She just seems to want/need me to have my hand on her back.
The idea with BW or the no-cry sleep solution, which are very similar, is to gradually wean this need so she has the confidence to fall to sleep without your hand there.
Many times we can get a bit carried away with our soothing/reassuring method (whatever that is) and because we are likely very tired ourselves it is so easy to go into a kind of 'hand on back and go into a daze' state. I suggest for beginning the sleep training gradual wean that you try to remain absolutely vigilant to her movements and breathing so that as she gets settled and drowsy, beginning to nod off you reduce the pressure of your hand. For the first stage she can still fall to sleep with your hand on her, but a slightly lighter touch, if she fusses you can add a little more pressure again to give the reassurance but then reduce again as soon as she begins to calm or nod. This may happen several times in one BT and that's fine the idea is in the end she falls to sleep with a lighter touch. Then move on a step, next BT begin again with the firm touch but more quickly reduce the pressure, again if she fusses increase, then decrease. It's a gradual process of reduction with constant reassurance. The ultimate aim of course (a few steps down the line) is for her to go into the cot, for you to do a brief hand on her and leave the room.
There is actually one bonus to beginning it now which is that her BTs are pretty rubbish anyway so she is already losing sleep. Often parents are afraid of a gradual wean because it is likely to cause a bit of lost sleep as LO doesn't fall to sleep quite as quickly when these reduction steps are in place - until they have adapted to it that is.
Buntybear has suggested shushing so she can hear the sound of your voice, if you find shushing bothers her (some don't like shushing at this age) try introducing a key phrase, something like "everything is ok, it's sleepy time" and repeat this. This is the equivalent to shushing as eventually you can use the verbal reassurance from outside the door if/when needed.
let us know how you get on.
