Boot camp beginning - please help!

[murphy76]

Hi,

We've received intermittent advice before but now is the start of boot camp for our 12mth old DS3 lol, and it's gonna be tough but just want to make sure I am going the right thing.

DS3 has never really sttn, we put it down to illnesses, teething, a variety of things, and as bad parents we've always given him a bottle when he wakes as he's so loud, panic is in case he wakes 5yr old DS1 or 3yr old DS2....

So... He generally wakes between 5-6am for the days, 1-1hr30mins morning nap after 4hr A time, 30 min afternoon nap after 4hr A time and then BT another 330-4hrs

NIghts look like either a NW AT 11/12 then 3/4 or else 3,4,530 then up for the day.

He obviously can do stretches of 8-10hrs at night, but just when we think we have a great day time with naps and A times, we get multiple NWs and it's always an EW, 6am at best.  He is on solids and usually eats pretty well, has a bottle in the morning, early afternoon and before bed, so it can't possibly be hunger that is causing the NWs.

Basically, how do I tackle this? It does look like he's in the middle of 2-1 transition but he wakes so early he can't possibly survive on one yet. Am I right in tackling NWs before starting to move to 1 nap?

We have tried weaning at night, usually one of the bottle feeds is Mostly water, but never got much further than this.

Is 1.5-2 HR daytime sleep enough, over 2 naps? ( we have tried changing big/small nap around to afternoon but no difference) 4 HR A time in between naps right? Is it just a case of cold turkey with the feeding at night after a NW, walk in/walk out best for this if not feeding?

Sorry to ramble but we are quite literally at breaking point. DH is a good support dealing with the other two when they wake, but neither of us are sleeping much in between the various NWs and it is taking its toll....

Any advice, sharing of past experience or pointers greatly received.

Thanks in advance!

[LRS431]

Hi there, sorry I don't have much advice but wanted to offer support as my daughter is also 12 months and feeds several times a night and wakes early. Last night was our first night of night weaning. I was up with her for hours settling her but refused to feed her which made her very cross.  Are you wanting to night wean altogether?

[MasynSpencerElliotte]

Honestly I would tackle the 2-1 and the nw's all at once. I think a lot of the nw's are probably due to habit if he is used to being fed (how does he fall asleep at nap time and bedtime?) but with still having two naps a day it may be encouraging that ew. We switched to one nap once they could reasonably do 4.5/5 hrs A but you could also try alternating days of one and two naps or cutting the shorter nap back even more and offering the catnap in the am and a longer afternoon nap.

[murphy76]

Hi guys,

Thanks for the support!

DS3 is bottle fed now and I do want to stop him bottle feeding at night, and to be honest we are close to him dropping daytime bottles too, at least we were at this stage with his brothers.

Well done getting through that first night LRS431!

Certainly happy to tackle both at the same time MSE. We had managed the get him over yesterday morning until 7am, which was a first, and he had a 2hr 10mim nap until 110pm so thought we would try 1 nap and put him down at 630pm. We learned that 5.5hr A time is way too much for him as he woke 7 times last night! Sometimes we just gave him water or medecine as he has a thickly throat, but there was two bottles in there as well. I hope it's habit that he's waking as that will be easily broken, it's just the timings of the NW can be different which made me think it's not.

He goes over by himself at naps and BT every now and again, but there is usually a bottle not long before that so not sure if this even counts as independent?

It sounds like we need to get his A time up first then, he is at 4 HR A at the minute, what increments can you increase this in daily? In the past it just feels he is so tired coming up to 4hr A time after an unsettled night...

So take a week ( or longer?) and get his A time up to 4.5hrs then start alternating days or 1 and 2 naps? And When this begins go cold turkey on the nightfeeds to eliminate idea of habit? What's best way to resettle or encourage Him getting over himself at this age without feeding?

Thanks!

[MasynSpencerElliotte]

I mean habit as in he wakes during a light cycle and is used to being fed and so expects that when he wakes, not that the times themselves are habits. The nw's might improve on their own as you progress to one nap. We kept water in a spill proof sippy for nw. Not sure if wi/wo or gradual withdrawal will be the way to go for settling.

[murphy76]

Right, thanks for that.