Author Topic: Predictable Unpredictability - Please help us!  (Read 50942 times)

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Offline labrodyk

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Re: Predictable Unpredictability - Please help us!
« Reply #390 on: July 13, 2016, 20:27:20 pm »
Thank you, I will start doing that. Could be food.

WU: 7.10
Nap 1: 9.40-11.25
Nap 2: 2.45-3.45ish
BT: 6.55; 7.10
NW: 4.50 crying. can't resettle her. Patted, held her in chair, co-sleep and still crying. She's very congested and her teeth are bulging but not cutting.
She fell back to sleep at 6.40, when should I wake her? It's 7.48 now.

I have NO idea what's going on but I have a super important appointment this morning and didn't need a cranky baby and an early wake up!!! Far out....
« Last Edit: July 13, 2016, 21:49:00 pm by labrodyk »



Offline becj86

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Re: Predictable Unpredictability - Please help us!
« Reply #391 on: July 14, 2016, 19:47:47 pm »
She's very congested and her teeth are bulging but not cutting.
I think all bets are off when teething and sick at the same time, poor poppet.

Best wishes for your important meeting! Do you have to take A with you? If so, I'd let her sleep as long as possible, give pain meds and cross fingers she's happy, otherwise I'd probably wake her and try to stick to normal day as far as possible.

Offline labrodyk

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Re: Predictable Unpredictability - Please help us!
« Reply #392 on: July 19, 2016, 05:31:35 am »
Hi Bec!! How are you??

A is still sick with runny nose (it's been over 3 weeks!) and her teeth are there but not cutting at all. Our afternoon nap has also been 40 minutes the past 2 days but she is SO miserable before it that I've put her down at the 3hr A mark? Is that too short/too long? How much should I shave off bedtime after 40 minutes? Should it be 2.5 A or 3? With a longer nap I've been doing up to 3.5hrs but I'm so confused at present. I'm also not sure if the short arvo naps are from teeth too but I've been giving meds. She has been trying hard and falling back to sleep every few minutes today, so I wasn't sure!

Last Saturday my parents minded her and she was so unsettled, dad had to pay her to sleep then when we got home around midnight she'd been crying with mum trying to settle for 1/2 an hour! Took a dose of nurofen and holding her in my arms until asleep for her to settle again! The next morning nap she did 4x40 minute sleep cycles for a nap of 2hrs40min!

Sunday
WU: ?
OOB: 7.00
Nap: 9.55; 10.00-12.40 (4x40min sleep cycles).
Nap: 4.00; 4.10-4.50
BT: 7.35; asleep 7.50 (no crying!).

Monday
WU: ?
OOB: 7.00
Nap: 10.0; 10.05-11.40
Nap: 2.50; 2.55-3.28
BT: 6.17; crying! Asleep 6.36

Tuesday
WU: 7.00
Nap 1: 10.03; 10.08 - 11.28
Nap 2: 2.30; 2.40 - 3.16, back to sleep until 3.38 then quite unsettled (asleep, awake, asleep, awake) until 3.50 chatting!
BT: ?? What should I do?


I did 6.30 and she's been crying for 25 minutes!! I've gone in and calmed her but she cries when I leave. Do I need to scale back dramatically after a short afternoon? 2.5hrs PD? These nights where she goes down crying and can't settle are horrible!
« Last Edit: July 19, 2016, 08:56:12 am by labrodyk »



Offline becj86

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Re: Predictable Unpredictability - Please help us!
« Reply #393 on: July 19, 2016, 09:08:48 am »
I'm well, life is running along at its usual crazy pace again :P

dad had to pay her to sleep
Wow, she's starting in business young!

These nights where she goes down crying and can't settle are horrible!
I still remember the misery :( They are horrible.

Ok, so I wonder if we make a framework for day length around the amount of sleep she gets in a day. She seems to like about 2:20-3hr day sleep and 11hr+ over night, yes? I think you're shortening the last A time a touch too much - she was upset but went to sleep reasonably quickly on Monday with 3hr A off a short nap. Today, you've done a 2.5hr A time off a 1:10 nap, albeit a bit broken. BT could well have been 7/7:30 tonight, I think.

Offline labrodyk

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Re: Predictable Unpredictability - Please help us!
« Reply #394 on: July 19, 2016, 09:30:38 am »
I'm well, life is running along at its usual crazy pace again
Oh I know the feeling!!

Wow, she's starting in business young!
LOL! I know you know I meant 'pat' but gosh i wish I could pay her!

Framework for the day - yes that sounds about right but I REALLY struggle with the last A! Saturday was a short 40 minutes and when my dad put her down at 7.30/45 she did the same thing she's done for me tonight, screamed!
She's only just fallen asleep herself now at 7.15pm. I was basing her A from when she first woke at around 3.30 so thought 3hrs A would be heaps!
It's so confusing also because then there's nights like Sunday night above and I woke her at 4.50 and she was back in bed without a peep at 7.35pm (only 2hr 45 A) and that was a day with that massive 2hr40min morning nap.
« Last Edit: July 19, 2016, 09:36:28 am by labrodyk »



Offline labrodyk

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Re: Predictable Unpredictability - Please help us!
« Reply #395 on: July 20, 2016, 05:40:26 am »
Today we only got 2x30 minute car naps! What should I do now for BT?

WU: 6.00
Nap 1: 9.50; 10.10-10.38
Nap 2: 1.40; 2.22-2.58. Popped back into her cot at 3.10 when we got home and she played until 4!
BT: 6.03; asleep 6.23. Very tired but didn't cry!

I just can't work out these A times anymore. Lol
« Last Edit: July 20, 2016, 09:10:48 am by labrodyk »



Offline becj86

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Re: Predictable Unpredictability - Please help us!
« Reply #396 on: July 20, 2016, 19:53:51 pm »
That's bizarre. How was she during the day?

Offline labrodyk

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Re: Predictable Unpredictability - Please help us!
« Reply #397 on: July 21, 2016, 06:54:29 am »
That's bizarre. How was she during the day?
totally frustrating too!
She was her usual self when out and about - smiling at everyone, looking around with her massive eyes. Although gets fussy in pram, shopping trolley and high chair and wants to be held. Same with in and out of car seat - has a good scream before either sitting there and chatting well past her normal A or continuing to cry until she falls asleep.

With H back at preschool today we were back into the nightmare that is drop off/ pick up. Our today played out like this;

WU: 6.00 ish.  Lay quietly but got upset and whinged until closer to 7.
OOB: 7.00am.
Nap 1: absolutely beside herself, crying in the car from 8.50. She was falling asleep as we arrived at kindy but then she was all smiles, crawling around playing with all the kids. Hopped back in the car and she cried but chatted and she fell asleep but only for 3 minutes at 9.45!!
Nap 2: 10.10; 10.15-11.25 (in cot)
Nap 3: 2.28; 2.34-3.30
BT: 6.25; crying off and on and won't settle. Finally asleep at 6.50.

This is really hard, should I try a different routine or longer/shorter A's? Hard with kindy drop off/pick up but at least the rest of the days might be better.

We've been doing a BT routine of;

Dinner, a bath/shower, bottle in the lounge room and then she insists on crawling and cruising around. After around 10-20 minutes we go and brush teeth, into sleeping bag, a cuddle and some lullabys and into bed. She either;
A) cries and continues to cry and need settling
B) is quiet but then can't settle and starts crying (not just mantra)
C) mantra cries briefly then falls asleep
D) quietly self settles.
Naps and bedtime she will always cry as soon as we enter her room but once she gets given her comforter whilst putting on sleeping bag and she'll start to suck her thumb but totally hit and miss on how long or if she settles!
« Last Edit: July 21, 2016, 08:53:15 am by labrodyk »



Offline labrodyk

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Re: Predictable Unpredictability - Please help us!
« Reply #398 on: July 22, 2016, 10:59:24 am »
And then there was today?!

WU: 6ish
OOB: 7.00
Nap 1: 9.30-10.00 in the car post bottle which she fed herself
Nap 2: 12.55; 1.00-2.30 in cot. No crying, self settled.
BT: 6.23. A few mantra cry outs but asleep 6.43.

I decided that if she can handle 3 hours after 30 minutes she could handle a lot more after a decent nap but I don't think that transcends to her morning, I feel like she's becoming a short morning a, long a to bed. Previously I've thought this the other way around but who knows!!

Saturday 23/7
WU: ? chatting 6.37
OOB: 7.15 (I fell back to sleep!)
Nap 1: 10.03; 10.08-11.25
Nap 2: 3.03; 3.13
^ we were in the car prior to this and I thought she'd fall asleep but no such luck.
BT:  ?

I'm just wondering if there is some kind of 'plan' I could attempt at sticking to in regards to nap length and A time between naps and bedtime? What your thoughts were on waking her from afternoon nap and if so, what A should I be aiming for? I'm starting to think that if second nap isn't starting until closer to 3, even if I give her 40 minutes she needs 3hrs to bed PD but anymore and we're looking at close to 4 which would bring us up to an 8pm bedtime which i'm not that keen on but could try and make it work if necessary except H is usually passed out asleep by 6.30/7pm at the latest!
« Last Edit: July 23, 2016, 05:34:35 am by labrodyk »



Offline becj86

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Re: Predictable Unpredictability - Please help us!
« Reply #399 on: July 24, 2016, 00:55:57 am »
I'm starting to think that if second nap isn't starting until closer to 3, even if I give her 40 minutes she needs 3hrs to bed
So cap the PM nap shorter and keep to ~3hr to bed PD.

I think I'd shoot for a long AM nap and short (cap to 30min, say) PM but be prepared for sometimes a short AM and allow for a long PM.


Offline labrodyk

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Re: Predictable Unpredictability - Please help us!
« Reply #400 on: July 26, 2016, 01:13:09 am »
thanks Bec...

I'm trying really hard to get the long am and short pm but she is absolutely MISERABLE through her first A. Even if we're out, cries constantly, wants to be held and doesn't fight me at all for nap PD but is sleeping only a little over an hour. I then feel terrible about waking from second nap but don't know what A before PD I should do if I do let her sleep. Yesterday's 2nd nap was short and A to bed was almost 3.5hrs, she tossed and whinged for over 30 minutes!

Her top teeth are cutting so I'm medicating and cuddling and offering what I can during A's and before sleep. Developmentally she's doing really well but we've run into the 'screaming and rolling/crawling/sitting during nappy changes and dressing' stage. She's crawling, pulling up, cruising but not happy to play with toys or her brother. She'll come crying/crawling to me and I'll lift her up, only for her to thrash and rub her eyes and get upset and want to get down. Wash, rinse, repeat. lol.

To be honest, I don't really know what A I should be aiming for based on nap length for any of our day?
« Last Edit: July 26, 2016, 01:27:06 am by labrodyk »



Offline becj86

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Re: Predictable Unpredictability - Please help us!
« Reply #401 on: July 26, 2016, 02:26:04 am »
She's at an age that's so variable its hard to know, yk? Average is such a big range. I'd just say not less than 3hr, so that's not a lot of help, sorry. Is there the possibility of a set BT if you're capping the second nap?

Offline labrodyk

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Re: Predictable Unpredictability - Please help us!
« Reply #402 on: July 26, 2016, 03:24:45 am »
Yep, I totally understand, I remember this stage (not so fondly) with H!

Set nap is a possibility, I guess it's just hard knowing whether the A is too long or too short given the rest of our days are so over the place. One night might be 3hrs; the next more. I'd love a set 7pm bed. I'm just getting anxiety each night at bedtime of what way she's going to go!  Today has been hit and miss and our bedtimes are incredibly variable. not asleep until 8pm last night and awake from 6.30ish with short naps today yet miserable her whole A times. Pain meds, cuddling, changing activities, snacks, food, milk, she just wanted to be held and then cried to be put down. Totally fickle. Not at all upset on PD for naps, fell asleep quickly each time. I don't mind rolling with the day as it comes but I find it really difficult judging her A's after short naps, after long naps, and how to do bedtime whether it's a long/short nap.

WU: 6.40ish
OOB: 7.00am
Nap 1: 9.35; 9.40-10.48
Nap 2: 1.55; 2.00 - 2.40. 2.45-2.48!
BT: we PD at 6 and she's crying. Too late?
« Last Edit: July 26, 2016, 08:09:05 am by labrodyk »



Offline becj86

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Re: Predictable Unpredictability - Please help us!
« Reply #403 on: July 26, 2016, 08:50:41 am »
I wouldn't have thought too late.

I see you have a new thread on naps. Happy to keep holding your hand here but don't want to get you confused, so happy also to drop this thread if you desire. I'm stepping down from modding in a couple of days and won't be around quite as much.

Offline labrodyk

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Re: Predictable Unpredictability - Please help us!
« Reply #404 on: July 26, 2016, 09:44:57 am »
I didn't think so either, the cried for 20 minutes and I went in and patted the mattress for 20 minutes and she fell asleep. No idea what that's about, poor thing is all ovet the place.

Thank you so much for helping me, you've been absolutely amazing. Let's put this post to bed, I don't want to take up any more of your valuable time.

Thank you again and good luck with your study.
xx