm wondering whether I should wait until his 3rd birthday in february. He might understand it all a bit better by then and maybe not mind so much about losing it. In my dreams 

It does tend to give him bad breath though. Has anyone else noticed that about dummies??