Hi there! I've posted previously on the sleep boards about my lo's naps or lack of!! Since then things have just gone from bad to worse and I don't know how to separate all out issues so I was hoping a fresh pair of eyes could help!
This is my third child - previous two were angel/textbook with a touch of spirited and were easy babies in every sense of the word and had great routines from day 1. Henry is ebf and so far seems to be a touchy/angel baby (is that an odd combination) who suffers with reflux but is medicated and seems to be coping ok.
We don't have much of a routine to speak of right now because of his inconsistent naps but he wakes at 7ish, will eat every three hrs have a little awake time and I'll try to put him down and that is where our problems begin. I have been aiming for a 7pm bedtime too but if you read on you'll see why that's not working octavo well! I am eager to start sleep training properly but I'm not ready to start before I'm sure I understand his needs! I would love your insights.
The main issues are
1 awake time. He starts showing sleepy signs after 45 minutes so I takes him for his wind down which lasts about 5-10 minutes and then put him in his cot awake. We have success with the first nap of the day where he can settle himself and stay asleep for 1.5-2hrs but honestly this has even been going wrong lately. The rest of the day is a write off where he can never settle himself. This seems like such a short awake time and I'm not confident enough to persevere with shush pat when I'm not sure his a times are right. My mum and mother in law keep telling me he'll sleep when he's tired and to just keep him up but all my instincts say he's easily over stimulated and this overtired but I just feel like I'm constantly either feeding him,trying to get him to sleep or holding him while he sleeps! With two other dd it's not practical!
2 prop. When he can't settle himself and shush pat doesn't work I usually pick him up to settle him but then he wakes up whenever i put him back down so nice created a bit of a prop I think by just holding hom to make sure he gets some sleep. I think he's now become too used to sleeping in my arms. I know I should change this using shush pat but again not confident if a times are wrong.
3 mantra cry. I do not want to let him CIO ever but I've been letting him moan/babble /mantra cry for up to 20 mins in an effort to self settle but should I leave him longer if he's not really getting upset? I'm also scared I'm misreading his cries and what I think is a mantra cry is actually a distressed cry and I'm letting him CIO.
4 bedtime. Bedtimes are non existent. I have dropped the bath to see if he's maybe overstimulated but no improvement so far. Best case scenario he falls asleep eating and I can just hold him til df when bizarrely he'll then sleep in cot beside bed until 7am. Worst (and most usual) he'll feed and then be awake for 3 hrs or longer and nothing can get him to sleep. Sometimes this can last even after df until 1, 2 or 5am! Last night he was awake from 3.15pm til midnight and then he would only sleep when being held. I fed him but I don't think hunger was the issue.
My husband has two weeks off work starting on Tuesday and I really want to take some time to tackle his sleep but don't know how/where to start! Any help or advice is greatly appreciated! I honestly finding it hard to brush my teeth most days never mind eat three meals and look after two young children as well as the baby! Going a little bit out of my mind here.
