30 MINUTE NAP HELP!!!!

[eogan0622]

 Hi All,

I'm really struggling with the 30 minute wake up into every.single.nap.  My LO is 3.5 months old and this has been happening for about 2 weeks and I really feel like I don't know what to do.  We have been following EASY since week 4 and it has been going well.  But her naps are so exhausting (for both of us).  She goes down, wakes up 30 minutes later ON THE DOT, and then the next 45-60 minutes are spent trying to get her back to sleep, which works about 50% of the time.  I have increased her A time to 1:45 this week, sometimes 2:00.  So, the scenario is: wakes up at 30 mins, give back paci or rock for 5-7 minutes, put back down, wake up 5-10 mins later, repeat x 3.  Eventually, after about 3 attempts, I just let her get up because I don't know what else to do!  Other times, she falls into a deep sleep the last attempt and sometimes sleeps another 1-2 hours!  I feel like EVERY time, she is still tired, since as soon as I pick her up she falls asleep in my arms. 

So I guess my first question is- when she wakes up every time after 30 minutes, do I just suck it up and attempt to get her back to sleep for 45-60 minutes or as long as it takes?  Or should I just get her up after that first initial 30 minute wake up?

And my second question is- IF she gets up after that 30 minute wake up and is up for good- do I wait to feed her?  For instance, if it looks like this:

7:00: Eat, up for the day
7:00-8:45: Awake, playing, happy
8:45-9:15: Sleep

*If she gets up for good at this point, should I feed her at 9:15 and start from there with 1:45-2:00 awake time, etc?  Or wait to feed her until 10:00?

I feel like I'm seriously losing my mind and like I spend ALL DAY trying to get the poor girl to rest!!!

Any help and advice is greatly appreciated.

Thank you SO much.

xo

[newkidontheblock]

Hugs, hun. This is simply a very trying age sleep-wise. Even with the perfect routine, a lot of the issues are developmental and pass as they get older.
short naps at 3-4 months? Take it easy, it will get better!

So I guess my first question is- when she wakes up every time after 30 minutes, do I just suck it up and attempt to get her back to sleep for 45-60 minutes or as long as it takes?  Or should I just get her up after that first initial 30 minute wake up?

That is why I did. I kept trying for the rest of the nap time. If it worked, great. If not, I would get her up, nurse and then PD again immediately. HOWEVER, in retrospect, I think I (and her) would have been happier if I tried for a while and then moved on instead of sitting in a dark room, shush-patting for all I was worth and feeling miserable as a result. So my advice would be to try for 10-15 minutes but if it isn't happening -- get on with your day. Simply bring the next nap a bit closer.

And my second question is- IF she gets up after that 30 minute wake up and is up for good- do I wait to feed her?  For instance, if it looks like this:

7:00: Eat, up for the day
7:00-8:45: Awake, playing, happy
8:45-9:15: Sleep

*If she gets up for good at this point, should I feed her at 9:15 and start from there with 1:45-2:00 awake time, etc?  Or wait to feed her until 10:

So I never really followed the traditional EASY WRT to feeding. I would get LO up and nurse immediately, so that I wasn't nursing too close to the next nap as I didn't want her falling asleep while feeding. I've always fed on WU in the morning and from naps, even if the nap is shorter than I would have liked.

Could you post your routine, hun? Let's have a look and see what we can work on

xx

[eogan0622]

Thank you so much for your response.  I read the linked post you sent and it REALLY helped my peace of mind.  Here is our EASY from yesterday:

7:00: up for the day
E: 7:10
A: 7:10-8:55
S: 8:55-9:25
A: 9:25-10:25
E: 10:25
S: 10:45-11:15/12:45 (30 min WU- Able to get back down over the course of 30 mins and slept until 12:45)
E: 1:00
A: 1:00-2:20
S: 2:20-2:50 (fell asleep in carseat during errands...)
E: 3:30
A: 2:50-4:20
S: 4:20-5:00
E: 5:00
A: 5-6:15 (Bath/bedtime routine)
E: 6:20
S: 630PM-6:00AM  (NW 10:00, 10:30, 2:00, 5:15)

[newkidontheblock]

Sorry that it took me so long to get back to you. Honestly, your day looks normal. I was wondering whether the A times might not be too long for her? Got instance, with my LO, she could only handle 1 hour for her first A for the longest time.. Almost till 4 months+. But that was a nap that was always the easiest to get and the longest. Do you think pulling back a bit might help?

I was also wondering about the NWs you've mentioned at 10 and again at 10.30. What happened there? The others seem perfectly normal

[eogan0622]

Thanks for the response!  In fact, I feel like her naps have actually improved the past couple days and now it's her night wakings that are getting so frequent!  She's been suddenly switching over to doing some longer naps during the day (1-2hrs) but her nightwakings are increasing A TON.  Our bedtime routine has been consistent since about 4 weeks- bath time, lotion/massage, lullaby, rocking, bed.  However as of a few weeks ago she would not go down without a pacifier- previously she only took pacifier for naps, which I didn't mind at all.  Now, I don't mind her having the pacifier to sleep, but it seems like she can't settle now without it! Her night wakings are constant- she's eating almost every 3-4 hours throughout the night, then goes back down, loses pacifier 10 minutes later, is up and needs resettling, sometimes 2-3 times!!!  Then she's up for good by 6am...

I know this probably doesn't go under "naps" anymore, but since you asked I thought I would share.  I have no idea what to do!  If I don't give her pacifier, she searchers around the bassinet for it and cries!


Any advice/help is appreciated!

[newkidontheblock]

Uh oh! Sounds like the paci might be hurting more then it's helping. No experience with this, sorry. You could post on the props board.

So what's your day looking like now? Do you think the increased NWs could be due to a growth spurt? Shouldn't last too long if so

[eogan0622]

Re: Pacifier- I know!!  I took it away for last night and things were better so hopefully that helps.  Here is what our EASY has been like for the past few days (give or take):

6:15: up
E: 6:15
A: 6:15-8:00
S: 8:00-9:45

E: 10
A: 10-11:45
S: 11:45-12:00 (CN IN STROLLER)

E: 12:30
S: 1-3:30

E: 3:30
A: 3:30-4:40
S: 4:40-5:00 (CN)

6:15: BEDTIME ROUTINE
E: 6:30
S: 7PM-7AM  NW: 12:30 (E), 3:20 (E), 5:15 (RESETTLE)

*nightwakings are still so frequent! Every 3 hours?! I thought she would be past this by now...

[-Maya-]

Hello Eogan, just my two cents. I am not the most experienced mum, but I hope my post can help you someway.

We have some experience with paci. Many times I was sure that paci was an issue, but now think in a different way. In our experience, when DS has an issue during night (teething, pain, discomfoprt of any kind) he wakes up and he just need paci to go back to sleep. The causality is other way around, since he has a discomfort he needs paci to go back to sleep not viceversa.
IMHO it is tricky to understand what causes what it can take time for you to understand.

About NW to eat, DS did them for very long. I was very jealous of mums who had babies doing just 1 NW to eat at 3,5mo or 4mo! I had to accept that he needed to eat a lot, especially when I was breastfeeding.

About short naps, we have had tons of them and we still get some now at almost 15mo. Our short naps are always of 30min, either OT or UT. When DS was 3mo I started following EASY and I become familiar with OT and UT. I needed to keep same A time, but to reduce all stimuli. DS was prone to OT but this was solved by doing very low key activities and maintaining same A time. This still happens when he is in very stimulating environments. I can't put him to sleep too early even when he is obviously OT. I need to wait and try to keep him quiet or better to have stimulating activities later in his A time.
When DD was 4mo, in case of short naps I just kept on APOP up to 3 naps during the day, one every two hours, hoping for the best. I put him in the sling and go for a walk almost every two hours. Actually I tried to make a longer nap only with the first one/two of the day because it was too stress for me. As Fleur pointed out, being in a dark room doing shush-path _every_ nap was preventing me to enjoy DS.

Good luck!