2 year old wakes screaming

[twinmama2]

My 2 year old (27 months) has never been a great sleeper, but we've had good stretches of him and his twin brother sleeping through the night.  For a few weeks now, his twin has been sleeping through almost every night, but he has slept through ONE night. 
He wakes up usually between 2am and 4am screaming his head off.  He is absolutely hysterical.  In the past we have always waited when they cry out to see if they will go back to sleep on their own, but he is just so upset it's hard to do that.  DH or I will go to him and have to lay on the floor next to his bed until he's asleep again.  Sometimes he wants to hold our hand or have us pat his back, but sometimes if we touch him it makes him even more hysterical.  On the worst nights he will end up coming to bed with us and will fall asleep quicker when he's in our bed.  We've tried having him sleep in a sleeping bag on our bedroom floor but that doesn't help, only if he's in our bed is he happy. 
However, even once he's in our bed he will often still wake once or twice.  He'll go from being fast asleep to screaming.  We can usually settle him quickly when he's in our bed though. 
Not sure what's causing these very upset nightwakings.  I've read a little bit about night terrors and I don't think that's it because he does wake up fully most of the time. 
Has anyone else had this or found ways to help with this?  I've read just about every sleep book and website I can get my hands on and am just out of ideas.

[creations]

Sorry you didn't get any replies yet, giving you a bump and hopefully someone will have some suggestions for you soon x

[jessmum46]

Couple of thoughts - does he have all his teeth yet? When my DD was getting her 2y molars she had insane separation anxiety-like symptoms and I couldn't leave her at all if she woke.  If he doesn't yet have all his teeth have you given pain meds a try? 

What's his typical daytime routine as in WU, nap and bedtime?  Agreed it doesn't sound like night terrors, typically those are early in the evening.  How does he normally go to sleep at night, as in is he normally able to fall asleep in bed alone without help? 

Hugs, must be rather exhausting - hopefully we can help

[twinmama2]

He just got his last molar in. Maybe that was part of the problem and we'll start seeing some changes (hoping).

He used to go to sleep on his own, but since his second birthday a few months ago he and his twin brother have insisted that DH or I sit in the room with them until they fall asleep. Not my preference, but DH says they're only little for so long and he doesn't mind sitting with them.

A typical day is:
Wake up around 6:00 or 6:30 (sometimes later if he had a rough night)
Nap 12:30-2:00 (he often wants to sleep longer but I wake them by 2:00 or else they'll never go to bed)
In bed by 7:45, usually asleep by 8:15

Thanks!

[jessmum46]

Looking at your routine I'd think overtiredness probably has a big part to play. He is having a super-short night (any less than 10.5-11h can build up OT very fast for many LOs) and I'd suggest some earlier bedtimes may improve things a lot. When was the last time you tried a longer nap or earlier night? You might be surprised!  With a nice long morning awake time he actually may be tired enough to settle earlier than you expect.  If he genuinely will not go down earlier at night then I would try either a bit earlier nap, capped at same length (to allow longer awake before bedtime) or a shorter nap - but both in combination with an earlier night.  For a 6/6.30 WU I would be aiming 7/7.30 (asleep for) at the latest.

What do you think?

[twinmama2]

We would love for them to go to bed earlier and have some time to ourselves in the evening again. We pushed bedtime later and later because it was taking so long for them to fall asleep that we thought they were under tired. We've had nights where one of us was sitting in their room for an hour or more waiting for them to fall asleep. But maybe if we try to adjust the nap a bit we may be able to get them to sleep earlier. How much awake time do kids this age typically need before bedtime?

[jessmum46]

 My daughter at that age was already starting to drop her nap, but when she did nap her day was roughly WU 6.30, nap 1/1.30 capped at 1.5h, BT 7/7.30pm.  So probably 6.5-7h awake in the morning then around 4.5h after the nap.

They are all different though so it may be a case of experimenting to see what works.  It's worth trying a bit earlier - problems settling can just as well be OT second wind as UT.  I've generally found with mine that OT at bedtime has led to problems settling and needing me/getting upset whereas with UT they've generally gone into bed and just chatted or rolled around, sometimes calling me but not at all upset if you know what I mean.

Honestly though it could still be UT - you are there and know them best if you think it is UT I'd try a shorter nap and see how you get on.  At least if it makes things worse you'll know to try the other way!  Whatever you try  stick to it for a week or so before making any more changes as it can take some time for them to adjust x