Wind down routines after dropping the nap

[K-JDA]

Hi all

First of all many thanks for all your help getting through the 1-0 - DS is 3 yrs 4 mo and we have got there in the end (just about) and the nap has gone except for the odd falling asleep in the car for 5-10 mins here and there.

We are keeping days to 12/12.5hrs and DS is doing some decent 11-12hr nights with overall sleep and nights gradually lengthening to between 11.5-12hrs. Yay for that after years of EWs!!

The main issue we are finding is how to avoid melt-down/keeping bedtimes low key when DS is just so tired come bedtime. During the week, after a full day at nursery, he is quite often too tired to have a bath/stories which have always been my go to bedtime ritual. If we are not careful he goes a bit hyper and we can have a horror OT bedtime, loads of stalling/call backs and general resistance to sleep (he has always been a bit like this (touchy sleeper/plus spirited) but much worse when OT).

We are just trying to roll with it as he grows into having no nap plus conscious we are nearing a 1/2 birthday where sleep is always affected and loads more reassurance needed etc.

Just after some tips on nice low key bedtime routines to get us through this latest stage.

TIA!

[michaeljacknnugg]

When we first dropped the nap he used to crash out whilst drinking his milk, he was so exhausted. Poor thing. But later I think we did stories in DS's bed with him so we could snuggle. Skip the bath and do more stories?

[Haribo2012]

We did much earlier bath and reading in bed....loved the asleep for 6.15pm days if you can get away with no bath and a quick wash I'd go for that.
My DS loves a bath snd is always covered in food or paint after nursery so we still did a bath and if we tried to skip it he'd cry for it later!

[Scottishmummy]

We are at a similar point with our DS who is 2yr9mo and similar in temperament to yours (always been touchy/spirited about sleep & does not cope well with tiredness at all).

I have to admit that we've used some TV to help with relaxing after a busy day & filling time to bath & bedtime and avoiding the hyperactivity. I see you're also in the UK? CBeebies bedtime hour  is quite good.  We do switch it off an hour before sleep time though then do bath & stories to try to reduce the "light at night" effect.

[creations]

TV and CBeebies vote here!  I always recorded the calmest programmes so that I had an entire library of suitably calm progs to watch during BT hour.  We usually had 20 mins TV but if he needed more down time he got more. I happily let him watch TV as soon as he got in from nursery because I knew he needed to zone out and for him it was one of the best ways, also because he is the character that uses the TV to chill out and then turns it off himself when he is ready to do something else.

We did not do BT stories until very very recently (almost 5yo, maybe started 4.5?) but instead had bath time story, DS played in the bath and DP read the story, showed the pictures.  After bath it was into dim room, cuddle and song and then into bed. Mine couldn’t have handled stories actually AT bed time even though he adored books during the day.
DS has a calm music CD left on to go to sleep to, maybe that would be something your DS would like as an alternative WD?

Might be worth seeing if bath time can move earlier, before dinner?  It can be too stimulating for some whilst others find it perfect for WD.

[K-JDA]

Hi and thanks for the replies 

TV is good for a wind down for DS too - agree it needs to be low key watching!

The issue with the bath is that we don't get in from work/nursery til 5.30 and then aiming for 7pm bed and a bit of time with us as he really needs lots of cuddles/mummy cup filled up as I work full time  . Could try an earlier bath but he doesn't do well with routine change so might not like it! Am tending to do more of a strip-wash by the sink then baths on weekends when he is less tired or if he is up for it one night in the week too.

He loves books at bedtime but can take it or leave it at the moment if he is getting towards very tired. I like the idea of a calm music CD - any recommendations?

I have recently started a sit and cuddle in the chair in his room after we have turned out the light and said night night to Daddy. Will start to offer a song but he might do better with quiet then.

Thanks again for your thoughts!

[creations]

I like the idea of a calm music CD - any recommendations?

My recommendation is to select something you (you and DH) are willing to listen to over and over and over...and over...
Mine had the same song sung by me every nap and night for the first 12 or 18 months I think it was, then the same song on CD every nap and night for the next 6 months (with me also singing) I then let the CD run on from that song. Then we switched song to the first on the CD and he has had it every night for something like 3 years now.  So when I say something you are willing to listen to repeatedly it really could be for several years!  We hear DS's over the monitor every night after BT.
Ours is a CD I asked DP to make for me before DS was born, all tracks I will never tire of (thank goodness).  DP did at one time put together a BT CD for DS which we tried for a short while but DS never really got into it and asked for us to switch back.

[K-JDA]

Thanks Creations - I like the idea of making a CD - will give it a go!

Think we have hit a developmental leap now too this week (nearing 3.5ys) - major SA, wants me to sit by his door at bedtime and NWs the last 2 nights. I think the more cuddly wind-down is going to be really helpful with this to give extra support as he really struggles during these phases. Always something new to contend with!!!

[creations]

Oh yeah, we've just been through a couple of months worth of the birthday leap stuff and SA as mine approach 5yo.  He's only just coming out of it.  At least you know what it is and that it will pass rather than fear that this goes on for ever