Almost 3 year old frequent NW

[Moogleit]

I need some help here, I have no idea what to do anymore. My daughter will be 3 next month and has been waking up 2-6 times a night for months and months now! She hasn't been napping since about December and the nap drop was cold turkey. There was OT stuff happening so we've been very diligent about early/consistent bedtimes but over the last couple of months have gradually gotten her to a 715 bedtime. She falls asleep easily but wakes up so much! Sometimes she just gets out of bed and comes down the stairs, sometimes she's sobbing and seems to be dreaming, sometimes she wants water and sometimes she has to go pee. It's so frustrating and I'm tired. The last couple of nights she's woken at 5 - I took her back to bed and told her it was too early and yesterday that worked and she slept until 630 but this morning she woke at 515, 530 & finally 545. She most often wakes up for the day between 615-630 so this new pre 6am thing is a bit concerning.

Any tips, advice to help her stay asleep?! I keep checking it up to developmental stuff but I really have no idea....

[Truly Blessed]

Hi Sweetie,

Oh my goodness, that sounds so rough for you all . Let's see if we can figure out what's going on eh? Can you tell me how long her day is generally? Why and how did she drop the nap, did she just start to refuse it for eg?

What is her personality? Is she spirited/touchy etc.

Is she in a bed now?

Have you looked into it being anything in her room which may be stopping her sleeping? for eg: too hot/cold, too much light etc.

Was she in a good routine before this started and has she always been and independent sleeper?

Sorry for so many questions, it's always the way. Just let me know as much information as you can think of please.

Here for you Honey, many ((HUGS)) and much sympathy.

Vicki.x.

[Moogleit]

It's pretty draining for sure! Especially since her 91/2 month old brother is sleeping all night (knock on wood) so I just keep daydreaming about the long stretches of sleep I'm missing out on haha.

She normally wakes up around 6:15-6:30 and we are very diligent with her bedtime & routine, she is in bed with the lights out by 7:15. That has gradually been moved up over the last 5-6 months from 6 or 630 when she was really OT right after dropping her nap. The nap dropping started sort of suddenly in November with her taking forever to fall asleep & coming out of her room a couple of times before finally settling. That continued for a few weeks with her taking longer and longer and coming out more and more often until she just would not stay in her room no matter what. I might have fought her for a little longer but we had a preemie newborn with colic so I didn't have a ton of fight in me to be honest.

She is mostly textbook but her sleep needs of late seem to lean towards being touchy. Last night was one of the best nights in awhile she was in bed at 715, got up twice right away and then didn't wake again until after 1am and then she slept until 7am.

I can't imagine what it could be in her room that could be hindering her sleep, we have black out curtains so light isn't an issue and the temperature is very moderate. My hubby and I have been going back and forth as to wether or not what is waking her up is night terrors. Sometimes she wakes up sobbing, babbling and is close to inconsolable. Nothing we say or do seems to help other than just being there until she calms down. Sometimes she wakes up because she has to go to the bathroom/wants water/can't find her lovey and other times she just starts crying and calling out for me for no apparent reason.

She was in a great routine before all this started, she would sleep 8-8 like clockwork. Super independent sleeper! Her sleep routine was always the most important thing pretty much from 6months on. I don't know if this is a factor or not but I feel like she has had a huge amount of change in her life in the last year - transition to a toddler bed, potty training, daycare & preschool, new sibling who came 2 months early after I got sick with HELLP. It may have nothing to do with it and she's always been super good and easy with transitions but I thought I would mention it.

I appreciate you digging deep into this, I would love to help her get a good night sleep again. And me too of course!

Thank you so much for the support!

[Truly Blessed]

Oh my goodness a baby in the mix too, you have your work cut out Sweetie.

First off congratulations on what you have done so far, you clearly know your stuff and what is going on now is something you couldn't have avoided in my opinion, it's just one of those 'tricky periods' that happens for all LO's.

I have no experience of 'night terrors' but I do know many BW that do, and it sounds like they could be in the mix from what you describe. Here's a link for you to read through:

Nightmares and night terrors.

I also am a Mother of an only child, so not the best person to advise on the effect of other LO's arriving on the scene, but I do know from my moderating here at BW that it can also effect siblings, so you are right not to discount that Hun. If you don't already do so maybe go overboard verbally during the day about her being your 'special girl' to confirm her special place in the family. I think often when a LO knows they are loved, it seems unnecessary but it can't do any harm to give that little bit more you know?

I have had some success with audio stories for DS when he has had these types of problems. Even if she is not having trouble going to sleep, it may be that she is feeling anxious about things that they are transferring to sleep, and that is why audio stories can help a child feel in a better place when they go over, meaning the mind can be more rested and on a better track, IME anyway (in my experience).

WRT her waking early in the morning, in the first instance I would work on her staying in her room quietly until it is an acceptable time to wake up the rest of the family, which is something that gets worked on and discussed a lot here. So a gro-clock can help:

http://www.amazon.co.uk/The-Gro-Company-HJ008-Gro-Clock/dp/B002APJCNE/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1431938880&sr=8-1&keywords=gro-clock

Or some parents use a light on a timer. If you are okay with her being awake initially and just teaching her to stay put you could allow her to look at some books until 'wake up' time. The idea is once she has it in her little head that no matter what she is staying in her room, she may start to resettle. It's not ideal for her to be awake and looking at books, but while she is still in bed the extra rest really does help, and of course you have the rest of the family to consider, so sometimes it's just the way it is and the best solution.

When the NW happen, I would try and keep the interaction to a minimum. Of course if she has had a bad dream/night terror you need to stay with her, but otherwise just use a whispered voice and tell her 'Sleepy time Darling' without entering into any conversation.

Let me know your thoughts Hun, and any other questions you may have.

Vicki.x.