regression: 7 month old refuses to sleep

[Noelie]

Hi, this is my 1st post to the forum.

My lg is 7 months old - she’s very active and curious, she’s adorable except at NT and BT, she’s always been a bad sleeper. She was refusing all naps from day 1 and was chronically OT until I found the BW forum when she was 3 months old, after a lot of ssshhing and patting, (and 30 and 45 min naps) she settled into a flexible EASY routine. All timings vary depending on her WU time.

By 5 months old she was able to self soothe, i’ll put her to bed, she would complain a bit/babble and fall asleep pretty quickly, it was bliss.

Unfortunately a month later it all went pear shaped. No teething yet, but the 6 months growth spurt, crawling, trying to stand, solid food (BLW)… I’ve read that during the 6 month sleep regression, anything that gets her to sleep should be used so it’s been back to shh/pat, white noise,  and when desperate (quite often): breastfeeding (read comforting) to sleep on occasion, her naps are usually 1.5h, she has extended her A time from 2 to 2.5 / 3 hours. I follow her cues, or try anyway, but sleep is always a battle. It’s now taking up to 1 hour to get her to sleep, as soon as I put her in her cot, she crawls around, sits, tries to grab the mobile overhead, she screamed when she realises it’s Nap / Bed time and not play time, it escalates very quickly and she becomes unconsolable. So that’s a lot of screaming in one day, it breaks my heart.  Sometimes we have tried to skip the 3rd nap altogether because we’re getting too close to BT, of course she gets OT but if BT is delayed until too late, then it’s EWU (5/5.30am). She gets distracted when breastfeeding, she also refuses her BT routine, she used to love her massage now she won’t stay still for 2 seconds. At least one hour before BT I take all the toys away, I cuddle her, play the same gentle songs, but it’s not working, she’s excited and will not wind down even though she’s tired (yawing).

On a good day (last Friday) it looks something like that (although a 19.00 BT usually suits her better as it means a better night):

WU 6.40 (+/- 1 hour)
E 7.00 breastfeed
A
E 7.45 solid breakfast
A
S 9.30 - 10.45 (1 1/4 hours)
E 11.20 breastfeed (6min)
A
E 12.00 solid lunch
A
S 13.00 - 14.30 (1 1/2 hours)
E 15.30 breastfeed (15min )
A
S 16.40 - 17.40 (1 hour)
A
E 17.40 breastfeed (10 min) + solid dinner
A
BT 20.30

Sorry for the long post, I’m already thankful for all the information I got reading the forum, but now I’m at a loss and hoping to get some further advice. Thank you so much

[becj86]

Sounds like you're right in the thick of the 3-2 nap transition to drop that catnap and she really needs more A time. When its taking that long to get a LO to sleep and their A time is short compared with 'average', its general a good bet that they're undertired and therefore fight sleep when you first try to put them down for a nap, then become overtired whilst inconsolable.

Frankly, I think you're best off pushing those A times up to 3hr (and further if required but 3hr minimum for a few days to let the dust settle) and thinking about dropping that catnap. Routine would look something like this (obviously shift it for different WU/nap lengths if you wish, pop solids/milk top-ups in where desired/necessary):
7 - wake, eat
10 - nap
11:30 - wake, eat
2:30 - nap
4 - wake, eat
7 - BT

[Noelie]

Thank you for replying so quickly

It does sound obvious when you say it, doesn't it? I had tried it a little while back, 2 naps worked for a couple of days and then she was back to needing 3 naps a day, I got confused, she does have lots of 3h A time but her nights have rarely been 12h, anything between 9h and 11h. I did read the 3-2 naps transition but failed to recognise the signs, how? I guess there's an OT mum in the house Right then, I'll give it another go, and will remember to bring bed time forward if need be. Finger crossed her nights or naps will lengthened.

Your advice and time is much appreciated.

[becj86]

Its often hard to see the wood for the trees when you're stuck in that sleep deprivation and nothing seems to work.

Keep us posted

[Noelie]

Reporting on 2 naps a day, no more nap/bt screaming which is a relief, but still confused about the right A time. It went like this:

day 1:
WU 7.45 (unusual)
E
A = 2h
S 9.50 - 10.35 (she fell asleep on the breast, way too early for her nap - only 45min nap)
E
A = 3h1/2
S 14.00 —15.45 : 30 min nap extended on the breast by 45 min 
E
A = 3h1/4
BT 19.00 - woke up after 30 min - it took 2 hours to get her to sleep again on the breast, she woke up a further 4 times during the night (12.00 1.45 2.45 4.45) but she turned out to have a cold

day 2:
WU 6.35
E
A = 3h1/2
S 10.00 - 10.45 (45 min)
E
A = 3h1/2
S 14.00 - 15.30 : 30 min nap extended on the breast by 45 min 
E
A = 5 HOURS
BT: 20.30 (routine started at 18.30 for 7.00 BT, all quiet and good but energy kicked in when put to bed, crawling, sitting, standing, no screaming and no sleeping even though very tired)
Night BF  12.00 & 3.30
WU 6.30

When I started EASY @ 3-4 months her A time was longer than average. Do you think she need a longer A time in the morning? aiming for a proper 1.5h nap, which would fix the afternoon 30 min wu 

TIA

[becj86]

Yep, its quite possible she needs more than 3hr, especially if she was already needing longer than average at 3-4 months.

I presume she's been able to take a 1.5hr nap at some point? She's not an habitual 45min nap waker? If so, you might need to increase A time a bit more slowly to make sure you're giving her a chance to extend the naps.

[Noelie]

Here's the confirmation that you were spot on the 3-2 nap transition of course.

Things are much better now, it's not perfect, she hasn't been able to settle down by herself as she used too, maybe because she had a cold for the past week (so I resorted to magic boob) and adjusting to a new routine, but working on tweaking it and definitely improving. She is on 3.5h A time (more or less 15 min). Today has been a brilliant day so far, she went to sleep quickly with only a little help (both naps). Yes she has a tendency for 45 min wake (sometimes it's because she needs a wee!), however half her naps are back to 1.5h.

My mistake was to think a yawn or eyes rubbing were a clear sign of tiredness, but that's just a dip she has after solid food, at 1.5h A time and 3h A time and yet still have energy to go for longer.

Thankyouthankyouthankyou

[becj86]

Wonderful So glad she's getting back on track. I found it helpful to watch the clock til ~10 min before I expected DS would be ready for a nap, then watch him for cues.