Meltdowns caused by ebt

[Aishi]

Not sure if this is right place mods so feel free to move...

Dd is 3y8 mo, hasn't napped since 2.5yo and has only just started 2 full days at nursery and half day one day a week. She's spirited and prone to meltdowns and tantrums so I'm used to them! But these latest ones are clearly cos she's OT/OS due to nursery so I was wondering if ebt has worked for anyone at this age? And is it worth the battle to get her to have an ebt? Her bt is set at 7 so wd Is done by 6.50...however I tried ebt today which meant stop playing by 6 and she had an epic meltdown even tho I gave her plenty warnings to finish up with her mosaics. I knew she was ot cos usually she's ok to transition when she's had plenty of warnings and we've arranged a compromise I.e finish up for tonight and we will do mosaics together Tom....but tonight was disastrous as I ended up taking her kicking and screaming to bed. By the time she was calm she was asleep by 6.40 so not really as ebt as I was aiming for (6.30)...

Sorry for the rambling...any thoughts?

Tia xx

[Katet]

My 2 were both nightmares in the early weeks of  starting preschool & School & I found that it was more important to have their "relaxing" activities than to worry about extra sleep as it was more the mental tiredness than physical tiredness that was in play, so things like longer or earlier baths, spending more time sitting & reading stories, snacks & big drink the moment I picked them up from preschool  were more helpful than hurrying them along for early bed. Both have always been early risers & so they didn't tack sleep on in the morning, but would struggle with going to bed earlier because they could both read the clock from 3yo & so knew what time it was.
So for us it was more about managing the time that they were awake as opposed to trying for too big a change in times.  That said both of them tended in those early stages to do a catch up nap on days they didn't go to preschool or weekend when they started school, often it would be in the car on an outing, but that was how the sleep got caught up.

[koe2moe]

Aishi, it sounds to me that the meltdown was caused by her plan and focus being interrupted, rather than by EBT.  She had her mind set on doing something fun and then she had to stop midway.  Was yesterday her full day at school?  Even though she is OT or just tired, but perhaps doing something she likes is relaxing for her. 

It is difficult to set a black/white line to how to implement earlier bedtime.  For DS when he was that age dropping nap, the difference would be 5 mins earlier to bed, not more.  Experiment it and be slightly flexible.  Lots of hugs and this phase passes very quickly.  xx

[creations]

I found that it was more important to have their "relaxing" activities than to worry about extra sleep as it was more the mental tiredness than physical tiredness that was in play, so things like longer or earlier baths, spending more time sitting & reading stories, snacks & big drink the moment I picked them up from preschool  were more helpful than hurrying them along for early bed.

This.  The only time I did EBT really was with DS's agreement, on the odd occasion I asked if he'd like an extra sleep and to go to bed 15 mins earlier or if he'd like a lie in in the morning (if it was a non-nursery day that is) and I shifted his morning lights by say 20-30 mins later.
Even now a year on, he is tired from full time school but those activities at home appear to be more important than ever, for DS it's colouring, jigsaws, dot to dots, quizzes in magazine or activity books or even TV, he is using that as wind down time and wouldn't be happy to have it cut short even though he's super tired.

[Aishi]

Ok thanks ladies! Think I goofed up then esp as ebt backfired! She was up at 6.15 which rarely happens. I thought she would tack on as she always has done in the past!

Oh well hey ho you live and learn!

[creations]

I goofed up then

Most of my parenting is goofing up it's that's any consolation 

all we can do is try our best, hey?  and then it either works or it's a bust.

[Aishi]

Thanks hon it is

Fwiw she was much calmer at bt today- it wasn't a nursery day but we had been busy so we did puzzles in pm which seemed to help. Hopefully she catches up tonight so I can have a lie in too!

[Aishi]

Ok so something needs to change. She woke at 6.15 the night I posted, 5.15 yesterday (think she dozed off briefly till 7) and 5.45 today . What gives?

She's my spirited one who loves her sleep. I'm pretty sure it's not a need for less sleep- she's horrible when she hasnt had enough sleep. Usually she needs 12h night to wake up happy....should I change something here? Bt is set at 7 and she is at nursery full days Mon & Tues, half day Wed...