I think we might have to cut them cold turkey now. It will be rough for a few night but it will get better. She's old enough not to need them now. Could you have someone else take over the night shift for a couple of nights at the weekend? It might be easier for them to resettle her than you, as you offer the feed. Perhaps a full shake up could be what's needed? Alternatively if you're up for it, I would stick to it and don't ever back down. Do it once and you'll be back to square one I'm afraid. How do you feel about that?
As the protesting may get quite loud, I'd try and settle her in the cot first using your words. Just don't start something you're not prepared to carry on with like rocking as that'll just be substituting one prop for another iykwim. Try and keep as calm as you can. Use your words as much as possible as they really do understand more than we give them credit for at this age.
I think with the new routine the NW's should lessen in time anyway as I always had a strong suspicion she was UT. I want to also keep an eye on that last A as many bubbas don't like 5hrs either side of a nap, preferring to have one longer and one shorter A or vice versa.
What we have seen is that after a shortish night she can do 5hrs quite comfortably and that yields a 2hr nap. It may be that if she has a better night sleep she might do a bit longer.
The transition does take time and there will be NW's from that anyway, but I think if we just get rid of these feeds once and for all, it'll be better for you both long term. What do you think? Are you up for it? Normally what happens is that the first night is horrendous, second night a bit better, then we usually see a slight regression on day 3 or 4, then it gets much better again (just to for warn you
)l I'm here for you every step of the way xx