Please help! My DS will not nap and it has resulted in a very OT baby.
He is 11 weeks old, exclusively bf, now nearly 13lb and a touchy baby, very easily overstimulated. He was 3.5 weeks premature (7lb 5 at birth) and had jaundice for 3 weeks when born, so I'm using his gestational age of 8 weeks for expected A times - he seems to be about 1 hr 15 mins.
I tried to start EASY with him at 5 weeks old, but he then caught a cold that lasted 3 weeks, then had his jabs, and so only just getting back on track. In the mean time, obviously some AP has been implemented.
On top of this, LO has reflux. We tried him on gaviscon at 6 weeks but was making him even worse for sleep because he had more trouble pooping and was constantly squirming to get his gas out. HV advised to stop the Gaviscon and just use manual methods to help, keeping him upright after feeds, his crib was already elevated etc.
In all honestly, the reflux seemed to have almost disappeared. I was still keeping him up for 10-15 mins after a feed, and hardly any sick was coming out of him. He seemed to have his 6 week growth spurt with 2 hourly bf, but continued eating this way after the spurt. I assume the smaller meals were helping his reflux.
So from about 6-10 weeks, he was getting 2-2.5 hourly bfs during the day, and going 4-4.5 hours at night,which seemed to be going fine. The main problem was that from having to keep him upright after his feeds, i began cuddling him after burping...when he was 6 weeks (3 weeks gestational), he would then fall asleep pretty quickly as he had a short A time. I know...AP. Whenever i lay him down 30 mins later (thinking his reflux would have passed) he then would wake up from not being cuddled any more. I don't think it was the reflux waking him as he wasn't usually being sick at this point, although I guess it could have been some silent reflux.
At night time i was feeding him, burping, then keeping him up on my chest for 30 mins before laying him in his crib and he would be fine. Sleeping well at night, which i know can be common in reflux babies.
Ok...onto the present day. For the last week i have been striving to get him back onto 3 hour EASY. I also think i had a problem with oversupply of milk and fast letdown which i have resolved this week,he is no longer pulling off the breast in a spray of milk choking , and his poos seem much better. He has taken quite well to the move back to 3 hourly feeds, i haven't really had to do anything to stretch out his feeds, couple of times i distracted him by waking round the house if say it had only been 2-2.5 hours since his last feed. However, his reflux is back with a vengeance. I assume because of the bigger less frequent feeds sitting in his tummy.
I also started trying to tackle the daytime sleeping in his cot in the nursery (not where he sleeps at night) as i can get the nursery very dark for the daytime naps but our bedroom is too bright. I had some success but i think the build up of his overtiredness is getting in the way. For example, if i catch him in his very short window, i can usually do his wind down (swaddle, singing Twinkle twinkle, white noise, closing blinds and then sitting cuddling him upright on my shoulder ), put him in the cot when almost asleep and then i keep my hand on him with pressure on his side to get him through the jolts. He has a very strong startle reflex still so i feel this is necessary. About 50% of the time he makes it through his 20 min transition into deep sleep fine. At this point i leave him alone and close the door. I would say in 99% of the times he then wakes at 30 mins - I think OT has to be the reason. The times that he doesn't make it past 20 mins I try to settle him in the cot but usually end up having to pick up to calm him, put him back in cot when almost asleep but then he usually cries and will not settle.
If he makes it past 30 mins, he now seems to always wake at the end of the sleep cycle at 45-50 mins and will not resettle. I then get him up, do some A time and then start again with the next cycle of EASY. The problem is that we often run out of A time before his next sleep, so then he ends up being sick from his reflux as it is too soon for him to lie down after eating. So then he wakes up and gets very OT as the day goes on.
I know the key thing must be for me to try and get his first morning nap right so that he sleeps for the full 1.5 hours and we end up doing EASY instead of EASAEASY.
The next problem is that he now seems to be waking more in the night. Before EASY, we were putting him to bed about 8.30pm and he typically would go 4-5 hours, bf, go another 4 hours and then from about 5am would start waking every 45 mins (think this is EMW?). Since EASY, he has been OT most evenings, so i have been putting him to bed at 5.30-6.30pm. He then wakes up 45 mins later wanting food because he is often too OT to eat properly before bed. I have been dreamfeeding him when we go to bed at 10pm. He is waking A LOT!
I can post some EASY schedules for the past couple of days if that helps. I am pretty sure it is overtiredness as he gets so worked up. Being a touchy baby i have really dumbed down the stimulation all day for the last 2 days. It has helped him not get to the OT stage of screaming before i try and get him to sleep, but not helped the naps lengthen and not helped the nighttime sleep.
How am i best to tackle this? Currently when he wakes at 5am i keep trying to get him resettled in his crib and then he wakes every 45 mins. I have been so tired myself from the poor night sleep that i have fallen back to sleep myself and don't actually know if he goes back to sleep from the EMWs. I think he possibly sleeps from 5-6ish and then after that waking he is just lying in his crib until i get up (when he next hunger cries either at 7 or 8am). Should i be staying awake myself to watch his behaviour? Should i just stay the day at 5am one day and see what happens?
Another thing is that he seems fine to self settle at night now, when i put him back into his crib he is always drowsy and then gurgles and fidgets and manages to sleep fine. I feel that this is asmall victory at least!
Ijust need a plan really as i am at a load what to do. Do i need to tackle the reflux again before starting EASY? How do i tackle the OT in the interim to avoid further cementing the AP?
A lot of questions I know, there seem to be so many things that could be the reason that I am unsure in which order to tackle them!
