PU/PD for a 8 month old and breastfed baby

[Apple001]

Hello,
My DD has problems with independent sleeping. After December 10th I'm on a break from work in addition  DH is on board with sleep training, so I want to start PU/PD.  I read the FAQ on PU/PD and I have some questions/issues:

1) DD still has a lot of NFs.  Our pediatrician says that we should go cold turkey and do not feed her till her usual wake time. DH agrees with her. I feel like it is too cruel.

2) Originally I thought that at least we would spread NFs out: at least 4 hours apart. However I was not sure what to do in this situation: I do PU/PD and she has not settled yet, it's been let say 4 hours since the last feeding, so do I feed her?  I feel that if I feed her, it will send her a confused message. If I don't feed her, I'm afraid she is hungry.

3) The same question above but for the naps. She can easily give me 4 hours or even more of Awake time. So do I feed her?

4) DD will be 8 months by that time, so I will be adjusting the PU/PD without the actual PU/PD (she is not standing yet). So I'll just try to soothe her using patting and words. How about a lullaby?

5) Currently her crib is leveled right next to mine with a side down, so that if she is awake she can crawl on our bed or I can crawl into hers to nurse her. Because it's becoming not safe to have her crib like that, I would like to move it away from my bed (unfortunately still in the same room, but in a different corner). I'm debating whether I should do it at the start of PU/PD (so that if she has one big transition) or do it after she learns to settle herself. My only concern is if I decide to move it later, may it cause some sleeping issues?

6) Is there a difference when I should start PU/PD: I mean for naps or nighttime? I feel that I should start with nighttime, because she is more tired and it would be easier for her to fall asleep on her own. Or am I missing something?

7) Anything I can do to prepare myself, DH or DD?




P.S. I know there was a sub-forum on PU/PD which recently got closed. Is it possible to reopen it - just for reading? Or at least move the PU/PD success stories out of it? I need some encouragement that PU/PD does work before I start implementing it.


P.P.S. Backstory: DD is 7.5 month old, BF + a little of BLW + a little of purees/cereal (Solids are not going very well, so her main calorie intake is BF.)
We started BW at 6 weeks. Used Paci to help her fall asleep for naps + BFed to sleep for bedtime. Everything went pretty well: she was waking up 2-3 times a night for a feed. There were a couple of night when she had only one NF.
Around 5.5-6 month we started having problems with naps. I tried to extend the naps but no luck. At the same number of NWs started to increase.
Around 6 month she got sick and we did BFed and rocked her to sleep. She didn't take the Paci because of congested nose. However after the recovery she was taking Paci again. The number of NFs increased up to 7 a night and 30 minute naps appeared.  While I was tackling her naps, I introduced a top-up 30 minutes before her nap time. But it didn't help.
At 7 months she got her first two teeth, and as soon as the second one showed up she stopped taking Paci. No Paci - no falling asleep. So I started nursing her to sleep and nursing during sleep to prolong naps - so lots of snacking. (I know I was supposed to start PU/PD, but I'm a working mom and the other two caregivers were not on board.)
You can also find my topics in the Naps and Breastfeeding subforums with more details.

[nevinsmama]

Hi there! There is a pile of information in the FAQ Sleep section:
Pick Up/Put Down (PU/PD) - Everything you ever needed to know!
Great stuff to help make sure you are appropriately prepared and realistic about your goals and what all.

OK, 1: Yes, I would not go totally cold turkey on the NFs, especially with a BF baby, my 2 still had a feed 4 hours in and an early morning feed at that age.

2: Stick with it, even if it means going past the 4 hour mark ( be strong, it will get better!) until LO goes back out, even if only for 10 minutes, THEN feed.

3:If she can do that much A, I might offer a top off feed before you do wind-down so LO is full and happy but not drowsy. And yes, keep going until she goes out!

4: Yes, this is more of a "work with me here" process. Scroll down to the "Age appropriate adaptations" section on the PUPD link I dropped for you.

5:I would just go ahead and move it. It will be OK.

6: I would pick an evening and start then for BT and go from there when YOU feel ready and have some support from your DH.

7: SHe can do it! So can you! It really will be OK. When DD and I did PUPD ( truly shocking sleeper) I really had to get my head around it all so I posted regularly on here, made myself a chart so in my sleep deprived stupor I could see that this would work and no going back and celebrate ALL improvements! I noted down number of wakings, when, how long to settle, how many PUs and so on and could see the progress. It is great that your DH is on board, and let him do his part too and he may need to listen to you rant about it all! I would not change people in the middle of trying to settle LO, but let him take the next waking so you can get some rest.

I see that lilylayne has been looking over your day and it looks like you are on the right track.

Hang in there, don't give up before the miracle! Things WILL get worse before they get better but it will be worth it and we are with you all the way!

[Apple001]

nevinsmama, Thank you so much for the reply and encouragement. I got some fantastic help here from Ali and MasynSpencerElliotte (on the breastfeeding board) and lily_layne (on the Naps board).

I have already looked over these FAQ on PU/PD. I probably would need to go over it + Tracy's interview again (just in case).

Some comments:

2. It is like a dreamfeed, right? 

7. The sleep log idea is wonderful. I did it around 4 month (when we had 1-2-3 night wakings a night), but then I stopped because I couldn't remember when her night wakings were. I'm only keeping a log of night feedings using the app on my phone.



One more question: How should I nurse her for bedtime? Nurse her before the bedtime routine?

[nevinsmama]

You are very welcome!
2) I would surely wait until the next waking, if LO is getting hungry she will likely only go out for 20 minutes or so and then you can feed her when she wakes.

I would nurse her just as part of your BT routine, I would nurse DD after bath, jams, and then maybe her story and song AFTER nursing just to be sure she was doing the going to sleep part on her own from a calm but non-drowsy state. Hope that makes sense.

[Apple001]

nevinsmama, but wouldn't it be confusing to DD: sometimes I feed her upon waking, sometimes I do not? I thought consistency is the key.

[nevinsmama]

If it is at least 4 hours, then feed her, there is a distinct chance a 8 month old is having genuine hunger at that time, hope that helps! She may, in all fairness, be a bit hungry in between times if she is used to having more frequent feeds, but she will adapt.