Author Topic: 3 year old driving us mad with poor bedtime and NWs galore!  (Read 759 times)

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Offline 2012mama

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My 3 year old girl has always been a spirited child.  When she was a baby, the Baby Whisperer books, this forum, and I had a great routine.... until she was out of her crib.  Ever since she's been in a toddler bed, it has been terrible.  She does not go to sleep anymore on her own, and begs us to stay with her until she falls asleep.  Part of this has been reinforced by us and she goes bonkers with full blown temper tantrums and does not go to sleep.  Most evenings she will sleep most of the night.  Last night, she came into our room 5-7 times and was returned to her room and fell asleep each time, only to come back into our room and wake us up yet again.  I am at my wits' end with this child.  When she does fall asleep in our bed, she tries to run a marathon on my back, hit and punch me in the face, all while blissfully dreaming. 

I have tried everything including Gro Clock, sticker charts, returning her to bed every time she gets out, having a discussion with her plenty of time before bed, and so much more.  I cannot take the sleep deprivation any more and I'm tired of one of us sleeping in another room just to be able to get through a day at work!

Help!

Offline Buntybear

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Re: 3 year old driving us mad with poor bedtime and NWs galore!
« Reply #1 on: June 22, 2015, 19:36:24 pm »
Hi, could you post her routine? Does she still nap? Is there anything else going on in her life at the moment that could be unsettling her?

Offline 2012mama

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Re: 3 year old driving us mad with poor bedtime and NWs galore!
« Reply #2 on: June 22, 2015, 19:51:23 pm »
Monday - Friday
WU 630-7
Breakfast, Get Dressed, Brush Teeth 7-800
Daycare 9am-5pm
Usually has a nap at daycare for 1-1.5 hours after lunch
5:30 dinner
6-7 quiet play with no tv
7 bedtime routine including books, pjs, brush teeth, toileting
730 lights out

Saturday - Sunday
WU 630-7
Breakfast, Get Dressed, Brush Teeth 7-800
Play outside, go to park, do errands
Snack 10am
12 Lunch
Usually no nap on weekends because she will NOT go to sleep at naptime with us
3 snack
more physical activity
5:30 dinner
6-7 quiet play
7 bedtime routine including books, pjs, brush teeth, toileting
730 lights out - she usually falls asleep quickly without a nap

My husband and I both work shift work so it's not always the same person with her on the weekends.

Offline Johnnyha65

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Re: 3 year old driving us mad with poor bedtime and NWs galore!
« Reply #3 on: June 22, 2015, 20:45:27 pm »
I'm afraid I don't have any advice just wanted to say we're in the midst of this behaviour too! So you have my sympathies. DS will be 3 in a week and we've had about 2 months of this awful nighttime behaviour, which started with him diving out of his cot, so we moved him to a bed, prior to this he was and IS and went down to bed no problem. We don't so much have BT woes, but NWs are at least 1 per night and can be back and forth for hrs some nights. I'm now 24 weeks pregnant, shattered and it's really taking its toll on my husband too.
I'm hoping it developmental as he has become very hard work during the day, but I will be watching your post!



Offline kebauter

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Re: 3 year old driving us mad with poor bedtime and NWs galore!
« Reply #4 on: June 22, 2015, 21:05:14 pm »
Hi!
We've been there too, age 3... So badly that I was all tensed up lying in bed because I knew he would be there soon. Maybe it's the age? I still "park" in front of his door (outside) until he sleeps (4,5 now) where he just can not see me but knows I'm there. It took us a while, but now he sleeps in 5 minutes.
After I introduced the "Big Sleepwel Hug" he hardly came out of bed at night.
Our conversation before going to sleep (the very last thing we do - he is lying down already)
Me: are you ready for the Big Sleepwel Hug?
Him: yes!
Me: are you sure?
Him: yes!
Me: do you know what the BSH does?
Him: it makes sure that I sleep very well until tomorrow morning!

And then we hug and I even rock him a bit. I feel it is important he explains or repeats what the BSH does. Now we don't even include it in the BTritual anymore. And if he has a few bad nights in a row, he asks for the hug again and sleeps well!
Sound very silly but I can guaranty you it gave us our nights back!! (Until his brother was born...;)

Show her that you trust that one day she'll sleep well again! Maybe she's scared because you are stressed about it and she doesn't know how to show you?

Hope it can help you a little bit! Good luck!

Offline Buntybear

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Re: 3 year old driving us mad with poor bedtime and NWs galore!
« Reply #5 on: June 22, 2015, 21:14:36 pm »
Hi - have you tried capping her nap at nursery? It could be that she is UT and so fighting BT. Olly had all but dropped his nap by 3 YO, I know a lot of LOs are.