Author Topic: Routine help pls (Read 3030 times)

Florena49 · « **on:** March 07, 2015, 07:22:10 am »

Cant seem to shift wu time and eliminate the night waking

We have had terrible nights, but that has been slowly resolved and now i think we have an issue with routine and i cant seem to move the wu time to 7 as it previously was.
When we had bad nights we did 7-12-7 routine and he settled for nap and bt brilliantly. So the nap has moved a little,but we still do set nap and set BT

Yesterday was

Wu 6.40
Nap 12.15-2.05 5.35A
bT 7.30. 5.35A

He was up 2pm in the night and wu at 6.45 am

He was being a nugget at BT when he is really tired he settles within minutes but recently he has been playing up at BT.
He has slept through the night twice do far, but not on this routine, one after a 40 min nap that ended at 3.30 and the other time when his nap was too early in the day.

Is he oT or need daytime sleep cutting? Or longer until BT, just cant work out

creations · « **Reply #1 on:** March 07, 2015, 08:59:22 am »

Hi

I think you have two options.
1. cap nap. Works for many LOs to preserve night length (not mine though!). Cap at 1hr 30 max
2. move nap time and BT later. Night becomes a little shorter but some LOs are well rested with a longer nap and shorter night (mine was). Move nap to 12.30 to encourage a good sleep. Move BT to 7.45/8pm expect WU at 7am.

It really depends how his mood is on a shorter nap. Some LOs are cranky after a capped nap and recover quite quickly so are overall well rested and the routine settles. Some just don't recover after a capped nap so remain moody the entire day, not very nice for anyone.

Mine was best with a 2hr nap and 10 hr night until we dropped the nap. Now he does a full 7-7, 12 hr night.

Buttonbobs · « **Reply #2 on:** March 07, 2015, 09:19:23 am »

Is it the messing about at BT that makes you feel a routine change is needed or the NW? A NW on it's own probably wouldn't lead me towards changing a routine, but if you do I agree absolutely with Creations regarding your options. My DD also kept the longer nap and shortened her night, capping naps didn't work for her either, but it might for your LO.

What is happening at the NW? How is he waking, crying straight away or playing or something in between? How long does it take for him to settle back down? What are you doing to help him settle if he is crying out?

Florena49 · « **Reply #3 on:** March 07, 2015, 09:57:34 am »

Im tempted to do a nap at 12.30 and see if that shifts the wu in the morning.
The thing is he is apparently a golden child when he isnt with me, he can skip his nap and be absolutely happy at the childminders ( has done this before) he always wakes crying after his nap, whethe it was 1.10 or 2 hours.
At night, sometimes daddy beings him to bed, other times he says ib his cot, he is easy to settle, just needs putting back down and telling him to go back to sleep.

I will try shifting and see if that makes a difference to wu and then we can try and work out this NW.

Buttonbobs · « **Reply #4 on:** March 07, 2015, 10:02:40 am »

I would give it a go if you want to.

As for the NWs, if he is easy enough to get back to sleep I wouldn't worry too much about it, just put him back in his cot and reassure him with your voice as you are and he'll soon get the idea he doesn't need your presence to go back to sleep.

Truly Blessed · « **Reply #5 on:** March 08, 2015, 08:48:23 am »

Hi Hun,

Sorry you're still having some difficulty, it's hard over long periods of time

so ((HUGS)) for that.

Can you post what routine you were actually shooting for recently

and remind me exactly how old he is please.

Also as he is only quite recently in his own bed, IIWM I would make that a constant now, so the message is crystal clear and his NW aren't extended due to the possibility of co-sleeping.

x.

Florena49 · « **Reply #6 on:** March 08, 2015, 10:11:19 am »

He is 16 months now.

He has been an independent sleeper from about 4 months, no dummies, swaddled etc.
we moved i September and had major renovations in the house done, so we were all sauashed in one bedroom and co-slept for a couple of months. I was still BF at the time and as it turned out it wSnt co sleepibg but BF that was the problem at night. We weaned at 14 months, im pregnant and it wS unbearably painful to feed him. And within a week he started sleeping better, still slept with us for part of the night, but only woke twice to start with and then just once. We both work, so sone nights when we are both particularly tired then we will bribg him to bed with us, usually thats around 2am.

He has sttn twice, but not on this routine.

Since he was 14 months we aimed for
7wu
12-2 nap
7BT

In terms of nap and wu it worked perfectly he also settled at BT within minutes.
I reckon about 3 weeks ago he started waking earlier 6.30 or so and struggling at BT. Can take him upto 30 mins.

So we started doing set naps

7wu
12.15nap
7.15 BT

The problem is that he never wakes at 7, so wanted to shift that first really.

Yesterday we did

6.45wu
12.25nap-2.25
8BT

I think the 2 hour nap killed it for us, he was just not ready for BT. And we had 1 Nw around 2am, he slept till 6.50, but he was in a very light sleep, and in the night he was scratching abd movibg aroubd lots, just not tired enough and crying out, he does that when he cant fall into deep sleep.
So it seems that 2 hour sleep as lovely as it is is killing the dayfor us. i do prefer an earlier BT than 8pm

creations · « **Reply #7 on:** March 08, 2015, 11:21:24 am »

How about capping at 1.5hrs with the start of the nap moving later but the end of the nap staying at 2pm?
So 12.30 - 2pm, with 7/7.30pm BT?
This kind of routine can work for some to reduce the nap and maintain the night. The only way to really tell is to choose to do it and see what happens over time.
If it doesn't work out then switching to long nap shorter night would be the other option.

I was also pretty against an 8pm BT but you know if you see your LO doing well on a longer nap and shorter night you just kind of suck it up and remind yourself the late BT is not for ever. It felt like a big shift for us for a few days but we all adapted to the change pretty quickly, we were so in the habit of 8pm BT that when he dropped the nap and needed a 7pm BT it was a huge shock to our day! Having to get dinner ready earlier, no proper time to play after dinner etc etc. It was a tight squeeze...but again we quickly adapted and now it seems very normal.

Florena49 · « **Reply #8 on:** March 08, 2015, 22:50:12 pm »

I dont even know anymore, will give ut a few days.

He had 1.10 min nap, as he was with mil she didnt resettle, aimed for 7.15 bt but didnt sleep until 7.30

And has been up twice now, which is unheard of really.

I guess i will persevere with the 7wu and 12.30nao and BT might have to be played with. But around 7 i guess

Florena49 · « **Reply #9 on:** March 09, 2015, 06:37:45 am »

Up at 6 its killing me and no idea what to do with his nap

creations · « **Reply #10 on:** March 09, 2015, 09:09:58 am »

I would keep his nap time set.

Truly Blessed · « **Reply #11 on:** March 09, 2015, 10:15:32 am »

Hi Hun,

Gosh you've had a lot on your plate, you must be shattered, bless you.

Have you considered cutting his nap initally by 15 minutes, so a 1hr 45 minutes nap. Also I wonder if he may do better with a longer 1st A time

Meaning short PM could be over ridden by long AM, which works well for some LO's. So I guess you would be looking to achieve something like this in the long term:

WU 7.00

Nap 1 to 2.45

BT 7.30

I suspect it may be a good idea to lengthen his day by 30 minutes maybe, from his old routine. This may mean the slightly shorter nap will work, so if he does do better on a decent nap, it's a happy medium, and you keep BT earlier than 8.00, overall sleep being 13 hours 15 minutes $:-\$ .

It's all trial and error Hun, it may be that the nap is still too long, but then you decide (like said previously) if you can handle a longer day because you think it is better for DS, or if you cut the nap by 30 mins and see how he does.

((HUGS))

x.

Florena49 · « **Reply #12 on:** March 09, 2015, 21:42:18 pm »

Ill scrap today i think, its a first he fell asleep whilst having lunch in his chair at 11.10! Bless him, and it wasnt even dozed off, he was out, i took him upstairs put him to bed and he slept until 12.50. Woke up happy, but i still put him to bed at 7, i know he was OT and he wome 50 mi. later, but asleep now. He is at the childminders for the next two days, so we will take the days as they come, he doesnt sleep there well at all, some days he just doesnt sleep there...ah these babies

creations · « **Reply #13 on:** March 09, 2015, 23:34:36 pm »

Maybe he's coming down with something? I hope not.
Vibes for a better day tomorrow.

Truly Blessed · « **Reply #14 on:** March 10, 2015, 12:49:55 pm »

Hi Viktoria,

Just checking in to see how things are, it's so tricky. Hope he is well though, not sick I mean.

x.

Florena49 · « **Reply #15 on:** March 10, 2015, 13:29:00 pm »

I hope he is t coming down with anything, as i have a cold myself, he was up at 5.50 this morning, rubbinh his eyes and yawning but just couldnt go back to sleep. He is at the childminders today and tomorrow so i wont know what sleep he had until the end of the day

If he has t slept at all i might just get him to sleep at 6 and be done with it

Truly Blessed · « **Reply #16 on:** March 10, 2015, 13:39:11 pm »

It may be that he is coming down with a cold also then. I would just watch him and go with the flow from his cues Honey, sometimes it's all you can do in the short term. I agree a really early night would be a good idea if he hasn't napped today, I guess chances are if he is getting a cold he will have though :/.

Good lucks and ((HUGS))

x.

Florena49 · « **Reply #17 on:** March 11, 2015, 11:34:38 am »

He seems fine, no cold just me suffering. He had 25 min nap from 3-3.25 uesterday only settled at 7.15 and slept until 6.05. So he sttn again, but 6 is just so early for us and i dont want to just shoft the day and move his Bt because we just wouldnt have any time in the evening.
So as im at home tomorrow i will need to resurrect our routine.

Truly Blessed · « **Reply #18 on:** March 11, 2015, 13:10:57 pm »

It's often hard when LO doesn't get the 'WU time email!' ugh. Happens to us all, but finger's crossed that getting back into the routine does the trick.

Good Luck.x.

Florena49 · « **Reply #19 on:** March 11, 2015, 19:13:14 pm »

Oh he certainly didnt het the message, but very quoetly stayed in bed with us until 7! And he had no sleep today at all and he didnt fall asleep in the car and settled straight away at 7pm, how can a 16 month okd not sleep during the day and be ok? I mean the childminder says that he is the best behaved little boy, who has had a brilliant day today, playing nicely and doing baking for red nose day. Ahhhhh!

creations · « **Reply #20 on:** March 11, 2015, 19:17:33 pm »

Sounds like fun doing baking!
Hope he has a good night and not OT.

Truly Blessed · « **Reply #21 on:** March 12, 2015, 10:23:39 am »

Quote from: Florena49 on March 11, 2015, 19:13:14 pm

And he had no sleep today at all and he didnt fall asleep in the car and settled straight away at 7pm, how can a 16 month okd not sleep during the day and be ok?

I have absolutely NO idea, it never happened in this house!! lol

But I wouldn't knock it. I Doubt that would be the case for several days in a row though eh

Hope he had a good night x.

Florena49 · « **Reply #22 on:** March 12, 2015, 13:38:54 pm »

He woke at 4am and then slept till 7am. I rhink he is catching up today as he was out at 11.40, once again asleep in his highchair! Tjeres a pattern after 2 days of no sleep he just need to catch up. When he is at home we never have no sleep days, he only does that at the childminders.

creations · « **Reply #23 on:** March 12, 2015, 18:33:51 pm »

It doesn't seem to be effecting the nights so much though so perhaps he can cope with the changing routine of no nap at the CMs and an earlier nap at home to catch up.

Florena49 · « **Reply #24 on:** March 15, 2015, 06:57:17 am »

Its just not working here, we are having early wakings whatever we do it seems, this is the last 2 days seems silly really, he generally wakes once between 2-5, and on the nights he sttn he will also be up around 6.

6.10wu
12.15nap-2.15
7.32BT

6.40wu
12.22nap-2/2.30
8BT

6.00wu

Cut the daytime sleep?

creations · « **Reply #25 on:** March 15, 2015, 08:49:58 am »

Hi.
Your current routine doesn't look much different from when you started the thread so I think you do need to change something and stick there for several days to see how it pans out.
Either
1. cap nap. 1.5 hr. so 12.30-2.00 with 7.30 BT
or
2. move nap and BT later. Earlier I suggested 12.30 with a 8pm BT but I think now I'd be tempted to move later than that. 12.45 for a few days then prob shift again to 1pm.

Maybe read through the thread again to refresh your memory on the suggestions? Each of us has said a slightly different thing but the overall guidance is basically the same.

Florena49 · « **Reply #26 on:** March 15, 2015, 10:05:24 am »

H Creations

We have shifted BT to later and in letting him have the 2 hour nap as well, he was catchibg up after not sleeping for a coupke of days at the Cm and fallin asleep very early for nap, actually duribg lunch in his highchair, so there wasnt that much i could do. He seems more retes after the 2 hour nap during the day, but once he has caught up with sleep he goes back to wakibg early. So i dont think it works for us.
So my next step would be to cut his nap and bribg BT slightly earlier, not 8pm. Although he slept last night 8-4.30 and up this morn at 6 ((

Florena49 · « **Reply #27 on:** March 20, 2015, 12:42:24 pm »

Nothing good to report really

No sleep at the childminders so very early nap yesterday and slept for 3 hours nearly and still settled at 7.45 ok. Woke at 1.40 at night and then slept till 6.40.

Just settled for a nap now, spent a good 15 mins just playing around in his cot, babbling away, so im at loss really, he has been awake for 6 hours is this even normal. I understand why CM struggles to get him to bed if he is like this with her she doesn't have 20 mins to get him to sleep, she has other kids. On wednesday after CM he fell asleep i the car and i couldnt wake him up when dh and Os come home. I was getting a bit worried as it was only 4.30pm and he has t had dinner.
So i dont really know what to do with him today, clearly he has caught up on sleep now. Is this how long he needs at nearly 17 months

creations · « **Reply #28 on:** March 20, 2015, 15:38:28 pm »

Honestly I don't remember off hand what DS's routine or A time were at that age, I do remember him eventually being on a 2pm nap though - probably a bit older than your DS - I do remember his morning A always had to be increased or he wouldn't nap. Long morning A time and shorter afternoon A time.

What time are you and the CM trying for nap now?
I think I'd ask CM to try much later, as you say she doesn't have lots of time to spend settling him so if she tried much much later he may settle quickly enough to get some sort of nap in rather than skip it. I don't think you have anything to lose, pretty pointless worrying about OT from a late nap as he isn't napping at all with the CM, kwim?

Florena49 · « **Reply #29 on:** March 20, 2015, 20:20:25 pm »

I see your point, some sleep better then none at all, just feel like with the messy two days and 2 days to get back to some sort of routine it is becoming hard work and i actually loosing track of what his routine should look like.
We tell cm to aim for 12.30, he just doesnt, but then they are having way too much fun i guess.
I aim for the same time, but as i say thirsdays are out he usually falls asleep by 11 with no way of keeping him awake, fridays we are trying to reestablish the routine and the weekend is kind of time to have a routine but when u dont know what it should look like its difficult.

6.40wu
12.40nap-2.05/2.35
7.45BT

This was today, he wasnt settling at 12.30 for nap-woke up briefly coughing, i just went in and said its time to sleep he turned away and continued sleeping, settled for BT great within 5 mins.

So we shall see what time he wakes tomorrow morn and whether he will settle at 12.30 again.

creations · « **Reply #30 on:** March 21, 2015, 09:12:45 am »

How about just ask CM to put him down 1pm? I know it looks like a big leap in time but he isn't napping at all so really there is no harm yk?
I think some times a radical experiment is called for. As you say the routine is lost or off/on.

Florena49 · « **Reply #31 on:** March 21, 2015, 20:24:55 pm »

I think i will even if its just an hours sleep its better than no sleep for two days. I think we are heading that way anyway, today was

6.30
12.30nap-2.20 6A
8bt. 5.40A

Will see what time he wakes tomorrow. He settled like a dream for both nap and BT today ))

Florena49 · « **Reply #32 on:** March 21, 2015, 20:53:39 pm »

Up at 8.50, does he really need 6 hours A each side

creations · « **Reply #33 on:** March 22, 2015, 08:50:10 am »

So he slept almost 13hr night??

Florena49 · « **Reply #34 on:** March 22, 2015, 12:31:38 pm »

Oh no that was he woke at 20.50 after goi g to bed at 8pm, he was up at 5.50 this morning which nearly killed all of us. Down for a nap now though will wake him at 2

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Author Topic: Routine help pls (Read 3030 times)