quick question about nap length

[LovelyLilyandJack]

 

[AMJ]

Ladies I need your help ASAP please. DD had a 1hr nap yesterday (thanks DH ) and today she is up at 4:15am (BT yesterday was 6:50/55pm). I left her in the crib till 6:30am in hopes that she would fall back asleep but she started calling me and it was obvious that she was up for good. I have no clue what to do with her nap and BT today. I would like to get her till 7pm if possible. Please help!!

[jessmum46]

If it were me I would have done normal nap time and length, possibly 15 mins earlier/longer if really struggling but not more. And then EBT if needed. Quickest way to get back on track here was not to over-compensate for a short night and make up lost sleep with nights not nap time x

[LovelyLilyandJack]

I would do an hour at 12.30ish I think. Definitely no more.  Were you capping at 45 minutes before yesterday?  If so I'd actually do 45 minutes again today and do a slightly EBT (6.45?) if you think she's not coping.  If she EW today cos her nap was too long yesterday she probably needs  (and can handle) a tougher day today to get her back on track....

[LovelyLilyandJack]

Ha! Posted with Katherine - great minds and all that!

[AMJ]

Thank you thank you thank you ladies. I was thinking the same thing but needed your advice. I'll do that today.

[jessmum46]

Great we are all on the same page!!! Trust yourself, sounds like your instincts are great

[AMJ]

Thanks

[AMJ]

Hi we are still having short nights most of the time and sometimes NWUs. Her nap is 45m long most days but she is taking forever to fall asleep for both nap and BT and she is just impossible to wake up after the nap. She just can't open her little eyes. Yesterday I capped at 30m because she took a long time to fall asleep and she still slept only 10hrs20m with some stirring 2 nights in a row in the first part of the night( yesterday she had NWU for 1.5hrs in th second part of the night).She is acting tired and hyper at the same time before nap and BT, like really tired, but every time she tells me she is not tired and doesn't want to sleep and wants to play or read more books. Because of EWUs (5-5:30am)her days become long again( BT usually around 7-7:15). Are we back to OT/UT cycle?

Today she fell asleep pretty quick at nap time (in 15m which is good time for her) although she kept telling me that she is not tired and wanted to read more books. I woke her at 2:00 pm which made her nap 50m long.

P. S. Yey she had 11hr night! Finally. BT was 7:10pm and WU at 6:00am and she kept telling me again that she wasn't tired before bed. Now I know that I can't rely on her knowing if she is tired or not. This makes it even harder. Gosh I feel son bad puting her to sleep when she is asking me to play/read more etc.

[Maria14]

Hi AMJ,
I ve replied to your posts before.
My DD is 2 years 4 months and has had sleep issues for months.
She never has more than 11 hrs of sleep at night- regardless of what we do with routine- she has never slept for 12 hrs at night like a lot of kids do.
She has terrible NWs- 3 hrs easily- when OT and occasionally when she is having developmental leaps.
Only the other day I realised that no matter what I do with her nap- she will not tack on at night.
And like your DD she can be very hard to wake up from nap.
She is starting to refuse nap and then ends up OT on NND with NWs.
So I ve decided to let her have a nap for as long as she wants- usually she will sleep 1 hr 20 min and just accept that her nights will be short until she stops nap completely- even if this takes months.
Because I cannot deal with long NWs anymore. So her sleep just had to be spread over 24 hrs rather than aiming for long nights.
And if I have to put her to bed later on nap days so be it.
Also I think that it's ok for her to have a longish nap on days when she does nap to compensate for when she doesn't.
But solving her sleep issues has been the hardest thing for me.
She is now potty trained and wakes up at night for a wee most nights- which is yet another cause for wakening and then struggling to go back to sleep

[AMJ]

Hi Maria yes I remeber you and I remember that out LOs are very similar.  For DD though it is much worse having an uncapped nap then capping it. Her behaviour is much worse with a long nap/short night. Also for her I think 2-3hrs NWUs are usually UT and I think 30m-1.5hrs NWUs are OT. But again I might be wrong. 

With regards to 12hrs nights- we never ever had those either lol but I'm am still hopeful for 11hr nights. Yesterday she ended up having an 11hr night so that leaves me hopeful. I am pretty sure that it is a matter of finding her "sweet spot" and it is so worth it. This am she is so pleasant and happy that I just can't give up.

I am happy for you that you found what works for you though. It is so exhausting. Thank you for sharing

[LovelyLilyandJack]

Yay for the 11hr night! If on balance she's doing better with capping I'd stick with it cos it'll help her regulate at night with nice 11hr nights like that!  Are you going to stick with 45 minute naps for a bit then?

P.s. My LO has never done 12hr nights either,  though since he's basically stopped napping we do get the very occasional 11hr 45 night.  Like, once a month!

[AMJ]

Today, after an 11hr night I put her in the crib at 1:15 instead of 1:00. She was kinda hyper, surprisingly, but fell asleep at 2:00 so I gave her only 30m and will aim for a regular 7pm BT. On the days when she will have short nights I think I will stick with 45m or like you suggested before- crib at 1:00 and she can self regulate but up at 2:00.

Wow he is not napping anymore? At this point I completely understand you with regards to wanting him to drop the nap completely. I wish DD would just drop it too so we can have 11+hrs nights! Btw how do you do quiet time? In his room in a dark or with lights on? For how long?

[LovelyLilyandJack]

We get nap resistance starting from the moment I mention a nappy change after lunch  (used to be first step in nap preparation), so our quiet time is actually him watching tv  He has fallen asleep in front of the telly once or twice though, so I count it as self regulating still,  kind of.... He's not napping really,  now,  no.  He hasn't napped at home since he turned two really. Pretty much every 2-3 days we end up in the car after lunch and he'll often fall asleep if it's after 1 or 2ish, but that's all he gets now. I think he'd be fine with nothing if we never went anywhere.

Sounds like a good plan with your DD. If she starts to shorten her nights again I wouldn't be afraid of capping to 30 minutes either 

[AMJ]

That's grea, that's exactly what you were waiting for - no nap

Now I'm
Not sure about 30m. After yesterday's 30m she only slept 10hrs15m. Maybe she didn't need a nap at all but she was tired and took it. Who knows, right.