Author Topic: How to start EASY with Older Sibling?!  (Read 472 times)

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Offline FrankiesMom12

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How to start EASY with Older Sibling?!
« on: February 16, 2016, 19:58:50 pm »
Hi Ladies,

This is my second post today, my first was on the toddler board for my 3-year-old, and this one is for my 2-month-old.  I am completely and totally and entirely at my wit's end.  I do not understand how it's feasible to get on an EASY routine when there is an older sibling in the mix.  It doesn't help that my 3-year-old has been ill since the beginning of January, so he's far clingier and needy than usual, but really, I'm so exhausted and frustrated I could sit down and cry.

My DD turned 2 months on February 6, and we are still in the land of the opposite of EASY.  She wants to be held 90% of the day, will eat every 1.5 hours, and only cat naps unless she's in my arms or in her car seat in a moving vehicle.  Oh, also...when I say she wants to be held 90% of the day, I mean not only does she want to be held but she wants me to be walking.  My back is on FIRE by 9:00 am.  To make matters worse, since my son has been so sick, we are housebound most days.

I feel like every time I turn around they are impacting each other's sleep.  For example, I finally got DD to fall asleep today, I put her down so I could DS down for his "nap" (which is in quotation marks because he doesn't really nap at all anymore...but I at least put him in his room by himself for awhile), when I go back to her she's spit up all over her bed and wide awake because of it.  Then, I nurse DD and finally get her to fall asleep when DS starts screaming that he has to go potty, which wakes her up.  I'm literally in tears I'm so exhausted.

I can't spend anytime trying to pat/shush her or put her down for any length of time because of DS.  I did EASY with DS, and while daytime sleep was always a challenge with him, it wasn't anything like this!!!  Can someone help me with where to start/focus?  I'm just so tired I can't even think straight.  Also, if the answer is she's still too young, or this is just a season in my life, I'm OK with that answer.  I think I just need someone to tell me that, LOL!

One note of positivity, she sleeps much better at night, and rarely wakes up more than once or twice!

Thanks again for all of your advice

Offline Lindsay27

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Re: How to start EASY with Older Sibling?!
« Reply #1 on: February 17, 2016, 01:43:14 am »
Oh honey believe me I could have written this myself!  And I think our LOs are a similar age so I completely get it so we can hold hands!

I think first things first, if your DD is like mine and only wants to be held to sleep, invest in a good carrier/wrap/sling.  Do you have one?  I still try for naps in her crib but when they fail I move to the wrap...then at least you can hopefully get on with your day a little bit.

What are your A times currently?  We are aiming for 1.15hrs right now and for the most part that is only yielding  us a 40min nap, but I think that is more a case of her not being able to transition between sleep cycles vs being UT.  When she wakes I only spend about 10mins trying to resettle and if she doesn't I just get her up and get on with the day.  With another LO you and I both know we can't spend hours trying to resettle naps.  This is where the wrap/sling is key :) 

As for your DS, mine doesn't nap anymore but has a quiet time which consists of watching a movie, or playing games on the iPad, or something similar.  I also have to do this right now when I'm attempting to get DD down for a nap.  I'm sad I have to resort to so much screen time, but the reality is I can't be 2 places at once.

Do you think any of the nursing is comfort feeding at all?  I know when my DD is tired she acts hungry.  Will she take a paci?



Offline FrankiesMom12

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Re: How to start EASY with Older Sibling?!
« Reply #2 on: February 17, 2016, 12:40:24 pm »
Lindsay27 - thank you, thank you, thank you for your response!  I was feeling so, so desperate yesterday and your post helped SO much.  I ended up needing to take my DS (3 year old) to urgent care last night and they felt he was starting with croup, so that made for a late night last night, and this is my first chance to respond.

I've been trying to do just about 1:15 A time as well.  I also think we're experiencing the same issue where it's not an issue of UT as she's one of those babies who has a few short cries just before she falls asleep and she almost always does it at about the 1:20 mark.

Can I ask you what type of sling/wrap you use.  I have a hotsling, which I like but DD doesn't seem to care for...I'm also slightly terrified I'm not putting her in it properly.  We also have a carrier that has buckles (it's a catbirdbaby).  I have slightly better luck with this, but my back starts to hurt a bit after a little while in it.  I'm totally willing to try anything at this point.

Don't even get me started on screen time!  When I say DS has been sick for awhile, I literally mean since the new year with fairly serious illnesses.  He's had pneumonia, croup (twice now), major ear infections, etc.  He didn't go to preschool for the entire month of January.  It's insanity...so he's had so much screen time it's ludicrous.

I do think some of the nursing is comfort nursing, I'm just not sure what to do about it.  She won't take a paci at all.  The good news is she's trying to suck her fingers and is making some progress at getting them to her mouth on her own.  My son didn't do much comfort sucking, so this is new for me.

Thank you again for your response!!!!