5 week old - can't get to sleep or stay asleep

[labrodyk]

Would anyone be able to shed some light on our EASY for today. Audrey is cranky and difficult to settle tonight and keeps waking through naps and at bedtime. I'm clearly getting something wrong. The only nap we've been able to get sort of right is the first morning one.
I'm also not sure how often to feed overnight and in the early morning. I keep giving her the dummy rather than a feed which I don't think is right but she isn't keen on her bottle in the morning even after replugging her for another hour.


E: 6:00pm
S: 6.30pm; woke after 40 minutes but resettled after 15 minutes
NF: 10.30pm
NF: 1.45am
NW: 4.45am; replugged dummy

WU: 5.45/6.00am
E: 6:00am (80ml)
A
S: 7.00 - 9.24. Woke several times  but managed to resettle with dummy herself

E: 9.30 (100ml)
A
S: very cranky but wouldn't settle at 10.30 in pram. Put in cot at 11 and slept 45 minutes waking and crying on/off I tried to resettle with dummy until 12.20

E: 12.30 (50ml)
A
S: 1.10-2.05pm. Awake, replugged dummy asleep 2.20-3.20

E: 3.30 (120ml)
A
S: grizzly and tired 4.20 - tried to settle in ergo whilst making dinner but wide eyed yet tired. Put into cot at 4.55 but woke at 5.30. Lay awake until 5.50 with dummy.
A: bath at 5.50

E: 6.10 (100ml)
S: 6.45pm. Asleep at 7.00 but keeps waking, dropping dummy, laying in cot wide eyed or crying still at 8.00pm. Asleep shortly after but woke at 8.45 but mouthed dummy back into her mouth.

NF: 11.30 (120ml)
NF: 3.00 (120ml) - frantic, gulping, spilling milk, restless
NW/NF: 5.00 (50ml). fed the same as at 3am, lay in bed with hiccups wide awake.

What am I doing wrong here? She's so miserable and tired.

[labrodyk]

I'm also struggling with night feeds. The first pre-midnight feed is relaxed, calm and she'll fall asleep quickly or settle as we're laying her back down. The second feed post midnight (usually 3hrs since last feed) is frantic, wide-eyed, gulping and spilling more milk out her mouth than she actually drinks. She cries whilst burping and is desperate to keep sucking. There's no sleepy, satisfied afterwards and she goes back into her cot with dummy, completely wide-eyed awake, usually dropping the dummy and fussing for its return. What is going on? The same thing happens when she wakes usually 2hrs later which is why I've been giving the dummy rather than a feed at 4 or 5. It's such a stressful night coupled with the crappy days...

[lily_layne]

(((hugs))) I just skimmed your posts and don't have much time to respond right now but I wanted to say try not to think of it as getting it "right" - that puts a lot of pressure and stress on you. It is normal for things to be all over the place with a newborn, especially a refluxer. You are doing the best that you can and that is enough.

I will pop back on tonight and take a closer look.

[labrodyk]

sorry, I don't mean "right" I just mean I'd like to be able to enjoy my gorgeous girl and I can see that she's struggling but my attempts to help her get the sleep and food she needs seem futile.

So after her 5am feed, she took from 5.30-6.00 to get back to sleep. She then woke at 7.40 but drank 30ml when I offered a top up feed - again very restless on the bottle. She yawned a lot and was fussy from 8am! I put her down just before 8.30 and whilst she dropped the dummy a couple of times she's still asleep at the 2 hour mark.

Gosh I'm SO confused lol, but thank you for helping. No rush at all.

[lily_layne]

Nothing in your EASY really stands out. I do think it's ok to give her the paci at night - if she's taking it and going back to sleep for an hour or more than she likely wasn't very hungry and just needed to suck. I found with my DS (who didn't have reflux) that if I fed him too often at night, it made things worse - some wakings he did just need the paci replugged. We also have many BTs like the one you described - I think it's just part of the new baby package.

[grace annes mommy]

Honestly, looks very similar to the days we're getting except your naps are better.  With the frantic feeds, is she gulping air?  My DD has been doing a lot of this especially at night.  At night, she gets really sloppy.  Almost like she can't remember how to suck.  As you said, not a peaceful drinking a bottle back to sleep.  Gulping and spilling.  The only things that i've found slightly helpful is lots of thorough burping and motion while she's drinking.  So sitting in the rocking chair or if she's a real mess, walking and bouncing.  Ya know, basically an aerobic exercise in the middle of the night. 

[labrodyk]

Oh wow ladies, thanks so much for the support!!

Unfortunately poor Audrey has been awake since 2.30pm and I've only just got her to sleep (I'm still patting her with my arm stuck between the cot bars) at now 7pm!! That's 4.5h A!! I'm really struggling and so is she ;( she's only drunk maybe max 60ml (2oz) per feed today too which hasn't helped.

I tried to settle in the carrier and she wouldn't have a bar of it. Swing too. In my arms she would fall asleep but not stay asleep.

ETA: woke after 40 minutes wide awake like she'd slept for 5 hours. Just keeps spitting the dummy out which DH and I are replacing constantly. **sigh**

[grace annes mommy]

Oh no! Poor Audrey and poor you!  Sounds like something's bugging her don't you think?  Reflux flare? plus massively OT I'm sure.  I hope she settles soon and you all get some sleep!

[labrodyk]

There's definitely something wrong! She didn't stay asleep until after 9pm and then woke at 11pm from a feed. Woke again at 2.45 and fed but then woke every hour until 6 when I fed her but she just cried and wouldn't go back to sleep until I finally settled her on her tummy at 8.30am and she's asleep now at 11am.
Her feeding is horrendous and she's not burping so I think gas or tummy problems are at play but if this is exacerbated by the reflux, I'm not sure.

Just trying to battle through!

[grace annes mommy]

Oh yuck!!!  We had a similar night a few nights ago and thinking back I think it was gas.  It sounds like your LO feeds like mine with lots of gulping and I've realized she's getting lots of air bubbles.  She pulls off the bottle and cries and I've finally worked out that she needs a good hard burping.  Then she's settle and feed again.

Have you tried mylocin or gripe water?  Not sure if they really work but worth a try.

What kind of bottle have you ended up using?

I wonder about a milk intolerance since she's still unsettled.  Have you seen much improvement with the reflux formula?

[lily_layne]

until I finally settled her on her tummy

Both of my LOs slept better on their tummies. I was quite comfortable letting them as they had very good head control.

[labrodyk]

I wish she'd settle on her tummy all the time! Big issue now is getting her to stop crying when she goes into her cot. Dummy in her mouth and she's still crying plus she's hysterical if she falls asleep and wakes when it's gone.

She's feeding 3 hourly overnight but they are still the most horrible feeds - gulping it and spilling it everywhere, rooting around for more and crying when I take the bottle away and try to burp her.  What I can't work out what to do is the morning feed and wakeup time.

Today was a night feed at 4.45 and then she woke at 6.40. I tried to dummy her but she was wide awake. I got up after a little while with her but she was just as sloppy with her milk and wasn't hungry. I put her down at 8.15 and she slept for 40 minutes and then no amount of dummy or settling was going to work. Tried the swing and she sat in it with her dummy for 40 minutes before falling asleep for 10 minutes. Fed at 11am and she still won't settle for a sleep in any position although stops crying when I pick her up

Saw the paed and he's not even convinced it is reflux and thinks I have a loud baby who has a settling problem and is hungry! He increased her dosage for the week as a trial so will see what happens. Also told me to take her off reflux formula so I've done that now too.

 
I've given her gas drops and gripe water and changed bottles a million times. I tried dr Browns and mam anti colic bottles but she couldn't latch to the teats so I went back to pigeon brand bottles/teats or mam bottles with pigeon teats. I'm using a variable flow nipple and she still spits out the milk despite being able to control the flow.

I'm at a bit of a loss and so unsure of how to get her to level out a bit - should I start being a tad stricter with some level of routine? Where do I even start - especially in the morning if she doesn't sleep long enough after the last feed to take her up to her first feed of the day?

[lily_layne]

should I start being a tad stricter with some level of routine?

No, I don't think so. I think it's a matter of just rolling with what she throws at you for a bit longer.

(((hugs)))

[labrodyk]

Gosh, ok. It's hell poor thing just can't stay asleep whether I have her in bed UT, OT or spot on time.

[grace annes mommy]

Why is the paed unsure it's reflux?  What's his take on the way she's feeding - gulping and spilling?

Have you been on the bottle you're using for a while now consistently?  I recently switched my DD's bottle and for a bit was swapping back and forth between the old and the new.  Now looking back, I realize that she was having a lot of trouble switching back and forth.  Now it's been a couple weeks on the same nipple and things have improved a bit.

I think all you can really do when they have a 5am ish bottle is top up the best you can when they wake up to carry them over thru the 1st nap.  Lately, my DD has been waking at 6am to eat then dozing til 7am.  I'll give her a top up around 7:30ish.  She usually does a short nap first thing (can't seem to extend it!), and is then ready for proper feed when she wakes up or soon after.

I wouldn't go with a stricter routine, no.  But are you noticing any patterns?  Like times of day she tends to sleep longer, etc?  Our routine is a mess, but I've found that right now my LO will sleep in the ergo for a solid 2+ hours in the afternoon til about 4/4:30.  It's helped me knowing this as she tends to catnap the rest of the day and I feel like I'm just settling for short naps all day long.  She's also settled into a 10am, 1pm, 4pm feeding schedule pretty much regardless of what time she feeds first thing in the a.m.  Are you finding any patterns like that?