4 S's - 'Sitting' - how to make it effective

[Jules77]

Hi,

My DS2 is now just over 2 weeks old. I used EASY with DS1 from about 5 weeks and had him into a good routine early on and he is now a great sleeper.

As a result I have been using EASY from day 1 with DS2. He eats very well (has only ever gained weight) and seems content with 3 hours between feeds.

However, he is rather difficult to settle (day and night). We are trying to follow the 4s ritual. He isn't particularly happy with the swaddle and is very strong so we are persisting with that. My query relates to the 'Sitting' part of the ritual. I understand what it is trying to achieve. He gets nice and relaxed, almost asleep, then I can put him into his basket and he can fall asleep on his own.

However, I have found that at this early stage I need to hold him sitting until he is well asleep (probably around 20 minutes to be on the safe side) before putting him down. Then, as a general rule he will sleep for approx. 2 hours (although this morning woke after 45 mins....).

Is 'sitting' for this long at this stage going to cause a problem later when I want him to learn to self settle? Also, at what stage should I try to get him to self settle and how (on the basis of what I'm doing now).

I'm very conscious of not getting into bad habits. Family and friends keep telling me I'm fussing over nothing, he is very young and I should just take him out in his pram to get him to sleep, but I don't want to fall into any accidental parenting.

Your thoughts greatly appreciated. I've only just signed up to this site, so apologies that my profile is somewhat lacking. I will get some more info online soon.

Many thanks

Jules 

[Kellyjs]

Hi and welcome to the boards 

Congrats on your new LO! Tbh hun I think you're doing great. It really is vv early. I too pd after I knew DD was in to deep sleep at 20mins or so at this age. Mine too didn't like the swaddle so I didn't bother after a couple of tries. The swaddle just helps with the jolts as they're going into deep sleep, but if you're holding him up to that point he may not need it? It's totally up to you hun.

At this age I would just concentrate on establishing the EASY routine as much as you can. Even feeding to sleep is inevitable at this age here and there, but if you can keep a rough pattern that'll help in the long term.

I think it was when DD was around 4-5wks old I tried putting her down for the first nap of the day awake but drowsy. Didn't work all the time but I got a few in there  . Wrt the sitting part, eventually you'll be able to reduce that time sitting little by little until you can put him down drowsy but awake. It's a nice softly, softly approach which I think works well. You're still keeping to the same wind down, just reducing the time a little.

Accidental parenting has got us all through here and there hun we actually have a phrase for it APOP. Accidental parenting on purpose. Basically when a LO is OT, OS or just going through teething or a nap transition, we use any means necessary to get them to sleep  . So don't be too afraid of it hun. My DD was completely resistant to APOP which made things hard when it came to dropping naps! All I'm saying is, you're on the right track, he will learn independent sleep, but don't be too afraid of AP.

I'll post some links for you to have  a read through, do pop back though if you have any questions at all xx

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Starting EASY - all you need to know and more!

[Jules77]

Thanks for such a prompt and detailed response, it is much appreciated. Will keep going as we are and hope it continues. 

[Kellyjs]

Honestly hun, you're doing brilliantly. There will be plenty of times in the coming months when things start to a little off track, enjoy the baby cuddles whilst you can. I know you've got another LO too, many have found a baby carrier or sling really helps with trying to get out and about xx