How is this still happening at 11 months??!

[eogan0622]

Hi All,

11 months in and of course, I know, that things change all the time and nothing stays the same for long....but I thought FOR SURE my 11 month old DD would be STTN at this point! I feel like I have tried EVERYTHING and have worked so hard to be consistent and instill good habits from the beginning, and still...argh!!!!

Here's the current situation.  My 11 month old DD is waking up 1-2x a night.  There is literally nothing predictable about these wake ups.  Some days she has great naps and wakes up 2x.  Some days she has not great naps and wakes up 2x.  Some days she has great naps and wakes up 1x.  You get the picture. 

A little background:  A month ago, she was STTN for about 2 weeks.  It was glorious.  Prior to that, she had been getting up 1x around 4-5 to eat and back to sleep.  She has always been easy to get back down, esp after feeding.  We put her to sleep drowsy but awake.  She is crawling and standing and cruising and moving a lot, not walking yet.  About 3 weeks ago, she got a bad cold which kept her up a lot during the night because she couldn't breathe laying down.  She would be up for up to 1.5 hours at a time unable to sleep and breathe (she sometimes takes a paci to fall asleep, and couldn't breathe with it in).  After a week of a cold, she started teething and was up, again, for up to 1.5 hours at a time.  This was super unusual for us, since she has always been so easy to put down and re settle.  The teething mayhem lasted another week, she now has 2 front teeth (her first).  During these 2 weeks, we did anything we could to settle her.  While she was sick, we often would have to let her fall asleep on us upright before putting her in the crib.  Teething, often I would nurse her to soothe her.  I was so scared that these habits would stick but she was able to self soothe and settle on her own again soon enough.  However, now that the teeth have poked through and the cold is gone...WHY IS SHE STILL WAKING UP SO MUCH?  I try to send DH in to soothe her and she is HYSTERICAL to the point where I have to go in after 10-15 mins and all she wants is to nurse...it's literally the only way to settle her.  And she eats!  I mean she's nursing 7-15 minutes which I feel like is pretty significant (she's always been a very efficient nurser- 4-5 mins/feed).  So...what's going on?  I can't believe that I am nursing her 1-2x a night at 11 months!!! When she was sleeping through! What do we do?  We're exhausted...

The only aspect I can't complain about, and it's a big one, is that her days are great.  She's SO happy and so easy during the day, and has been napping really well. She's also been eating solids pretty well too.  She's petite for her age (1st % for height and weight), but she eats 3 solid meals and 2 snacks a day. She is BF.

Here's a sample of our EASY:
Sunday:
7:10: WU for day
8:00: Breakfast Solids
9:20: E
9:45-11:15: S
12:00: Lunch Solids
1:40: E
3:00-4:15: S
4:40: E (2 mins)
5:30: Dinner solids
7:20: E (6 oz bottle)
7:35: S
NW: 3:00 A

Monday:
6:00: WU for day
7:00: E
7:30: breakfast solids
9:00-10:10: S
10:30: E
12:00: lunch solids
1:40: E
2:00-3:40: S
3:45: E (less than 2 mins)
5:30: dinner solids
6:50: E (give a bottle, ate 6 oz)
7:00: S
NW: 1145, 12:30, 5:10

How do we nip this in the bud?  I need her to be STTN it's crazy!!! How do we approach these NW?  She is really sobbing and standing in her crib almost inconsolable. 

[zissi]

no advice just following as we are in similar situation

[Katet]

You probably don't want to hear this, but I do think that some children just don't do what the books say & STTN. I don't know if it was me doing things wrong or the whole host of other things that were going on (teeth, asthma, milk allergy (to dairy in my milk) or in DS2 LSN) but neither of mine really consistently slept through (even without feeds) until they dropped their Naps, I don't know if it was what I did or them, but it was funny how many other people I since discovered were the same, just didn't talk about it.

The fact she gets upset for 10mins would make her thirsty, so wondering if when your DH goes in he could offer a drink as maybe thirst rather than hunger is an issue too.

[lily_layne]

I didn't have time to read everything closely but I wanted to pop on with some reassurance. Yes, there are many LOs who aren't STTN at 11 months. My DS was one of them. He did a stint for a month around 12 months when he STTN 6 out of 7 nights and then he woke again. He just started STTN again (at 15 months) and I didn't do any sleep training - he just did it on his own. The fact that she did STTN shows that she can and she will do it again.

I will try to pop on tomorrow and see if any routine changes might help.

[Lindsay27]

I kind of echo the other ladies, even with a great routine my DS didn't start sleeping through until he was about 13 months.

Just looking quickly, I think you could be encroaching on 2-1 nap territory.  I think the first A time in the morning is probably on the low side (even though you are getting a decent nap), but if you extend that A your day is either going to get long day, or the last nap is going to be more of a CN. 

[eogan0622]

Good to know I'm not alone!  I'm sure that we are heading toward 2-1 transition, however I can't see exactly how that correlates to NW for eating?  If she was up for awhile at night just awake, then I would understand it.  But she eats, and goes right down!  I'm wondering if it's just a phase or if she might be hitting a growth spurt. 

I've tried lots of combinations of A times, and have found that she definitely does best with a shorter A time between waking and 1st nap.  Between 2.45 and 3 hrs is really ideal for her, and you're right- extending that much longer puts us into a weird territory for 2nd nap- and thus the 2-1 transition!  I'm going to hold on to her good naps for awhile until those start to shift.  If anyone has advice for NW let me know!

[lily_layne]

With my DS, I kind of just accepted the NWs and I found that made it easier to handle them. Around 9 months, I was thinking of doing some sleep training at night (instead of just nursing him when he woke) but then we were at our cabin for 2 months and he was in our room and I just found it easier to keep feeding him (and I Just kept on doing that). I rarely ever tried anything else but feeding him when he woke and like I said, he just eventually started STTN on his own.

My DS also liked a shorter first A time (2.5-3h, just like your LO) and that stayed the same until he went to one nap. I did end up having to cap the first nap around 10/11 months because he was really getting silly about the pm nap and I didn't want to push it too late because I wanted him napping when DD napped.

[eogan0622]

Thank you.  It seriously makes me feel so much better to know that I haven't messed something up and that others are going through the same thing or have been through it too. 

At first, I felt like "Ugh! I need to do something different and start sleep training again!"  But then, after a little while, I felt like "Maybe this is just a phase..and she'll stop when she doesn't need it..."  So that's where I'm at.


Agreed re: capping first nap.  I don't let it go past 11:15am no matter when she starts it- whether it be 930 or 10...that way I can fit in another nap later in the day.

Thanks for the support!

[lily_layne]

I felt like "Maybe this is just a phase..and she'll stop when she doesn't need it..."  So that's where I'm at.

That's how I felt with DS.

I don't let it go past 11:15am no matter when she starts it- whether it be 930 or 10...that way I can fit in another nap later in the day.

That's also exactly what I did with DS.