Author Topic: 3 month old won't stay up long enough -- short naps = overtired days  (Read 1180 times)

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Offline KateNErinsMummy

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Dear god I need help!  My 13 week old is my second LO and I am at my wits end. I've been crying for the past two days and feel resentment starting to kick in.  I did EASY with my 23month old, and although we had a big of a bumpy start (started her at 5 months), it eventually worked like a dream.

Not this kid. I've been following EASY for over 2 months now and naps just aren't working.

My almost 3 month old is in the 95th percentile/big girl and weight gain/milk supply is not an issue. She has had some long naps 1:30-2:00 long, but that was through growth spurts.

I can't keep this kid awake. I I follow her sleep cues, I would have to start her WD after 45 minutes. She is almost 3 months and we are nowhere near the average A times. On average, her awake time is 55 minutes. She then wakes anywhere from 40-55 minutes. I have tried extending AW times, and then I get 35 minute overtired naps. I'm at a loss and am stressing out because in about a month we are supposed to be transitioning to a 4 hour EASY and I have no idea how that is going to happen when she can't stay awake long enough or sleep long enough.

Some questions:
If I try to extend her AW time again, how do I do this?  Push by 15 minutes?  That's what I was doing and it didn't work. Or should I move it straight to 1.5 hours and help her through the OT?  She's getting OT no matter what I do.

I have also tried WAke to sleep, but that doesn't seem to work either. If she's waking up at 40 minutes, when do I start?  30 minutes seems too late, but at 20 minutes, she's just barely fallen asleep!

Things to note -- she is EBF, sleeps well(ish) at night and falls asleep awake for the first nap and at bedtime. All other naps I have to shh/pat.

Typical day:
E: 7(give or take 30 minutes either way)
A:7:20-7:50 (as soon as I start to WD she gets fussy and goes to sleep shortly thereafter)
S: 8:00
A:8:40-9:30
S:9:30-10 (showing sleep cues so she sometimes goes back down for a short nap in her crib, otherwise it's the baby carrier or stroller)

E:10:15
A:10:35
S:11:00 (now she's OT)
A:11:40 (low key or try stroller/carrier)

E:1:00
A:1:20 - nothing fancy
S:2:00 ( AW time getting shorter and shorter as the day goes on...much harder to settle)
A:2:35 (OT...attemp nap extension...fails 95% of the time)
S:3:15 (almost always in carrier. At this point, my back is broke as she won't let me sit down)

E:4:00
A: 4:20
S:4:50 (screaming OT). Refuses catnap in her crib...just screams the entire time. Back to the carrier
A:5:30
E: 6:00

Please help. I need advice. I will try anything. Although my parents are helping with my 23 month old, I feel she is getting no attention from her me because I'm constantly dealing with naps. It's not fair to her.
A:6:20 bath time/bedtime routine
S: always asleep by or before 7PM (rarely have a problem at bedtime unless extremely OT)
Dream feed at 10:30...but she still wakes up at 2:30, so I don't think its working for her. I give her a paci to see if she's really hungry. She will usually go back to sleep for another hour, then wake up hungry.
Awake again between 6:30/7:00am

Offline Kellyjs

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Re: 3 month old won't stay up long enough -- short naps = overtired days
« Reply #1 on: June 28, 2015, 19:04:30 pm »
Hey hun, I'm so sorry you've not had a reply yet  :). Welcome to BW.

I've had those days too, where you just have to have a good cry as nothing you do seems to be working. It must be difficult with a nearly 2yr old too, sending you lots of ((hugs)). We can be here for you x

You called it hun, her awake times are far too short. You've been doing everything Tracy said about watching for cues etc but sometimes I think we have to have one eye on the clock too.

When you extended her A time before how far did you go if I may ask? Think that'll help us make a plan as to what to do. Did you only try it the once and then the nap was shorter or has it happened before too?

I've been where you are hun, I kept my DD on far too low of an A time up until she was around 6mo I think, until the lovely ladies on here convinced me to bite the bullet and not be so scared of OT. You know what, it wasn't as bad as the UT naps!!!! At least with OT naps there's a chance of resettling, but still to this day I don't think she's ever had an OT nap. The only thing I'm ever wary is of too long of an A time before BT as I hate OT emw!

Ok, ignoring the NW's as actually I think you're doing great there. 2 NF's are still very common at this age.

Let's work ont he first nap of the day as that's a great place to start. How about we look at increasing the A time by 10mins. Do you think that'll be doable?

Some links for you to have a read through:
Average A times- BOOKMARK ME!

And also I'll be back in a min to post the link to the quiz. It'll be interesting to see what type she is too, wrt making a plan x

The BW "Know Your Baby Quiz"

Introducing EASY to a 2nd child
« Last Edit: June 28, 2015, 19:07:22 pm by Kellyjs »



Offline KateNErinsMummy

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Re: 3 month old won't stay up long enough -- short naps = overtired days
« Reply #2 on: June 29, 2015, 14:24:10 pm »
Thanks for your advice. When I had tried keeping her up pre koi sly it didn't seem to work very well so I reverted to just watching her cues.

So this morning I took your advice and extended her A time by 15 minutes. She wasn't freaking out but was definitely fussy so I didn't want to push it any further. She woke up 35 minutes later -- which would usually mean an OT nap (am I right?), BUT she was happy and talking to herself. I could not settle her back. She was laughing at me. Put her in the stroller and she would not go to sleep and then started to really fuss the closer we got to eating time. I nursed her, changed her diaper and then did a very short WD routine and now she's sleeping.

So so far, today looks like this:
E:6:35
A:6:55
S:7:50
A:8:25
E:9:30
S:9:55

Now in all fairness, I think she started her 3 month growth spurt last night and she's all over the place. Considering she woke up happy after the first nap even though it was only 35 minutes, I will still push ahead again tomorrow.
Thanks for your help. I will post again in a few days unless you have other advice based on this morning.

Thanks again!!!!

Offline Kellyjs

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Re: 3 month old won't stay up long enough -- short naps = overtired days
« Reply #3 on: June 29, 2015, 19:01:21 pm »
Nah, I'd say that's an UT nap too hun. If they're happy and smiling I'd always go with UT especially if they give you that look to say you're having a laugh if I'm having any more sleep  ;). I'd still hold the extra 15mins for a day or so, then maybe look at increasing a little bit again.. Perhaps by 10mins and do w2s at around 25mins in. Wdyt?

Good luck and keep me posted  :-*