3mo short napper: help and support so needed

[LaraDaisy]

Hi everyone!
so the situation here has changed. We went to the in-laws for Easter and during that time we dropped the swaddle and of course lost our routine.
So since we are back (8th of april) I've been trying to go back to our routine but so far it has not been that successful.
First, I will post my routine for today:
last night he had DF at 22-40 - he had 170ml of formula (started three nights ago, i am trying to give him formula for DF to see if he sleeps longer during the night, my own milk I pump and store)
woke up for night feeds at 02-45 & 05-15
06-45 wake up
07-10 tried to feed (he ate in 2-3 min periods and then started crying)
08-00 sleep (fell asleep quite easily)
08-45 woke up & ate & fell asleep back again from 09-00 till 10-10
10-50 eat
11-45 sleep (in the stroller)
12-15 woke up & did not resettle
12-50 eat
14-10 sleep (but it took me ab 30 min to get him to sleep - he just creams the moment I put him down, if i hold him in my arms he doses off almost immediately but if i put him in the crib - he screams as if on fire)
14-40 woke up & eat
16-20 sleep (I tried to put him in his crib before he was sleepy and play with him there and somehow i sucedded in using sh-pat (was shushing very loudly in his ear and patting him quite hard) and he fell asleep
17-05 & 17-25 woke up & eat & fell back asleep
18-00 woke up & activity time
19-00 eat & bath & bedtime ritual, in bedroom the screaming started again, and after more than 40 min of this screaming i just let him fall asleep in my arms and transfered him in his crib almost asleep (after 2 or 3 attempts)
20-00 sleep and is still sleeping
so between 22-00 and 23-00 I will do DF - 170ml of formula.

So, this screaming is something very new, it started yesterday. And it is killing me, I just cannot let him scream like that, it is almost as if the crib is hurting him. He used to be falling asleep more or less ok most of the times. Why the screaming? What do i do wrong? Is it time for PU/PD? He is 4 months on Friday, could that be the reason? He started the screaming thing yesterday and I am already at the end of my rope. I hate to let him scream or cry! I do not belive in letting babies cry it out!!! I have to find a way to manage putting him down to sleep without screaming.

Also, the naps got longer, it is now 30+mins, but I lost my ability to resettle him, the only way he resettles now is if i feed him and he falls asleep on the breast.

Also, the BF went totally crazy, I have the impression that my milk supply is diminishing, as every time I try to pump almost nothing comes out and pumping used to be very easy and was yielding a lot of milk but not in the last two weeks. I am drinking tons of fennel tea but it seems to help only to a certain extent. So, he is eating in small parts and the only way he eats longer is when he is sleepy.

[ecwinters]

Hi LaraDaisy,
I have a touchy 3 month old boy and your sleeping situation sounds so similar - we have short naps (45 mins is good, 30 mins is after too much screaming!) and he screams when I try to put him down in his cot.  A week ago, he was on the way to self-settling and I'm not sure what has gone wrong now.  It's like he suddenly associates sleep with something awful!  I thought the swaddle might be annoying him, changed it for a sleeping bag - we had one good sleep when he was back to self-settling again - but then he reverted to the screaming.  Like you, I have to pick him up and he then falls asleep on me - but then wakes up and screams when i put him down. 

Has your situation resolved itself and if so, how?

[weaver]

Hey there, would you like to start your own thread? I know you ended with a question for Lara but you'll get more responses to your question if you start your own thread and if you do start a post (or I can split this one off) please provide a rough timetable for the day, how long he's napping, how long he's awake, that sort of thing.  FWIW, my sensitive LO needed a really long wind-down (sh-pat in my arms and into the cot and keep patting!) and limited stimulation to get to sleep happily. I would really doubt your wee boy has a negative association with sleep or his swaddle or cot or whatever. I know it can feel like that but it's probably something else, like OT or UT or OS.

It could be worthwhile you reviewing this:
What does a good wind down consist of (Includes 4S ritual)

[ecwinters]

Hi thanks - but I think it's an A time issue.  Will keep playing around with it but I pushed the first A time out today and got a long nap with no crying!  Thanks.