Author Topic: Finally dropping the NFs... a hand to hold and some accountability, please?  (Read 9708 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline katie80

  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 220
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 11169
  • Location: USA
Glad you are getting better wake-ups, Katherine! :)

I keep telling myself to try dream meds, but haven't yet had the courage to set my alarm to wake up another time in the night. Sun night I didn't fall asleep til 1:30/2am, as G called out every 15/30/45min from 9:30-12:30, when he vomited. Mon night Charlie was pretty unsettled. Tues night G was up with diarrhea at 2, I resettled Charie at 4 and then he was up for good at 5. Ugh, I'm tired and cranky and my kids have watched far too much tv. :(

I need some help going forward. We're still stuck in this OT mess, but I don't know how to get him out. I don't reliably get two naps that can help and his one nap days aren't long enough to make any headway. I'm feeling like we'll be stuck on a 5:30-6 routine forever. :P What is the best way forward?

Here are the last few days...
Mon 4/6
WU 5:52
Nap 11:15-12:25
BT 5:45/6

Tues 4/7
WU 5:30
Nap 11:50-1:35 (in car, I know he woke a couple times and fell back to sleep)
BT 7 (aimed for 6:30, which I'm sure was too late, but I wanted to try and push it a bit ::))

Wed 4/8
WU 5
Nap 1 9:25-9:45 (in car)
Nap 2 2:35-3:05 (tried for 12:45, but didn't settle; tried again at 1:45, and finally ended up holding him and bouncing him to sleep :-\)
BT guess I'll aim for 6

What a mess.... I tried to feed him back to sleep at 5 this morning, but he wouldn't go.



Offline kayra

  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 60
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 5773
  • 2 for 1!!
  • Location: Istanbul, Turkey
Oh katie, so many hugs, I wish I had the magic formula to sort Cs sleep!
Monday looks like he had a 12hr day which seems to have worked ok, I guess Tuesday bt was too late like you said which caused an ot ew, do you think the nap that day was too long even tho he woke a few times?
So maybe aim for 12hr days? Could you or dh dream-med when you're going to bed so that you don't have to wake up to do it, I can totally understand why you wouldn't want to do that!
Another thought is after a 2 nap day-tho I guess the sleep in total for today was very low-would be to push out the bt, I guess you could only do that if the 2nd nap wasn't super short though. Sorry not very helpful just trying to think what I'd do if it were me... So many hugs!

Our angel Victor 06.11.10  We miss you, but look forward to the day we will see you again my love 1Cor. 15
Angel, April 2011

Offline katie80

  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 220
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 11169
  • Location: USA
Thanks, Kayra... I appreciate your thoughts!

Monday looks like he had a 12hr day which seems to have worked ok, I guess Tuesday bt was too late like you said which caused an ot ew, do you think the nap that day was too long even tho he woke a few times?
I don't think so... he seems to be perpetually OT at the moment. I'm guessing he still needs at least 1.5hr day sleep, but I've definitely been wrong with him before! :P

So maybe aim for 12hr days?
I think this is probably the answer, but unfortunately it's a little unrealistic when he's consistently waking at 5-5:30. There are a couple days of the week when 6:30 is the earliest I can get him down. :-\

So, Wed night I did give meds at 3:15 (he'd been up since 2:15), but he still woke at 5:20 on Thurs, which makes me think the OT is stronger than the teething pain, but I'm sure one isn't helping the other. I can see one point of both top molars cutting through... it could be a long process. :(

Thursday routine was...
WU 5:20
Nap 11:30-12:50ish (in car, after G's gymnastics)
BT 6:30 (earliest possible on Thurs)

Gave meds at BT and have another set ready. Sigh, this is ugly.



Offline jessmum46

  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 411
  • Posts: 14235
  • Location: UK
Dropping back in with more hugs Katie, it's messy over here too, back to 5.30am WU today :(. I'm not sure I have any more pearls of wisdom, things would be going a lot better here if I did ::) I guess you can only offer opportunities for him to sleep, you can't make him.  Are you doing a set nap/BT now?

Offline clazzat

  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 286
  • Posts: 12883
  • Location: Kent, UK
Is he lsn?  Have you tried a consistent week or so on one nap to see if it lengthens?  Alternatively, could you AP a nap of about 15 minutes in the morning to get him through to a lunchtime nap and see if he can sleep a bit longer at lunch?  Mine had a very short am nap for ages, almost pointless but it made such a big difference.

Offline Truly Blessed

  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 125
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 7747
  • Location:
Hun, I'm no expert on your DS sleep history, but I do remember that when Sam went through the awful OT EW periods, I would go with a nap in the morning as soon as he looked tired. This used to be the only way to get a decent one, so I would try at the first sign. Of course it doesn't always work, but when it does it can give you that one springboard you need to start to improve things. If you can just get that one super nap then you may be able to get to a decent BT and hopefully shift WU. Don't know if this advise is any good for you situation, but want to add ((HUGS)) and empathy too.

Vicki.x.



Offline katie80

  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 220
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 11169
  • Location: USA
(((Hugs))), Katherine... boo to 5:30! >:(

Are you doing a set nap/BT now?
No, but thinking this is the way I need to go. Our lives cannot revolve around getting him to sleep. I've done that before with Claire, but it's not really possible with #3. What would you set it at... 11:30 and 6:30? Or, 12 and 7? I do really believe in EBTs, but even with OT, I feel like I don't have a lot of hope getting him back to sleep at 5:30am if he went to bed at 6-6:30pm. :-\ Most people I know IRL would laugh at me for putting him to bed at 6pm if he's waking up at 5-5:30 (although I know they're not always right).

Is he lsn?  Have you tried a consistent week or so on one nap to see if it lengthens?  Alternatively, could you AP a nap of about 15 minutes in the morning to get him through to a lunchtime nap and see if he can sleep a bit longer at lunch? 
He is on the lower end of the specturm... TBH, I'm not sure where as he's always had NWs. :-[ I've never consistently held to one nap because of the EWs. I can try the 15min AP (I'd really like that to work!), although it has to be in the car and I don't know for how long G will let me do that.

He woke at 3:45 last night, I gave him meds and he settled within 15-20min, but was still up at 5:20. Tried for a nap at 10 and he's just settling at 10:30. Will let him sleep as long as he can and go from there. My parents are home now after being away for a few weeks, so would happily take the big two so I can try a pm CN if possible today.

Thanks so much for sticking with me, ladies. I'm really grateful for your help and patience with me!! :-*

Posting with you, thanks Vicki! I've kind of tried that today... it's hard to know when to go for it as overall he's just so cranky. He was definitely ready at 10, but took awhile to settle. I don't know if it's because it's early or he's OT or he's just struggling with IS right now. :-\ Crossing my fingers for a good one.



Offline Truly Blessed

  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 125
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 7747
  • Location:
I don't know if it's because it's early or he's OT or he's just struggling with IS right now.

Sometimes it's all of the above Hun :( Did he have a good length nap? What time did he actually go over?

x.



Offline katie80

  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 220
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 11169
  • Location: USA
Fell asleep at 10:30, slept for 30min and I couldn't resettle. >:( ::) Only tried for 10min, because G came in and told me he was going to poop. :P Not sure what I'll do this afternoon...



Offline Truly Blessed

  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 125
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 7747
  • Location:
Ugh, 30 mins :( That's so rubbish! it's really difficult to make a good call when they're all over the place isn't it. IIWM I'd probably shoot for as early as 1.30 :/ if possible.

((HUGS))

x.



Offline Truly Blessed

  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 125
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 7747
  • Location:
Ugh, 30 mins :( That's not great it is, but hopefully it will help his mood until nap 2,  it's really difficult to make a good call when they're all over the place isn't it. IIWM I'd probably shoot for as early as 1.30 :/ if possible.

((HUGS))

x.



Offline jessmum46

  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 411
  • Posts: 14235
  • Location: UK
Hugs Katie, and thanks for popping over to my thread too :-* we should get these boys together some day!

If you are going to set times I would set bedtime at a time you can realistically do on a regular basis, with the option of 30 mins earlier if possible if things go wrong.  So I guess that would be 7pm, with 6.30pm being your set early bedtime?  So probably a 12/12.30pm nap.  Do you ever get a shot at a later WU every so often in the morning?  Just thinking you may need to use a day like that to springboard to the planned set times.  Or go with the option of a quick AP nap around 9am, just 15 mins or so and then shoot for the planned time.  You'd have to stick like glue for a good week though and really try to avoid those unplanned naps in the car, I know it's hard to do when you have to get out and about with the others but makes the set naps hard to 'set' if you see what I mean.

How was the afternoon?


Offline Martini~

  • Birth Clubs
  • Forum Moderator
  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 48
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 3009
  • Location:
Still here to support you Katie.

I have to say aloud what I think... so with 6/6:30 BT, 5:30 WU doesn't seem to be an EWU Honey... 11-11.5h of sleep seems to be fine?
I would just push for a later nap, whatever you do right now. So if you ave 11:30,  just push to 12 and push BT to 6:30/7:00. When you will start having a nap at 12, go for 12:30 if WU will still be before your ideal time. And with nap at 12:30, go for BT at 7:00/7:30. WDYT?

Btw we are also in a kind of a mess. I think 2h nap seems to be too much for DS now. And I am still being miserable that's happeneing! I need this ME time:)
~Marta

Offline katie80

  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 220
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 11169
  • Location: USA
Afternoon was a mess. ::) Tried for nap at 2 and it looked like he was settling on his own (he didn't even cry for me when I left the room, which has happened every nap time for the past week). But, he couldn't get himself to sleep... I started WIWO at 2:20, but abandoned at 2:30 and went to get Claire from school (my mom was here so he could sleep, but I wasn't going to have her do WIWO). Tried again after the school run and he just screamed, so took him in the car and he slept from 3:45-4:15. Totally struggled to fall asleep at BT, so I finally picked him up and nursed him (again) at 8pm. I don't know that I can do two naps anymore. :-\

I have to say aloud what I think... so with 6/6:30 BT, 5:30 WU doesn't seem to be an EWU Honey... 11-11.5h of sleep seems to be fine?
Yes, I agree. That's why I don't want to get stuck there. I'm calling it an EW, although most days it probably isn't (we've just migrated to an earlier day ::)).

Do you ever get a shot at a later WU every so often in the morning?
Not in the last two weeks. :-\ I could try to feed him at a 4/4:30 waking, and see if that helps. Or, feed and then put him in the swing (I've done that before when I've been desperate, although he's much older now).

So, maybe I'll try the 15min morning car nap for the next several days and do a 12/12:30pm main nap? Or, should I just start at 11am and gradually move the nap later every week or so until I get to somewhere decent? I think most of Claire's late afternoon activities are done at the end of April/beginning of May, so that should help with EBT a bit.



Offline michaeljacknnugg

  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 214
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 13362
  • New life
  • Location: UK
DS is an early bird, and was down on one nap at around C's age. He's lsn too is C, do you think?

We could never react to ews without it causing another one, or a series of them. Keeping nap time the same helped, I think ours was after lunch by this point. It gradually pushed back until he wasn't napping until 2p.m. - even after getting up at 5a.m.

Not saying they are the same, but do you see any similarities between them?
My 'little man' - kind-hearted Spirited whirlwind, 2008
My love, my everything - BabyTwo, Nov 2015