Trouble with naps - 16 week baby

[tathi-b]

Hello,

I'm new to this forum and I've been reading loads of posts on the topic but I can't seem to find the solution!

My baby has been on EASY since she was about 7 weeks and it's been wonderful up to now.  She's 16 weeks and napping has become a nightmare!

Her EASY was pretty standard

Wake up around 7am
Eat pretty immediately
Play until 8:15
Sleep - 8:30

Eat at 10am
Play until 11:15
Sleep 11:30

Eat at 1pm
Play until 2:15
Sleep 2:30

Eat at 4pm
Play until 5/5:15
Sleep 5:15

Wake 6pm
Bath 6:30
Eat 7pm
Bed 7:15/7:30

DF - 10:30/10:45

Straight through the night to 7am! I'm blessed...

About 3 weeks ago she started resisting naps, waking up after about a half hour into the first nap. I battled her for 2 weeks and resisted putting her on a 4 hour EASY, I felt she was too young; but her alert times were increasing on their own so last week I put her on the 4 hour EASY.  Starting at 7am like before as she sleeps well in the night.

But we are still having troubles with the first and now the second nap!  She sleeps for a half hour/ 45 minutes and wakes up crying.  The interesting thing is that my baby rarely cries, only if she is in pain or some sort of discomfort.  I normally find her in her cot talking to herself... She is healthy, not in any discomfort or pain that I can tell but she can't seem to get back to sleep on her own. By 4:30/ 5pm she is shattered and has been napping for 1.5 hours only to go back to sleep at 7pm.  She isn't getting enough sleep during the day and that is, as expected, affecting her mood.  I'm also not getting anything done as I'm going into her room every 20-30 minutes.

I think it's worth mentioning that she is an Angel/ Textbook baby who generally sleeps very well and has done so since going on EASY.  I've always put her down awake and she settles herself.

Any insight will be greatly appreciated, I am out of ideas!

[Bella89]

Hi there, and welcome to BW forums!
4 month sleep regression is a very difficult time to get through. Most of it is developmental and it passes, but there is always something we can try.

Have you think of increasing her A times a little? Maybe starting with the first one in a day?

[weaver]

You should note that 30 or 45 min WUs generally mean different things - 30 mins is usually OT and 45 mins UT, so that can tell you a lot about what might need adjusting.

When you made the move to 4hr EASY did you do it suddenly? A lot of babies need a gradual increase, a sudden increase in all A times can cause OT.

[tathi-b]

Thanks for the insight! It seems to be UT as I've been trying to do more activities and that sometimes works.

We moved slowly, over a couple of weeks. 10-15 minutes at a time. She was doing well. I get the impression that there is a lot happening for her at the minute; learning to sit up and her hand coordination is much better so she is very interested in taking her dummy out and put it back on and often when she wakes herself up a little she starts to babble to herself and to cackle - none of these are helpful for sleepiness!!

[tathi-b]

I'm still stumped and not sure how to progress.  I don't think she is under tired.  I've been watching her sleep cues very closely and it's almost as if she has regressed to a 3hour EASY in the morning and moved herself to a 4 hour EASY in the afternoon.  Which makes it very difficult to schedule around!

Today was a mare of a day!  Thankfully she sleeps 12 hours in the night (albeit with a 5 minute waking last night at 4am).

Today's EASY looked like this - I'm so confused.

E - 7am

S- 8:30

E - 10:15

S - 12:20

E - 2pm

Here is where it all went wrong!

Started showing signs of tiredness around 3:15 so I took her up and did the nap routine.

S - 4pm (45 minutes to put my baby down is about 40 minutes more than is normal for her!)

Woke up after 35 minutes

Down at 6:30 for the night and is still asleep. 

The whole time I was with her for the 4pm nap (which is so, so late!) she was resisting sleep.  She uses a dummy to sleep (and only that) so she was taking it out of her mouth, she was grabbing at her feet, bringing her legs up, at one point she was horizontal in the cot she was moving that much!  I could tell that she was shattered because she was crying and fussing but at the same time it was almost as she was doing everything in her power to stay awake! 

[Bella89]

I wonder what other mammas have to say, because every 4mo regression is different, but I think she needed more time awake.
If she napped 12:20-2 I think closer to 4 would be better:/ Maybe it's just me.
What do you think?

[tathi-b]

It's definitely worth a try...  She just had her vaccines yesterday so everything is a little up in the air today.  I'm also going on holiday later this week for 2 weeks - it seems like it's all happening at the same time.

What did your baby's sleep regression look like?  Could this be something different I wonder?

x

[tathi-b]

She won't nap, refuses, she is tired, but it seems to be a game.  I don't get it!

Up until 2 weeks ago my daughter was brilliant with naps.  She was on a standard 3 hour EASY starting at 7am and you could pretty much set your clock to this girl! She started resisting naps, so we started transitioning her to 4 hour EASY and in that process we seem to have broken her sleep!  I'm desperate, I can't live with a crying baby who refuses to sleep. 

She takes her own dummy out of her mouth (and a few times has thrown it out of the cot), she stirs and kicks her legs up in the air, she cries, she tosses and turns but mainly she vocally complains (can't really call it talking!).  From birth she has been put down awake and settles herself to sleep, with the exception of when she is feeling ill she is generally a sleepy, happy, well spirited baby! I've tried a longer wind down time but the minute I put her in her cot the complaining starts, the dummy comes out and the world comes to an end.  I never realised that babies this small could be this adamant on not sleeping!

As an example, I took her into her room an hour and 10 minutes ago!  I left after an hour and despite knowing that switching isn't ideal I just couldn't do it anymore.  At one point she was crying so hard that I sat with her and she finally looked like she was about to fall asleep but the minute I put her back in the cot her eyes shot open and she smiled as if the 10 seconds that she was drowsy had recharged her batteries!  The nanny is in there now trying and she is still complaining and resisting sleep.

She sleeps well in the night (OK last night no so much but she had had vaccines yesterday so for the minute I'm putting it down to that).

Like I said, before this she was brilliant!  She'd look tired and I'd take her up, change nappy, close curtains, have a little talk, put into gro bag, give her dummy and I would come out of the room leaving her sleepy in the cot and she would settle herself.  No fuss and certainly nothing like what I'm seeing lately. What changed?  I don't understand!!!  Surely after over 2 1/2 hours awake she is tired and WANTS to sleep?  God knows that after each sleep battle with her I'm tired and want to sleep!

Any insight would be so greatly appreciated!

[ameliebob]

big hugs to you. My DS was the same. I tried everything and it started to get better at 5 months. He took a lot of naps in the stroller or sling at this age as it was the only thing that was working not ideal I know. he took short naps until 12 months when we we shortened his morning nap to 20 mins. Now he's on one nap and it lasts 1.5 to 2.5 hours. Things will get better I promise, even if I know it's hard to believe right now 

[tathi-b]

Until 2 weeks ago she was a dream sleeper and it all seems to have fallen the edge of a cliff! I've even tried getting her to sleep on me but she has never really liked that. It's heartbreaking when they are so desperate to sleep and just can't for one reason or another. Thanks for the encouragement, it's nice to know I haven't somehow broken her!!

[ameliebob]

That's the 4 month old sleep regression. It's hard but it will pass.

You know what worked for my son? Vacuuming the house with him in the moby wrap and his pacifier!! Our vacuum is pretty loud and it soothed him right away 
I just hope my daughter won't be as tough as my son was 

[Bella89]

Oh, with us it was all over the place. It was 2 weeks of nothing worked, shorter A times, longer A times... Nothing:/

[Bella89]

Just wanted to let you know that I merged 2 of your similar posts just to keep everything clear and organized;)

[tathi-b]

It really hope it only lasts a few weeks! 😳

What I don't understand is that before all this started she was able to sleep well and on her own. She has always been an active sleeper but would settle herself back down easily. This morning the party started at 4am! There was no amount of shush/ pat, dummy putting in, cuddling, cajoling or bribing that put her back to sleep. It's so confusing!! Is this something that goes away and then they sleep again? I'm in a panic because everything I read says that these changes are permanent?

[Bella89]

Please, believe me. There is no such a thing as a permanent change in sleep habits with a child as little as 4mo.
I think Tracy mentioned somewhere, that before 6mo anything can be changed in 3 days if you are determined.

Please, do not worry. I remember when DS woke up at 4-5am in the morning during 6mo regression. I was determined, so I started the day at 4am and slowly increasem his A time. This somehow send a message to his body that he will have to last longer so he better be well rested In 2 weeks everything was 7 to 7 again. Now, he is 14mo, I just told my DH that it's somewhat sad that he cannot fall asleep with me, but has to be alone in the room to fall asleep.At 4mo he was handful. So that is your proof

Please write down what the day looked like today/yesterday and we can figure it out. Maybe she was OT...

[ameliebob]

Now, he is 14mo, I just told my DH that it's somewhat sad that he cannot fall asleep with me

My son is exactly the same!! wish we could cuddle to sleep sometimes but it seems impossible for him he just wants to play

[tathi-b]

Sorry for taking a while to come back. I was travelling with Baby. If her sleep wasn't broken this may do it! 15 hours on a plane and 7 hours time difference. It's the middle of the night and so long she has done really well, only woke up once for a couple of hours and a feed.

I'm thinking that the best way to tackle this, given I'm now away from home for 2 weeks, might be to go with the flow a bit. Not expect her to sleep as well as she used to. I'll keep her in the feeding schedule though. Hopefully this 4 month madness with either end soon!

What do you ladies think?

X

[tathi-b]

Sorry for taking a while to get back online! We were on a long flight and then resettling her.

I wanted to share a success story!

I'm not sure if it was the 15 hour flight that dos it but something has definitely clicked and her sleep has improved so much over the past few days!

I've been trying an app called Sound Sleeper which seems to be helping her a lot. It has a shush sound. It's as if she's hypnotised when I put it on, her little eye start closing and she starts relaxing! I've tried it for 2 days now and she has slept well. When she starts waking up I turn it back in (wake to sleep) and she doesn't even wake up! Last night she only woke up once but I didn't even have to lift her from the cot. She was awake for about 40 minutes but didn't cry, just shuffled in the cot and slept again. She kept on waking herself up but would sleep again with no tears.

I've taken her back to a 3 hour EASY. Such a long flight has clearly made her very tired, despite sleeping a lot during the flight itself.

The interesting thing to me is that her sleep cues have changed. She doesn't yawn anymore, I can see her starting to get agitated and more vocal. But where a few weeks ago she would give the clear yawn of tiredness now it's legs and arms everywhere. So for the moment we are going by the clock; an hour and 15 minutes and I start winding her down. It's worked well so far but it's only 2 days so not getting sassy about it!

Maybe we are turning a corner?

Xx

[Bella89]

Congrats!!!
Tackling such a trip with such a time difference is a huge thing!!

I'm glad you're doing well. Sometimes it's just like that. Time goes and they're changing... Knowing her signs it's an important thing

PS. It took me a while to get back to you as well. Sorry for that

[tathi-b]

We got very lucky with the trip! She was pretty good on the flight, slept about half the flight in small intervals which I felt was pretty good!

We are out here to see family so have a much more fluid schedule but she is sleeping through to 4am. And the nap resistance seems to have lessened since I started which the shush app. I'll let you know how it goes when we get back home!x

[Bella89]

have a great trip!