Author Topic: Still struggling with EW :(  (Read 3700 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline MayaandEvasmommy

  • BW Aficionado
  • ***
  • Showing Appreciation 0
  • Posts: 107
  • Location:
Still struggling with EW :(
« on: March 08, 2016, 06:33:24 am »
DD is 19 months and since last March has been waking at 5am or earlier :((((.  We tried allsorts and never seem to get more than 10 hours at night ,unless Ot then drops to 9.  We have been sticking consistently to one set nap at 12pm for a few months now with bedtime pushed out til 7.30pm.  Naps tend to be no longer than 1.5hrs. Earlier bedtimes don't work as we just get 4-4.30 wake ups, so I started to think she is just LSN.

On holiday at Christmas we managed to get longer naps which enabled us to go with a later Bt but still only got 10 hours at night. Then about 3 weeks ago over night she started sleeping until 6am :) :) :) :). We stuck with the same time re: naps and Bt and although we got 2 Ew towards the end of week she managed to reset herself and catch up, so for the majority I was 6am which I am so happy with.  Then it changed over night back again to 5am, she was still doing 1.5 nap although the last 2 days she has done 2hrs! So now I am at a loss what to do, not sure if she is just in an OT cycle and to let her nap longer, cap nap, bring BT forward or ?????? Please help I was enjoying my extra hour xxx

Offline cath~

  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 152
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 10058
  • Location: UK
Re: Still struggling with EW :(
« Reply #1 on: March 08, 2016, 14:12:41 pm »
Her sleep sounds similar to my DDs.

Maybe she was a bit ill or having a GS or was more active for a few weeks giving you those longer nights?  However, since the shorter nights seem to be the "norm" for her, my suggestion would be to try capping her nap for a few days and see if her nights lengthen.  Perhaps try capping at 1hr15 (or even 1hr) and see what happens.  You may have to stick with it for a few days to see a change.

If they don't change, then maybe try something else like W2S (although I've never been brave enough!) or a gro clock/lights on a timer.  Actually you could try the gro clock/lights on a timer in combination with capping her nap slightly, to see if it helps.

I've always found that a small reduction in my DDs' day sleep (by capping their nap) resulted in their nights lengthening by more that the amount I'd taken off their nap, so they got more sleep overall.

ETA LOTS of physical exercise also helps a lot.  Best nights ever (longest, and STTN) for DD2 have been after she's been outside doing a lot of walking the day before.
« Last Edit: March 08, 2016, 15:54:41 pm by cath~ »
DD1 - 8 years old
DD2 - 5 years old

Offline MayaandEvasmommy

  • BW Aficionado
  • ***
  • Showing Appreciation 0
  • Posts: 107
  • Location:
Re: Still struggling with EW :(
« Reply #2 on: March 11, 2016, 06:25:38 am »
Thanks.  Still not going great.  I wont totally rule out capping nap, however she never seemed to tag on to her night sleep.  On holiday she was sleeping 3-3.5 hours in day but still managed 10 hours at night and apart from these last few days she mostly naps for 1.5 but mostly 1hr 20.  I have bought bedtime earlier to 7pm and she is still sleeping til 5am so she is getting an extra 30 mins.  Last night was a disaster couldn't get her to bed until 7.45 and she was up at 4.30  :'(.

She does get lots o physical activity, she doesn't sit still lol, we also do a music and activity class on a Thursday morning where she literally dances for an hour, ironically the morning after is always an early morning.  Yesterday she was lying around all morning and think she would have dropped a morning nap in too if I had let her.  I think she will always be an early to bed early to riser :(.  FX the clock change at the end of month might shift something.  Boy I would love just to make 6am x

Offline cath~

  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 152
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 10058
  • Location: UK
Re: Still struggling with EW :(
« Reply #3 on: March 11, 2016, 13:20:56 pm »
((hugs))

Last night was a disaster couldn't get her to bed until 7.45 and she was up at 4.30  :'(.
sounds like could be OT then...  Or DYT teeth could be affecting things?

Some LOs just do prefer shorter nights and longer naps..  If WU is too early then yeah the clock change should help things, but you'd have later BT too, of course - would that be OK for you?  If so, then you might just have to go for a routine "shift" like that.  I.e. accept 10hr nights and do something like 8pm-6am (so what you're getting now, before the clock change).  Then you can always do EBT quite easily on days when she's tired.

There's a big development leap too around 18-19 months which can make sleep go a bit wonky and they can seem to want/need less for a while.  Just too much on their minds to stay asleep!

WDYT about trying a gro clock/lights on a timer?  It worked really well for my DD1 when we started at 19 mos.
Gro-Clock / Lights on a timer: What, Why, When and How
DD1 - 8 years old
DD2 - 5 years old

Offline MayaandEvasmommy

  • BW Aficionado
  • ***
  • Showing Appreciation 0
  • Posts: 107
  • Location:
Re: Still struggling with EW :(
« Reply #4 on: March 21, 2016, 13:32:40 pm »
Totally gone wonky over here  :'( :'( :'( :'(.  We are now getting 1hr 20 mins nap and barely 9 hours at night.  I have temporarily bought BT earlier by 30 mins to see if it helps but she is waking between 3 and 4 and wont go back off :(.  I think we may have hit the 18 month regression.  How do you deal with night wakings? she lies back down but wants me to have contact, hand holding, hand on back etc not sure how to tackle without causing more disruption in the long run x

Offline MayaandEvasmommy

  • BW Aficionado
  • ***
  • Showing Appreciation 0
  • Posts: 107
  • Location:
Re: Still struggling with EW :(
« Reply #5 on: March 23, 2016, 07:41:52 am »
Help!!!! 1 hour naps and 8 hours sleep  :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(, 4am wake ups.  How do I fix this? #feelingdesperate

Offline MasynSpencerElliotte

  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 249
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 16048
  • Location: Canada
Re: Still struggling with EW :(
« Reply #6 on: March 23, 2016, 20:31:34 pm »
(((Hugs)))...just at work but I will pop on tonight with ideas xx
Heidi




Offline Haribo2012

  • Toddler Sleep
  • Moderator
  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 75
  • Posts: 4924
  • Location: England
Re: Still struggling with EW :(
« Reply #7 on: March 23, 2016, 20:40:44 pm »
Hugs it does sound a bit developmental and OT. We had a phase of this and really ended up just riding it out.
What time are you offering the nap?
Zoe


Offline ~Jen~

  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 1
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 816
  • Location: A New Yorker living in London
Re: Still struggling with EW :(
« Reply #8 on: March 23, 2016, 20:55:23 pm »
Lots of hugs...  this sounds VERY similar to my DD.  We are going through the same thing at the moment - in fact I could have written the same exact post as you.  She is always up by 5/5:30am and we've had our fair share of 4:30am as well.  We've set naps at 12 and BT at 7 for a couple of weeks but it hasn't helped very much so far. I've thought about capping nap but now I'm not so sure. She gave us better nights over Christmas as well and then it was back to the same when we came home. I'm exhausted actually our entire house is exhausted because she wakes everyone up. Do you go to her right away? I leave to leave her most mornings until 6am.  Hang in there - I keep telling myself it can't go on forever!!



Offline MasynSpencerElliotte

  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 249
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 16048
  • Location: Canada
Re: Still struggling with EW :(
« Reply #9 on: March 24, 2016, 04:08:29 am »
Hugs it does sound a bit developmental and OT. We had a phase of this and really ended up just riding it out.
What time are you offering the nap?

I agree...prime time for the 18 month sleep regression and also around half birthdays there can be development leaps. Personally during these times I did go back to a bit of apop while we rode it out and it never became an entrenched habit, just some gradual withdrawal mixed with wi/wo to get back on track afterwards.
Heidi




Offline MayaandEvasmommy

  • BW Aficionado
  • ***
  • Showing Appreciation 0
  • Posts: 107
  • Location:
Re: Still struggling with EW :(
« Reply #10 on: March 24, 2016, 09:13:58 am »
Thanks everyone, nice to know im not alone :).  Yesterday we had a lovely 2 hour nap and I decided on a much earlier Bt as I do believe she is chronically OT.  BT was at 6.30 and she slept til 4.30, and I cant believe I was actually happy it was 4.30 as at least it was 10 hours! What has happened to me lol.  Anyway I still am I firm believer that she can only do 10 hours, so its knowing how to get to an 8pm BT without OT setting in.  Our clocks go forward on Saturday night, and as it is half term I think I am going to bite the bullet and roll with a much later BT even though I know we will get in a mess but hubby is off so at least I wont be on my own tackling it, then hopefully I can reset her body clock after a while? Who knows?  ???

Thoughts always welcome xx

Offline Haribo2012

  • Toddler Sleep
  • Moderator
  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 75
  • Posts: 4924
  • Location: England
Re: Still struggling with EW :(
« Reply #11 on: March 24, 2016, 11:18:26 am »
You could always pop a little cat nap in of 20 mins around 4pm if your doing 8pm BT x
Zoe


Offline MayaandEvasmommy

  • BW Aficionado
  • ***
  • Showing Appreciation 0
  • Posts: 107
  • Location:
Re: Still struggling with EW :(
« Reply #12 on: March 25, 2016, 07:01:23 am »
Well another disaster :(.. Nap of 1 hour 15 mins, BT 7pm and wake at 4.30! She did stir at 2.30am but went straight back off but at 4.30 she is up and awake for the day.  Surely even if she was LSN, this is still low?

Offline ~Jen~

  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 1
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 816
  • Location: A New Yorker living in London
Re: Still struggling with EW :(
« Reply #13 on: March 25, 2016, 13:06:37 pm »
Something that helped us the other day was when DD did a 10mins little cat nap in the buggy around 10:45am. She was a bit groggy when I woke her but not terrible.  Then I put her down just 15mins after her ususal 12 naptime and she went back down without a problem. IT seemed to take the edge off she slept well for a good 2hrs.  Then I still put her down for usual BT just slightly later at 7:10.  She slept till almost 6! That is the latest we've had in months.  Maybe could help to catch her up a bit? 



Offline MayaandEvasmommy

  • BW Aficionado
  • ***
  • Showing Appreciation 0
  • Posts: 107
  • Location:
Re: Still struggling with EW :(
« Reply #14 on: March 26, 2016, 10:08:53 am »
 She woke yesterday as normal at 4.10!!!!!

Now I am to going to rant a little! Since forever hubby and I have disagreed on lo sleep needs.  He thinks if she has no nap, goes to bed late she will sleep in. I don't disagree things need to change but the idea of keeping her up late :(, I need a bit of downtime before I go to bed. Well yesterday she woke at 4.10 had a 2.5 hour nap ( mil was in charge yesterday, me and my eldest had a girly day).  Anyway dad was then in charge on the evening and put her down at 9pm.  We always take it in turns on a weekend to have a lie in, he offered to do this morning and she slept until 6.30!!!!! I know it could be a fluke but I HATE HIM BEING RIGHT!!!!! Still only 9.5 hours though.



Offline Haribo2012

  • Toddler Sleep
  • Moderator
  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 75
  • Posts: 4924
  • Location: England
Re: Still struggling with EW :(
« Reply #15 on: March 26, 2016, 15:30:05 pm »
He might not be right she might have just crashed from short nights x
Zoe


Offline MasynSpencerElliotte

  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 249
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 16048
  • Location: Canada
Re: Still struggling with EW :(
« Reply #16 on: March 26, 2016, 17:11:37 pm »
^^^true...or she is lower sleep needs. My DD3 would never have done a 2.5hr nap at that age and had a decent bedtime (I think we were down to a 45 min nap &  an 8 pm bedtime by that age in comparison - she is very low for sleep though).  But when we did no nap she for sure did not need a later bedtime!
Heidi




Offline MayaandEvasmommy

  • BW Aficionado
  • ***
  • Showing Appreciation 0
  • Posts: 107
  • Location:
Re: Still struggling with EW :(
« Reply #17 on: March 26, 2016, 17:29:03 pm »
I know it may have been due to catch up, but just the fact she slept in this morning P****d me off when he said she would if she went to bed later lol.

Anyway, she would have gone to sleep earlier if he had put her down, he just wanted to prove a point and put her down later.  Our clocks go forward tonight so I am going to bite the bullet and put her down later again and see over a few days if we can reset her body clock somehow.  I do think she will only ever be a 10 hour  nighter but its just getting the balance right as she is sensitive to Ot so if I mess it up she drops down to 9 hours but an earlier night still results in the same wake up but we get 10 hours!

Offline MayaandEvasmommy

  • BW Aficionado
  • ***
  • Showing Appreciation 0
  • Posts: 107
  • Location:
Re: Still struggling with EW :(
« Reply #18 on: March 27, 2016, 07:10:14 am »
She only had 1hr 30 yesterday and was pretty tired by 6ish, but I dragged her out til 8.30pm and she slept until 5am! (not with hour added on), so no difference, so must have been a fluke yesterday, but only got 8.5 hours :(.  Anyway still going to roll with it and see how we get on

Offline MayaandEvasmommy

  • BW Aficionado
  • ***
  • Showing Appreciation 0
  • Posts: 107
  • Location:
Re: Still struggling with EW :(
« Reply #19 on: March 28, 2016, 08:39:53 am »
Another disaster, wake up at 5am, refused nap so nap didn't happen until 2pm, she slept for 2 hours, refused Bt and finally went to sleep at 9.30pm. Wake up at 5am! (which would be 4am to her body clock), only 7.5 hours!!! when is this going to change  :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(

Offline Haribo2012

  • Toddler Sleep
  • Moderator
  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 75
  • Posts: 4924
  • Location: England
Re: Still struggling with EW :(
« Reply #20 on: March 28, 2016, 13:38:24 pm »
I always found DS1 took a couple of days after clock change to kind of reset, you might find she adjusts after a day or 2 X
Zoe


Offline MayaandEvasmommy

  • BW Aficionado
  • ***
  • Showing Appreciation 0
  • Posts: 107
  • Location:
Re: Still struggling with EW :(
« Reply #21 on: March 29, 2016, 08:12:09 am »
Well we are now on day 4 ???..We got a 2 hour nap yesterday and I put her down at 8.30pm as she was really grumpy and tired all day.  She woke at 2.45, screaming, I ended up bringing her in with me as she normally takes 2 hours to go back off and I just didn't hav it in me to stay up and her wake the whole house up either  :'(, she probably took and hour to go back off and she slept until 6.44! so at least we all had a good rest x

Offline MayaandEvasmommy

  • BW Aficionado
  • ***
  • Showing Appreciation 0
  • Posts: 107
  • Location:
Re: Still struggling with EW :(
« Reply #22 on: March 30, 2016, 11:39:58 am »
Still struggling :'(.  Wouldn't go to bed last night, up screaming, she then threw herself out her cot :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(. Finally got her to sleep at 9.30, she woke again at 4am!!!! screaming.  My asthma was playing me up last night so hubby took her into bed with him again and she went straight back off til 7pm! Looks like we have another habit to break.  She has always been such a great independent sleeper now she wants us to put or hand on her till she falls back to sleep :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(

Offline Haribo2012

  • Toddler Sleep
  • Moderator
  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 75
  • Posts: 4924
  • Location: England
Re: Still struggling with EW :(
« Reply #23 on: March 30, 2016, 17:29:51 pm »
Sounds like a bit of separation anxiety in the mix too which often happens with developmental stuff.

I'd prob just put the hand on her for a night and see if she settles as you will get IS back again x
Zoe


Offline MayaandEvasmommy

  • BW Aficionado
  • ***
  • Showing Appreciation 0
  • Posts: 107
  • Location:
Re: Still struggling with EW :(
« Reply #24 on: March 31, 2016, 05:54:30 am »
Yay!!!! got a lie in until 6.15 :), although I couldn't blinking sleep!

Anyway what we did different.

Nap 1hour as we were going out as I am sick of staying in and sleep governing my day.

2 mile walk :), guess it will keep me fit too :).

Cat nap on way back 15-20 mins around 4.50pm.

BT 7.30pm settled much better, she stirred around 3am but settled back off, also woke at 5am for a drink but went back off.

I also reverted back to sleeping bag along with light duvet incase she was waking cold.

Could have been a complete fluke from so many late nights caught up with her! We are going away next week so might do us good to have a curve ball on routine xx

Offline ~Jen~

  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 1
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 816
  • Location: A New Yorker living in London
Re: Still struggling with EW :(
« Reply #25 on: March 31, 2016, 08:55:30 am »
Yay!   :D   That's great.  When they're this "off" their routine and exhausted a little CN can help the OT and 15-20mins isn't going to do much harm once in a while.   Have a great day!



Offline MayaandEvasmommy

  • BW Aficionado
  • ***
  • Showing Appreciation 0
  • Posts: 107
  • Location:
Re: Still struggling with EW :(
« Reply #26 on: April 02, 2016, 18:42:25 pm »
Update! So after the later wake up we headed out at 10.15 and she fell asleep in car, probably had 30 mins.  We had another full filled day with lots of walking and she napped in car on way to food so probably 15 mins, BT at 8.45pm (although we headed home at around 7pm she didn't fall asleep until we were home), WU 5.30am. 

Following day nap at 12pm she woke herself coughing after 1 hour :(, Bt @ 7.15, slept until 6.15  ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D.  Not sure if the shorter naps are helping, she has a little cold or teeth have now popped through? but I will take it for now :). She has however refused all naps today :(.  My lie in tomorrow so im not really bothered lol xxxx

Offline Haribo2012

  • Toddler Sleep
  • Moderator
  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 75
  • Posts: 4924
  • Location: England
Re: Still struggling with EW :(
« Reply #27 on: April 02, 2016, 18:52:08 pm »
Yahey for some good sleep! Hope you get a good night and enjoy your lay in xx
Zoe


Offline MayaandEvasmommy

  • BW Aficionado
  • ***
  • Showing Appreciation 0
  • Posts: 107
  • Location:
Re: Still struggling with EW :(
« Reply #28 on: April 10, 2016, 20:09:29 pm »
Well we have had a lovely few days away :).  Sleep all over the place, she still woke up at 5ish, got one morning of 6.30  ;D, naps seem to be very erratic.  As we were away she fell asleep mainly in the car, averaging around 1hour in total.  Been back a couple of days and she is ready for a nap at around 10am, but will refuse another nap so early Bt are back. The eldest dd is back at school tomorrow so we can get back into some form of routine, not sure what we should be aiming for  ???

Offline Haribo2012

  • Toddler Sleep
  • Moderator
  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 75
  • Posts: 4924
  • Location: England
Re: Still struggling with EW :(
« Reply #29 on: April 17, 2016, 06:03:51 am »
How have things been?
Zoe


Offline MayaandEvasmommy

  • BW Aficionado
  • ***
  • Showing Appreciation 0
  • Posts: 107
  • Location:
Re: Still struggling with EW :(
« Reply #30 on: April 18, 2016, 12:52:54 pm »
Hi, things are about the same  :'(.  We get a couple of days of NW, and super early mornings and nap refusal then have 1 good nap day with a later lie in.  I have found she will go down easy for a nap for her nan on the days I work but wont for me she kicks up a fuss and wants cuddles to sleep, which is fine by me but not sure what the story is with her atm.  OT definitely causes greater SA as she wants me to hold her hand to sleep also.  I don't want to begrudge her extra cuddles and attention if she needs it, however I don't want it to be a slippery slope into being a prisoner by her side, which is the mistake we made with our eldest :(.  Not sure how to play it tbh.

Rachael

Offline MasynSpencerElliotte

  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 249
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 16048
  • Location: Canada
Re: Still struggling with EW :(
« Reply #31 on: April 19, 2016, 14:34:06 pm »
Yes it is a slippery slope! What about cuddles before going into bed and then sit but don't hold her hand (have totally fallen into that with DD3 it is a hard one to break!).
Heidi




Offline Anika920

  • New, But Posting Steadily!
  • **
  • Showing Appreciation 0
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 81
  • FTM to a precious baby boy SAHM
  • Location: Atlanta/Smyrna, GA
Re: Still struggling with EW :(
« Reply #32 on: April 28, 2016, 00:59:26 am »
Oh my goodness momma this all sounds like the mess that's going on over here at my house. Though thankfully not waking that early. My game plan is basically to try and stick to by the clock. We're switching to 1 nap and nap and BT will be at the same time from here on out with maybe 30m earlier BT if needed. That's the only thing I can think of is my LO is super sensitive to schedule. I'm definitely no sleep expert but wanted to comment and follow yours as well since we are having erratic days and just when I think we're getting on track I mess it up by changing things around, or who knows. But I'll feel like at least if I'm consistent maybe LO will be also?! Good luck to us both.