Predictable Unpredictability - Please help us!

[labrodyk]

Good evening Bec!

So I thought I'd be consistent with the shorter morning A and it backfired on me! Grrrr
I did the personality test for Audrey and she came out 'textbook' with a dash of 'touchy' and 'spirited'. The touchy and spirited being the sleeping part her awake personality is angelic if I'm honest. Such a massive change from DS who cried constantly...

Today looked like this;

DF: 10.30pm
NF: 4.00am (120ml)
WU: 7.00am
E: 7.15am (30ml!! Talk about effort, she just wasn't interested).
A:
S: 8.46; asleep 8.58 - 9.34am
Rs: attempted resettle ~10.00am. No luck.
A: went shopping.
E: 11.00am (120ml). At the shops. Was falling asleep on bottle.
A: more shopping and car home but didn't fall asleep
S: 12.12; asleep 12.16 - 2.16pm
E: 2.25 (110ml)
A:
S: 4.25, asleep 4.35 - 5.07. She didn't wake crying but looked around and sucked her hands to try and get back to sleep but I got her up at 5.15.
A:
E: 6.30 (120ml)
S: 6.45; asleep 7.00pm.

DF: 10.30 (110ml)
NF: 2.50 (120ml)

WU: 6.20. Whinging and crying
OOB/E: 6.30 (120ml)

What do you think? Should I do closer to 2hrs A this morning? She's so confusing.

[becj86]

As her nights get better, she may cope with the longer first A better, worth giving it a go again at 2hr given the UT waking and no resettle.

Nice nap in the middle there Doesn't it make a difference! That was a pretty long A time for her age.

Have you considered stopping the DF and just letting her wake for a feed at night? I reckon she might just wake the once and it would be more in the middle and she may then be more interested in that morning feed though if she's fine til WU from 1st nap, I'd probably not bother if you're happier going to bed after DF.

She is a bit of a puzzle, isn't she? We are making some progress though

[labrodyk]

I hope her nights get better soon, I'm feeling a little frazzled.

My concern with dropping the dreamfeed is that she'll return to what she was doing of waking between 12-2 and then again between 5 and 6. I don't mind starting the day at 6.30 but if she wakes at 6 it's hard to put her straight back down and then start the day at a decent time (I truly can't do 6am).

Napping is just ridiculous...I don't know what I'm doing or what she should be doing now. I put her down at 8.30 and she whinged and had a little cry until 8.40! Watching her on the monitor but I think this will be a short OT nap!

Are you sure we're making progress?! Lol.


..... Ok, so she pulled a 2hr nap this morning I had to wake her from! Eeeeek far out.

[becj86]

Yes, you're making progress. Here are a couple of things that weren't happening so much a week ago:
asleep at 7pm
2hr naps

Also, you're spending a lot less time resettling. That is good for both of you.

Yay for the 2hr nap this morning, now keep that next A time up at 2-2:15 and see what happens. FX!

[labrodyk]

You're right thank you.

Unfortunately we went out and it was a pram nap. She needs to have her swaddle up on so I did it up, covered the pram at 12.35 and she was asleep in 5 minutes. Can't ever get more than 40 minutes when out though so was awake at 1.20

[becj86]

That's ok, reduce next A time by 15min and stick to it, life happens, you both need to be able to roll with it

[labrodyk]

Well that was interesting. Into bed back at home at 3.10, asleep 3.20 after some crying but woke at 4pm. No crying for 15 minutes just lying and looking around. Crying and trying to resettle now, how do I play the rest of the evening?  What would you suggest for bedtime!? I'm so confused.

She was so tired at 6pm so I gave her a bath, top up feed and put her down and she fussed and cried for 15 minutes but fell asleep at 6.15pm.

[becj86]

Well, reasonable BT would be 6:15/6:30 unless she resettled. Of course you don't want BT too early if you don't want WU before 6:30.

Today just confirms to me that she is a long A time girl and maybe 2hr 1st and 2:15 for the others might work. Worth a try.

[labrodyk]

Thanks Bec! I completely agree. She's fallen asleep now...

Ok, I'll do 2hrs again tomorrow and push to 2hr15min. If she short naps or doesn't resettle do I do 15mins early? That's what I did today for that 3rd nap and she still short napped. lol. Far out she's annoying. Hahaha

She woke after 45 minutes at 7.00pm and can't resettle she was quiet and lay sucking fingers with eyes shut until 7.50 but when I went to pat her as she started to cry she just lay wide awake having a good little chat and a giggle!! I patted for ages and she wouldn't go to sleep so by 8.45 I fed her and she took 160ml. Put her back to bed but she doesn't seem to have much interest in sleeping....

[becj86]

Yeah, some LO's don't need any reduction in A time after a short nap, mine didn't. 15min seems to hit the spot for most children so that's what I advise first then tweak from there. That may be necessary once her A times are up where she needs them but you're going to have to be on the ball with her, as these are way higher than average, so she'll be dropping naps earlier than you might otherwise expect.

So she was UT at BT as well? Hmmm... lets get going on those longer A times and see what happens. We need to probably stick with those til Wednesday or Thursday just to make sure we're giving her enough time to extend the naps herself (sometimes when increasing A time, you still get UT short naps for the first day or two until LO's body gets used to the new A time and they sleep longer). Its good that we seem (touch wood) to have the morning reasonably sorted, its much easier to tweak smaller periods of time.

[labrodyk]

Hello Bec!

How are you today!?

After that feed at 9pm last night, Audrey slept

NF: 2.48
WU: 7.00am
Nap: 9.05, asleep 9.15-11.15am
E:
A:
S: 1.27; asleep 1.30 - 4.00


I can't quite work out how the rest of the day is meant to go if she takes a longer nap this afternoon! There isn't enough time between end of nap, 2hr15m A and then another 2.5hr A to bed will push BT up to 8pm or later. i'd really prefer this closer to 7pm but what are my options?!

ETA:
So she slept until 4pm. I figured I had a better chance of an earlier bedtime if I let her sleep. Would 6.30 be reasonable or closer to 7pm given the good naps?

[becj86]

You could cap the catnap at 30min which will probably make her a bit cranky but will reduce the A time to bed. You may find you have to adjust your expectations wrt night length - a 12hr night is unlikely for her. Something like 7:30-6:30 might be more realistic.

[labrodyk]

I see what you're saying... but if she did 2hrs from 1.30 that brings us up to 3.30. Another A time of 2hrs15 is then 5.45. Cap at 30mins, 6.15, then 2.5hrs A to bed is 8.45!!

Should I aim for 2.5hrs now from 4? So 6.30?

[labrodyk]

Well that was a fail.... Bath and a feed at 6.15 and she was practically fast asleep on the bottle (so didn't take a full feed). Into bed at 6.25 and now she's so upset and having difficulty settling. fell asleep at 6.40 but woke at 7.10 and has been restless since...

I was wondering; what would happen if I gave her two sleeps letting her sleep as long as she likes? Considering I woke her today, would that bring me closer to bedtime without super long A time?

Last night was;
DF: 10.30
NF: 2.00am <what is the point of the dreamfeed if she wakes here?>
NW: 5.50am screaming. Tried to resettle her but she was crying

OOB: 6.10
E: 6.15am (not interested)

[becj86]

Ok, so 2.5hr to bed seems a bit long since you're consistently getting those OT beginnings to your nights.

Did you wake her at 2hr for each of those naps? You could try letting her sleep and see how long she naps for and how your day looks then.

With that short CN, I was imagining something like this:
6:30 - WU
8:45 - nap
10:45 - WU
1pm - nap
3 - WU
5:15 - 30 min nap
7/7:30 - in bed asleep

DF: 10.30NF: 2.00am <what is the point of the dreamfeed if she wakes here?>

My guess would be that the DF was a different amount of time into her night sleep given she went to bed earlier and just happened at a different stage of sleep, possibly disturbing her pattern. Could also be that she didn't take the full feed at BT, so became hungry earlier in the night. She could be going through a growth spurt though uninterested in her morning feed doesn't support that possibility.

DF didn't work for us, it didn't push L's feed any later and I was losing sleep by staying up later enough to do the DF so I just PD for bed and went to bed when I usually would (8pm - yes, I know, that's a little unusual but I'm a morning person). Its certainly not something that works perfectly all of the time for everyone. It has been working for you though, I think, in which case, this could simply be an anomaly and she could well go back to sleeping a longer stretch post-DF tonight.