Author Topic: 6mo new to EASY  (Read 5759 times)

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Offline Batool huzaifa

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6mo new to EASY
« on: March 22, 2016, 05:00:46 am »
Hi i have a 6 months old with whom i tried pu pd wch worked realy great for thw first  2 3 days but now on the 6th day there has been no progress since 3 days..sometimes he goes to sleep in 20 mins other times in 40 mins.i applied easy today but he slept fr just 35 mins in his morning nap..i tried pu pd for another 40 mins to put him to sleep again but he did not go to sleep however he was constantly rubbing his eyes..now should i make him sleep the moment he shows sleep cues or make him sleep at the scheduled easy afternoon naptime..if i dont put him to sleep bfre hos afternon nap time he ll be too tired by that time..please help..realy tired..

Offline becj86

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Re: 6mo new to EASY
« Reply #1 on: March 24, 2016, 10:06:32 am »
Hi, welcome to BW, I've split your post off into a new thread so you're getting some fresh eyes :)

Can you write out what your day looks like, EAS style, so as an example:
7am - wake, eat (breastfed/formula)
9:30 - nap
11 - wake, eat
etc. Please include night wakings and if/when you fed, eg:
7pm - asleep in bed for the night
NW: 11 - fed; 4 - fed

Any background on your baby would also be helpful - any medical issues, have you started solids, how is baby fed, any changes recently?

Offline Batool huzaifa

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Re: 6mo new to EASY
« Reply #2 on: March 25, 2016, 16:08:01 pm »
Hi..thnks for the reply...yeah this is his routine since last thursday..bfre tht he had no routine as such n was awake every 1 2 hours at night n just napping for 30 mins a couple of times in day...
8 a.m wake up..it varies from.7 to 8:30
8:05 bf
9:30 breakfast
10:30 naptime ...varies from 10 to 11 depending on wake up time( inly napping for 40 mins..but found some success usinh tracy s wake to sleep method)
12:30 bf
1:15 bath
2:30 naptime...sleeps for 2 hours
5: 00 bf
7:00 dinner
7:40 bf
7:50 bedtime routine
Sleeps around 8:15..
Dreamfeeding at 11:00

Wakes up atleast twice a night n does not settle without bf..but after bf i keep him drowsy in his bed n he plays for half an hour to one hour then sleeps on his own..

Offline becj86

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Re: 6mo new to EASY
« Reply #3 on: March 25, 2016, 21:30:24 pm »
Are the wakings & feedings at night happening at any particular times? That's what helps work out what to do with the day routine.

It looks like you've made some good progress, there is usually a regression around day 3-5 that goes for a few days, so that's probably what you've noticed there.

I suspect from what you've said that the first A time could be a little longer and you might get a better nap. I'd aim for 3hr minimum based on what you've said in your posts so far. You could also try a wind down - he sleeps better after a bath, I notice.

Offline Batool huzaifa

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Re: 6mo new to EASY
« Reply #4 on: March 26, 2016, 00:40:46 am »
Yeah around 2 a.m and then around 6 a.m he wakes up for night feeds..but yesterday night he also woke up around 10:30 p.m..n ystrday he dint even open his eyes...cried n then i nursed him n he slept back right there n then...i tried increing A time to 3 hours in morning but dint work.. yeah he sleeps better after bath..what winding down activity do u suggest bfre his morning nap?

Offline becj86

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Re: 6mo new to EASY
« Reply #5 on: March 26, 2016, 21:17:10 pm »
NW's are probably not something you can do much about - they're within normal for his age and they're well spaced.

WRT wind down, you could try a little massage or a quiet walk around outside chatting about whatever you wish to chat about, something with some firm physical contact with you will probably help him to relax ready for sleep.

Offline Batool huzaifa

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Re: 6mo new to EASY
« Reply #6 on: March 27, 2016, 10:41:02 am »
Yesterday we had to go out for some work..he did not sleep the whole day..just for 20 mins in his stroller...i was amazed coz i had thought once he kearns to self soothe he ll sleep wherever he is on his scheduled nap times...but he did not sleep...dows this mean i can not go anywhr on his nap times?? He also wake up 6 times yestrday noght...as if all his schedule had been done upside down:((

Offline becj86

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Re: 6mo new to EASY
« Reply #7 on: March 28, 2016, 02:41:40 am »
20min nap is pretty classis for overstimulation - with a spirited baby, you can go out, but in my experience, about 30min before nap time has to be quiet relaxing activity with someone with whom he is comfortable (mum or dad, usually) so he can sleep. My DS would wake any time he heard a noise he wasn't familiar with, so I had to take him and show him the source of each sound and how the sound was produced/source of the noise was controlled, then he'd sleep fine through that noise thereafter.

Waking up lots in the night after 20min day sleep would likely be from being overtired.

Do you have a carrier/sling/wrap type thing you could use to help him calm down before/for a nap when you're out? I think once you find a wind down that works at home, you should be able to use it or something similar when you're out but it will be different sleeping out and about than at home.

Offline Batool huzaifa

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Re: 6mo new to EASY
« Reply #8 on: March 30, 2016, 00:11:03 am »
But sounds in a mall are all so diffrent..how can i show the source...besides ibdont knw wat is going wrong...he has strted waking up more frequently at the noght n is not gng to sleep on his own...he needs breastfeeding...n even in the naps n at night he is fussing a lot bfre gnh to sleep..it seems everything is becoming the way it was..n all my hardwork is going in vane..plz help wat went wrong?? Just tht one day we took him out?? Its been almost 2 weeks trying pupd n easy...now hell tired...

Offline becj86

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Re: 6mo new to EASY
« Reply #9 on: March 30, 2016, 08:47:44 am »
What have your last two days looked like? Can you write out the EAS for me?

I was just giving an example of how I found I had to see what was upsetting my baby and what helped him. Your baby is probably different from mine, you know him far better than I do, so this is the key of BW: tuning in to what baby is telling you and helping him learn, in this case, to sleep.

Keep in mind there's a big developmental leap at 6 months too, so that can play havoc with sleep even when you're not just setting up a routine. http://www.thewonderweeks.com/the-mental-leaps-and-wonder-weeks/  http://www.thewonderweeks.com/mental-leap-5/
This is actually a big one wrt sleep too!

Offline Batool huzaifa

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Re: 6mo new to EASY
« Reply #10 on: March 31, 2016, 02:45:57 am »
Well since the lastv2 days he has not been taking his usual 2 hours nap after his bath..just 45 mins nap...and in the morning also just 45 mins..then i do pupd which is sometimes successful n sometimes not..in the night he has been waking up 2 3 times and i bf him n sometimea he goes to sleep on my breast rest he plays for sometime n then sleep on his own..yestrday was a dfrent day coz we had to go out n obvsly he wouldnt sleep outside..so he slept at 11 p.m instead of his usual 8:15 p.m..but he woke up at 8:30 a.m his feedings n activitty times are all same as bfre...but his sleep patterns are changing..yestrday he also had a catnap at 6:15p.m..i m afraid that his night wakings are a problem..coz wen he wakes up he wants to bf..n may be m bf him too much at the night...since most ppl say their babies sleep thru the night then y does my baby needs 2 3 times bf in the night?

Offline Batool huzaifa

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Re: 6mo new to EASY
« Reply #11 on: March 31, 2016, 03:42:35 am »
Also y is he taking so long to get sleep trained??.. he was dng fine now he is not..tracy had said in her book tht in hercwrst case a baby took 2 weeks to get sleep trained..i already gave him 2 weeks excpet a day on wchich we had to go out.. how long will it take..

Offline Batool huzaifa

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Re: 6mo new to EASY
« Reply #12 on: March 31, 2016, 09:01:00 am »
Today he took a good 1 hour to go to sleep after his bath...which is aweful...in the past it usualy took 5 to 10 mins to make him sleep...dont know wats gng wrong:(

Offline becj86

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Re: 6mo new to EASY
« Reply #13 on: March 31, 2016, 09:16:08 am »
Those 45min naps in place of long ones, could well be that he needs more A time - try 3:15 as a starting point.

All these inconsistencies - they are probably part of why he's taking longer to sleep train than you expected. I think also your expectations might be a little unrealistic - he's not a robot. At this point in his life, he's going through a mental leap, a growth spurt, you teaching him to sleep independently and setting up a routine when he's not previously had one. That's a lot of new information and experiences to assimilate into his life. He's not read the book - he cannot reason through the changes that are happening in his life and put them into perspective.

Its actually normal for babies of 6 months to still have 2-3 night feeds.

Offline Batool huzaifa

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Re: 6mo new to EASY
« Reply #14 on: April 01, 2016, 03:11:04 am »
I think u r right...ine thing thats troubling me the most is tht i cant go nywhr wid him...coz he doesnt sleep anywhr even if he has a scheduled nap..he becomes overatimukated very easily.. i have a question..if i bf him wen he wakes up at night n he goes to sleep on my breast will that make him forget to self soothe n go back to sleep on his own?? N can this be the reason for taking so long to sleep train him??

Offline becj86

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Re: 6mo new to EASY
« Reply #15 on: April 01, 2016, 07:01:13 am »
What have you tried in relation to sleeping out and about?

I think if you're going to go out with him for a day, you just expect sleep to be wonky, you do your best to give him the opportunity to sleep (maybe your APOP those naps by wheeling him in a pram or cuddling him in a carrier/wrap) and you know the next day or two will be rough while you get back on track. Once his body is used to sleeping at given A times from a stable routine, that may get a bit easier but yes, babies do cramp one's style somewhat.

if i bf him wen he wakes up at night n he goes to sleep on my breast will that make him forget to self soothe n go back to sleep on his own??
Not necessarily - I think provided he's sleeping reasonable stretches in between and not dependent upon the breast to get to sleep, its probably fine. I know for me, DS would be asleep pretty close to the end of the feed though he'd usually wake when I burped him which was a must due to my overactive letdown. Baby being drowsy at night is to be expected and ideal IMHO, a quick feed and back into bed asap means more sleep for everyone. If he is going to sleep independently for naps/bedtime, I think that's fine. I'm more concerned that his short naps are caused by A times being too short than by baby not self-soothing.

Two weeks, honestly, is not a long time to be sleep training. You are seeing improvement. Things get in the way of sleep training, teeth, growth spurts, developmental leaps, illness, etc. All these things can set back progress with sleep, be it routine, independence in falling asleep, etc. and sleep training once doesn't mean you won't need to go back to the methods later to help LO through at times. You're teaching your baby everything - you don't teach a baby to read by giving him a classical novel, you show him letters and words and pictures and stories and over several years, he builds up associations and eventually can put letters together to make words. Learning to relax to sleep is much the same, though hopefully doesn't take as long ;) Its not an overnight process.

Offline Batool huzaifa

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Re: 6mo new to EASY
« Reply #16 on: April 02, 2016, 02:31:06 am »
Hi. Thanks so much for the support..things are coming on track thankfully.. yesterday was much better:) yes i have tried the pran as well as carrier but again he would wake up after 20 30 mins wen outside..wats apop??

Offline Batool huzaifa

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Re: 6mo new to EASY
« Reply #17 on: April 02, 2016, 02:32:47 am »
He went down to sleep much easilu though still woke up very early but was still better...thanks bec:)))...i ll keep updated watevwr happens next

Offline becj86

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Re: 6mo new to EASY
« Reply #18 on: April 02, 2016, 03:34:19 am »
APOP = Accidental parenting on purpose - using a prop to achieve the sleep LO needs knowing you'll have to train out of it or wait for the nap to drop, basically.

DS would only sleep in a wrap/carrier with the hood on (would only tolerate it once asleep).

Glad he's falling off to sleep more easily, its nice when that's not such a battle :)

Offline Batool huzaifa

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Re: 6mo new to EASY
« Reply #19 on: April 05, 2016, 03:43:17 am »
Yeah again we had to go out..i managed him to go to sleep by rocking but again he woke up in 20 mins..though iwas carrying him in my arms..thts the only issue rt now..rest seems fine..obvsly he is cranky the other day but thts understandable since he is overtired..

Offline becj86

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Re: 6mo new to EASY
« Reply #20 on: April 05, 2016, 09:57:21 am »
Yes, those 20min naps are overstimulation, pretty hard to avoid when you're out and about. Glad things are otherwise good :)

Offline Batool huzaifa

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Re: 6mo new to EASY
« Reply #21 on: April 11, 2016, 07:42:37 am »
Hi..i wanted to ask its okay to bring my lo shedule 1 hour later...tht is 9p.m bedtime...that wont affect his habits right?

Offline becj86

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Re: 6mo new to EASY
« Reply #22 on: April 11, 2016, 19:24:14 pm »
It depends on the child - Some will do fine, some will really struggle as it just doesn't fit with their body clock. Most babies do best with 7-7 routine which is why Tracy suggests that. I have seen some babies do absolutely fine with a 9pm BT though, provided they're not getting up before 8am.

Offline Batool huzaifa

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Re: 6mo new to EASY
« Reply #23 on: April 12, 2016, 00:34:25 am »
Since a last few days his routine is completely off schedule.. n thts bcoz he wakes up at different times..sometimes 7 n sometimes 8:30.. how dobi stick to his routine..its becoming unpredictable..his A Times have also become shorter for some reason..night sleep has never been more than 10.5 hours..with sometimes just being 10 hours..is all of this normal?? Short naps are still a problem..

Offline becj86

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Re: 6mo new to EASY
« Reply #24 on: April 12, 2016, 09:42:17 am »
Can you post the last few days' EAS?

eg.
7 - wake
10 - nap
11 - wake, feed
2 - nap
etc.

He may need a night feed and to go back to sleep if he wakes at 10-10.5hr.

Offline Batool huzaifa

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Re: 6mo new to EASY
« Reply #25 on: April 13, 2016, 04:59:02 am »
Honestly there is not a fixed routine for him coz if his varying sleep times n varying lengty if naps..but i follow the easy pattern no matter what...its somewat like this

Wu: between 7 n 8:30
E: between 7 n 8:30 depending on wu time
A: 2 to 2.5 hrs ..9:30 to 10:00 breakfast
S:between 10 n 11till 11:15 or 12:15
E:12:30
A:2 to 2.5 hrs...wch includes bath also
S:between 2:15 n 2:45..for 1.5 hours
E:5:00
A: 3 to 4 hours
E: 7:40
BT: 8:00 to 8:15...asleep by 8:30 usualyy

Offline becj86

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Re: 6mo new to EASY
« Reply #26 on: April 13, 2016, 06:45:24 am »
How are your nights with that routine?

Offline Batool huzaifa

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Re: 6mo new to EASY
« Reply #27 on: April 13, 2016, 07:04:42 am »
Besides i realy want him to take a catnap after his 2nd nap..but he is not ready to sleep no matter what i do..then at the bedtime he looks overtired..he has also strted waking up every 3 to 4 hours in the night...so naturaly he cannot be hungry in 3 hours after his dinner atleast..but he still wakes up..wants to bf..but then goes to sleep on his own..yesterday he played for 1.5 hrs in the night and then eventualy went to sleep.....so u see he is not being consistent in anything..changes are happening everyday and i dont know how to respond to them..its going to be a month this thursday since he has been sleeping on his own n following easy..but still sometimes taking half an hour to go to sleep wid crying..lots of things need to be sorted out so please help!

Offline Batool huzaifa

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Re: 6mo new to EASY
« Reply #28 on: April 13, 2016, 07:06:46 am »
Yeah 1 more thing..in between all this he once slept for staright 7 hours in the night before 4 days i guess..which was a miracle i beleive..but tht night he slept at 11:30 since we were out

Offline becj86

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Re: 6mo new to EASY
« Reply #29 on: April 13, 2016, 08:18:36 am »
Yes, I was wondering... I expected the long happy waking in the middle of the night - your first and second A times are not long enough! Really they should be 2:45 to 3hr I think, Try 2:45 first as the first nap is only slightly undertired.

Why do you want him to take a catnap?

Have a read of this: All about the 3-2 transition- 5/6 months

Offline Batool huzaifa

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Re: 6mo new to EASY
« Reply #30 on: April 13, 2016, 14:52:00 pm »
Because i think he is overtired till his bedtime comes..and the frst 2 naps are gettting earlier and earlier day by day bcoz he is waking up early in the morning..and it gets realy hard to stay him awake for more than 2.5 hours.. but i will still try 2:75 hours..i just hope he doesnt becum overtired and his horribl 45 mins naps dont hit me back..i wish the nights are also longer and with less awakenings..2 are fine..but not more than that..today i made him have the catnap and he took 45 mins to go to sleep at bedtime...horrifying it was!!thanksss bec for the link:))

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Re: 6mo new to EASY
« Reply #31 on: April 13, 2016, 21:22:26 pm »
I think the main issue is that he's not getting a proper restorative nap after that first A time, so increasing should help.  FX for you :)

Offline Batool huzaifa

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Re: 6mo new to EASY
« Reply #32 on: April 14, 2016, 12:55:12 pm »
Tried 2.75 hours...frst nap was 50 mins..and for the second nap he went to sleep within 5 mins but then he woke up aftrr 15 mins..i went to check so found a dirty diaper..after cleaning and chnging him he never went back to sleep...tried twice each for half an hour..finaly in my third attempt he went to sleep at 5 p.m and woke up after 25 mins...and now its 9 p.m ..its already been an hour i have put him in his bed but he is still wide awake playing :'(

Offline Batool huzaifa

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Re: 6mo new to EASY
« Reply #33 on: April 14, 2016, 13:42:43 pm »
For some reason he needs me in the room..i lie beside him pretending to sleep then sometimes he sleeps after making lots of efforts to wake me up ..other times he cries n cries till i wake up n settles him..besides he finds 1 or the other activity in his bed to indulge in...like pulling bedsheet..playing with the pillow which stimulates him.. n if i pat him or he sees me awake he also becomes wide awake.. beacause of this inconsistency his wake up tomes have strted varying too.. should i let him sleep or wake him up at his scheduled time??

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Re: 6mo new to EASY
« Reply #34 on: April 14, 2016, 14:37:52 pm »
Plus he has been very clingy this week...i suppose its because i am leaving him to cry in his bed...he is not even ready to play without me...the moment i leave him he strts crying

Offline Batool huzaifa

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Re: 6mo new to EASY
« Reply #35 on: April 15, 2016, 03:24:57 am »
Agaij tried 2 hrs 45 mons in the morning..he woke up in 55 mins..n he seems so so tired...

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Re: 6mo new to EASY
« Reply #36 on: April 15, 2016, 08:51:15 am »
If you don't increase his A time so he is tired enough to take a long nap, he will get overtired, just as you are noticing. The whole point of EASY is that baby's life is predictable. When you change things up, he can't self-regulate and take the sleep he needs when he's given the opportunity. He doesn't have the capacity to decide to sleep in if he's kept up an extra 3 hr in the evening here and there.

2hr45 is to short for him, we've already established that and you're just reinforcing that in my mind by seeing these short naps of 50-55 min after 2:45.

Please, please don't leave him in his cot to cry - I'm sure you're aware BW is totally against any form of controlled crying or cry it out - if baby cries for you, he needs you. Its actually really normal for a baby to need you, when he needs you, its important to respond to reinforce his trust in you - that's what keeps him feeling secure and safe which allows him to sleep and grow.

He must be nearly 7 months old by now, average A time would be around 3:15, so its definitely worth increasing to see how he goes. I know it feels wrong to increase his awake time when he's tired but its what has to be done when he's not awake long enough to take a long restorative nap.

Offline Batool huzaifa

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Re: 6mo new to EASY
« Reply #37 on: April 15, 2016, 15:36:11 pm »
Yeah i would definitely give it a try tomorrow...unless we have to go out ...this is also a v big prob..we have to go out atleast on weekends but since he doesnt sleep outside all his schedule becomes upside down which is why i want his bedtime to be late normally so he doesnt get oveetired wem we are out on weekends..anyways thts secondary..first i realy need to work on his naps...will try tom and keep u updated...thanks bec for all ur support n advice

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Re: 6mo new to EASY
« Reply #38 on: April 16, 2016, 06:01:40 am »
Last night he slept at 11 coz we were out..yestrday he was up from 3 p.m till 8:30 p.m wen he finally took a nap of 25 mins..though he slept at 11 he woke up today at 8:a.m.. woke up multiple times in the night for bf... i put him to bed for his frst nap at 11:15 a.m.. he dint sleep but cried lots n lots...finaly i rocked him n slept in my arms around 11:30.. woke up at 12...i tried to make him sleep again till 12..he dint sleep and there was unconsolable crying..he dint stop crying even in my arms..at 1.00 i strted talking to him..he stopped crying..we cuddled and talked in the same dark room till 1:40.. then i took him out...

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Re: 6mo new to EASY
« Reply #39 on: April 16, 2016, 07:37:38 am »
Again made him sleep at 3:05.. he woke up at 3:35

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Re: 6mo new to EASY
« Reply #40 on: April 16, 2016, 09:17:21 am »
Ok, so you're regularly out at night til 11pm and in a place LO can't sleep? Is there somewhere at this place that you can set up a cot or pram that's quiet and dark so he can sleep? Is it the same place every time?

It sounds like he's (understandably) really overtired from such a late night and short interrupted night sleep.

What is your plan when he is going to school and has to be there at 8/9am? He will have to be in bed earlier than 11 then (I know its a long way off but if you shift your day so he's regularly going to bed at 11pm and getting up for the day around 10 or 11am, things could well be very tricky when he's older).

Offline Lindsay27

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Re: 6mo new to EASY
« Reply #41 on: April 16, 2016, 13:15:52 pm »
Yeah i would definitely give it a try tomorrow...unless we have to go out ...this is also a v big prob..we have to go out atleast on weekends but since he doesnt sleep outside all his schedule becomes upside down which is why i want his bedtime to be late normally so he doesnt get oveetired wem we are out on weekends..anyways thts secondary..first i realy need to work on his naps...will try tom and keep u updated...thanks bec for all ur support n advice
I don't think the fact that you are out on weekends is secondary, I think it is a primary reason why you can't get a routine sorted.  The idea behind a routine is consistency, and if every weekend he is out/up until 11pm then it is absolutely going to take 2-3 days for him to recover, at which point you are near the weekend again.  I think if you are going to be out late every weekend then you really need to lose any idea of sleep training or having a regular routine. You can't expect your LO to live the life you do, he is a baby, you are not.  If I want to go out my DH stays home, if my DH wants to go out, I stay home...if we both want to go out, we get a babysitter.  You don't "have" to go out on weekends, you have to put the needs of your LO before your own.

It sounds like he's (understandably) really overtired from such a late night and short interrupted night sleep.
^^Bec is absolutely correct, it is simply a case of being chronically overtired.



Offline Batool huzaifa

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Re: 6mo new to EASY
« Reply #42 on: April 16, 2016, 15:40:00 pm »
I know he is chronically overtired but how to end it? We are new in singapore and usually dont go out because of lo but there are times wen we have to go..like yesterday we had office dinner at my husband s company... besides it takes a loy of time in travelling since we have to use mrt and buses to commute... i dont go to the same place..its different everytime ..like a mall or so.. and its always crowded..its impossible to find a quiet dark place..but i watch other childrem fast asleep in their stroller..not even least bothered wats going on  around...but my lo wide awake...if i go out i ll miss euther his nap or his bedtime...its imposible not to miss either of them.. i know i not being consistent but i had thought once he is on his routine then he ll follow it even if m nt at hme..i gave him 2 weeks consistency...dint go out anywhr...but how is it posibl to not go nywhr even on the weekends..today he took 1.25 hours to go to sleep at night ...so tired and confused..

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Re: 6mo new to EASY
« Reply #43 on: April 16, 2016, 15:41:47 pm »
And i love him being asleep by 8..but i want to chnge it just to accomodate the weekends...really dont know wat to do!

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Re: 6mo new to EASY
« Reply #44 on: April 16, 2016, 16:03:48 pm »
I know he is chronically overtired but how to end it?
You end it by starting from scratch.  Commit to staying at home for a solid week or 2 and focusing on strictly his routine.  If you don't follow his routine regularly the same thing is just going to continue to  happen over and over again.

i dont go to the same place..its different everytime ..like a mall or so.. and its always crowded..its impossible to find a quiet dark place..but i watch other childrem fast asleep in their stroller..not even least bothered wats going on  around...but my lo wide awake...if i go out i ll miss euther his nap or his bedtime...its imposible not to miss either of them
Again I think this is a case of you needing to fit your life around your LO and not expecting your LO to fit his life around yours.  It is fine to go out, everyone needs that time, but you have to expect that if you do his day is going to be off, and if you do that every day he is not going to sustain a routine.  And just because everyone else's LOs appear to be asleep in strollers does not mean that you should expect your DS to do the same.  Every LO is different.  My DS was spirited and would never sleep out and about...it is just the way he was.

i know i not being consistent but i had thought once he is on his routine then he ll follow it even if m nt at hme..i gave him 2 weeks consistency...dint go out anywhr...but how is it posibl to not go nywhr even on the weekends..today he took 1.25 hours to go to sleep at night ...so tired and confused..
The point of being consistent is to keep the routine the same the majority of the time - so predictable naps at home, a predictable bed time.  You can't expect to dedicate 2 weeks to establish a routine and then completely throw him off by never sticking to what you had established.

And i love him being asleep by 8..but i want to chnge it just to accomodate the weekends...really dont know wat to do!
Again, you can't expect him to be in bed by 8pm 5 days of the week and then 11pm the other days without it impacting him, he's just a baby.  You need to accommodate your weekends around him, not the other way around.  And if you can't, then that's fine, but don't expect him to magically follow a routine when you are continually allowing him to become so overtired on weekends.  What you need to do is either stop keeping him out so late, or stop thinking he's going to have any kind of routine with that kind of schedule.



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Re: 6mo new to EASY
« Reply #45 on: April 16, 2016, 19:55:41 pm »
What you need to do is either stop keeping him out so late, or stop thinking he's going to have any kind of routine with that kind of schedule.
I agree with pp.
Honey it seems you are exhausted and your LO is totally exhausted too.  I'm really not sure how long either of you can continue with the way things are.  I have just read through your thread and honestly cannot see an answer for you, it's just not possible to "have it all" with a baby.  Babies need sleep to grow and let their bodies and brains develop.  As parents we commit to our baby's needs as an investment on their physical and emotional health.
Whilst I understand that being new in a town you want to network and socialise to form a group of friends around you, this is something people invest in to build relationships and friendships which are important to an adult's emotional and mental needs and it builds some level of support network around you.  I also understand that your DH has work commitments and it sounds like he needs to meet or socialise with colleagues or business partners to further his employment and career, again this is an investment of time and energy for the good of his career and family finances. It is understandable in the normal way of things.
However - all of these things just do not work together, they don't, something has to give.
At the moment it seems that time and energy are being invested in friendship and career networking while your LOs needs as a very young baby are put to one side.

i know i not being consistent but i had thought once he is on his routine then he ll follow it even if m nt at hme..i gave him 2 weeks consistency...dint go out anywhr...but how is it posibl to not go nywhr even on the weekends..
Reading your thread I really don't see a place where you put 2 wks of sleep training into place.  There was a day, something like day 8 or 9 since beginning EASY that you had him out all day and he only napped 20 mins.  Followed by a mid-week night out where he was up until around 11 - 11.30pm just a couple of nights later.   Approximately 5 days later he is again out and doesn't sleep and a further night out approx 5 days after that where he went to bed at 11.30pm.
You say you've been doing EASY for 1 month and that he was sleep trained but I see nowhere in this thread that he ever achieved a suitable or sustainable routine.
You also say you would expect that once a baby is on a routine they should sleep anywhere, this is not what Tracy said in her BW books, neither is it what we have all experienced here.  From memory Tracy said babies should be put in their own bed, otherwise it is akin to expecting you to sleep on the floor in the middle of a motorway, you simply would not do it.  Many of the BW community have found ways to adapt the EASY routine to enable some time out and about to fulfil commitments and that may include some regular naps in the stroller or a sling or in the car, but these are generally routines which fit in with LOs needs as a valued member of the family whilst also taking into account rest of the family needs - it is a balance and a compromise all round, not an expectation for LO to just fit in, sleep anywhere and any time to fit in with everyone else's needs at the detriment to their own.
The inconsolable crying - my guess is he's absolutely fed up as well as over tired.  Babies absolutely love routine and this is just not being provided.

Whilst there will always be support here for you I am not convinced there is anything you can be helped with. Not unless you choose to change your life style and put the needs of your baby as a higher priority. It seems your expectations at the moment are unrealistic and not the kind of expectations Tracy taught us to have in her Baby Whisperer books.
It seems to me this is a time for some decisions to be made.

Many hugs too, it sounds terribly difficult for you to try to accommodate everyone's needs and perhaps feeling like your own needs are bottom of the list.  I expect you are also exhausted from these late nights and broken sleep, then not even getting a chance to rest up when baby naps as he is not napping more than 20 mins.