4 month sleep regression?

[Lindsay27]

I would say that weaning the swaddle is absolutely contributing to those NW.  We tired to wean last week and had exactly the same experience after which I decided neither of us were ready and promptly strapped her back into that straight jacket lol.  If you are ready to wean then keep going, but just expect a few rough nights until he gets a handle on him having his hand loose.

I've heard of a product called a Zipadee Zip which is a sleep sac in a star shape that is supposed to help with swaddle weaning - they are able to move their arms but not enough so that they are flailing everywhere.  I haven't tried it myself but I've seen in recommended around here.

As for the paci, it is completely up to you, but if it were me I'd hold out a bit longer to see if he learns to put it back in himself with his free hands.  If he does then it shouldn't become a prop, if he doesn't then it might be time to think about weaning that also.

[Ulrica83]

Yup, that's what I thought - I was afraid of weaning the swaddle.. But since he's rolling all over the place, we don't really have a choice. Tonight we just removed the swaddle all together. He slept solidly from 6.30-9pm, but then woke up maybe once every 60-90 minutes between 9pm - 4 am, then he fed and slept until 6.30 am (probably super tired).

I've been trying to get a hold of the Zipadee Zip (or the Baby Merlin Magical sleep suit) but they are nowhere to be found in Sweden. And delivery + shipping + customs from the US would cost me over 100 USD, so I just sewed a Zipadee Zip of my own last night. We're trying it for the first time now, during the first nap of the day: he fell asleep on his own (with the paci) after 10 minutes of babbling. BUT, the first nap has always been the easiest, so..

Regarding the paci, I think we'll keep it for now and see how it goes. If we're up all night doing the paci dance, then we'll just have to get rid of that too.

Thank you again for your thoughts!

[Lindsay27]

Oh my goodness you must be exhausted!  I think you will probably have a few rough nights before it starts to get better, hang in there!  This is going to be me soon!

Good thought in the paci I think.  Once his arms are free and he can control his movements he may learn to replug himself. My DS did thank goodness, we'd just leave about 10 in his crib so he could always find one lol

[Ulrica83]

Update! Nights are getting better. No swaddle now for 6 days - and it has actually gone better than I thought. He now sleeps 7-10.30 pm, then wakes up for "dream feed". Sleeps until 2 am, resettle/paci. Sleeps until 4 am, eats, sleeps until 6 pm. Fusses/sleeps until 6.45 am and then I give up and just get up for the day!

So, now we're starting to think that maybe we should remove the paci - since I believe that's why he's waking up/fusses in the early morning hours.. He's not able to replug himself yet.

A times are between 1 hr 45 min - 2 hrs now, and itīs going really well. We still have 4 naps per day most of the time, sometimes 3. Duration 1-2 hrs and a catnap in the afternoon. So over all - everything is improving.

How are things going for you? Have you started weaning from the swaddle? I can actually recommend the ZipadeeZip, it has worked for us (I think?). 

[Lindsay27]

Great progress!  You are a braver soul than I...we are still swaddling.  She just settles so easily with the swaddle I don't know how I am going to being myself to stop!  My DD wakes and rolls around in the early morning hours too, around 5am usually, and while I can usually resettle her, the sleep is more fitful.

If you find that he is regularly doing 1 nap that is an hour or less you may need to push those A times again.  They really move up fast between 4-6 months.

[Ulrica83]

I totally understand - the swaddle is amazing when it works.

We removed the pacifier yesterday! He was waking up every single time it fell out, so we were doing the "paci dance" every nap and at night time.. We were a bit nervous about it all, since we just recently took away the swaddle. DS cried for almost 40 minutes around BT, but he calmed down with sssh/pat and holding hands. Slept really well for 3 hrs, ate, slept 3 more hrs then started to fuss. Cried off and on for 1,5 hrs, then BF, sssh/pat and fell asleep - and slept SO well until 6 am. Me and DH got another 2 hrs of shut eye - amazing. Every nap today has been really good without the paci: 1,5 + 2 + 0,75 hrs. So now we're just hoping BT tonight will be easier..

I will really try to push the A times! He's now managing 1,45 + 2 + 2 + 2,15. So the next step is going to be pushing the first A time.. Right?

[Lindsay27]

Amazing progress! You guys have done fantastic!

Yes pushing the first A is likely the next step.  I find our first A is always usually a little less as well, sometimes she can only manage 2hrs where the other A's she doing somewhere between 2.15-2.5hrs. 

I think we need to make the push to wean the swaddle as she's starting to want to sleep on her side.  I need to mentally prepare myself for the lack of sleep lol. 

[Ulrica83]

Thank you! Yes, we will continue working on the A times. I would say that has been the key for us in order to overcome this 4 month sleep regression.

BT yesterday: 20 minutes of crying/fussing, then sleep. Some crying after 3 am feed, but that was due to hunger.. The breast feeding is almost not enough for him now, so I had to add some formula even at night time. Naps today have all been amazing without the paci. Removing the pacifier har been the best move we've made so far (even though falling asleep is a bit harder now, he doesn't wake up so often).

I will keep my fingers crossed for you as you start to wean the swaddle! As you said earlier, just a couple of rough nights..

[Ulrica83]

Yes pushing the first A is likely the next step.  I find our first A is always usually a little less as well, sometimes she can only manage 2hrs where the other A's she doing somewhere between 2.15-2.5hrs. 

I need your thoughts again! Our third nap (the cat nap) has gone bananas for the last four days. LO is screaming, crying and will not settle. After maybe 1 hr of this, he falls asleep out of pure exhaustion. We're not used to him crying, and it's just awful. We've tried PU/PD, but it just makes him even more upset, so we're doing Shhh/pat - not so successfully.

Naps are 1,5+1,5+0,75. A times are now 2+2,25+2,5+2,25 hrs. Well, if you count the screaming/crying before the third nap it's up to 3,5 hrs - which is not good.

Any suggestions?

[Lindsay27]

What time does your last nap typically end?  Sometimes if our 2 naps are long enough I pull BT forward a bit and we don't do the CN.  That said the morning nap needs to be 1.45-2hrs before that can happen otherwise it's too long of an A to BT with no CN.

I wonder if you stretch the first A a bit if it will get you a bit longer nap?  Even if the A is 15mins longer and the nap is 15mins longer that pushes you 30mins closer to BT at the end of the day, yk?

[Ulrica83]

Thanks again for your quick response!

The cat nap used to be around 5 pm, but is now around 3 or 4 pm (as we're trying to go from 4 to 3 naps). We've adjusted BT to around 6.30 pm, otherwise the last A time is way too long. Also, our DS has now started waking up quite early.. The past 5 days it's been 5.45 or 6 am (it used to be around 6.45 or 7 am). So, that's one major thing that throws our routine off a bit and moves te cat nap earlier.

So, for the past 5 days it's roughly:

WU 5.45 (I let him babble and coo for 45 minutes, he doesn't fall back asleep - but he's not unhappy either).
E 6.30 (VERY hungry)
A 6.45
S 7.45-9.15/9.30 (He manages this on his own now, no need for help or resettling. Wakes super happy.)

E 10.00
A 10.15
S 11.30-1.00

E 2.00
A 2.15
S 3.15/3.30/4 (screams, cries, takes forever to settle. We've tried earlier and later nap times here, no improvement. Don't know if OT or UT?) Sleeps for 30 minutes, wakes not so happy.

E 5.45/6.00
A 6.15
S/BT 6.30/6.45 (cries for maybe 5-15 minutes)

As I told you before, the nights have improved a lot since we removed the paci. He sleeps from 6.30-10 pm, feeds. Then 10.15-03 am, feeds. Then sleeps 03.15-05.45, babbles happily until I pick him up at around 6.30.

So, I will try pushing the first A time even further, and maybe get a longer first nap? Do you think this may improve the cat nap situation? Do you have any advice regarding the earlier WU?

[Lindsay27]

Okay, yes I see...the early starts are kind of perpetuating an early day in general.  I actually think that first nap might actually be a sort of extension of night sleep.   We get the 5:30/45am WUs too but I try to treat them as a NW or AP if needed.  So I first try to resettle in the crib and if that doesn't work I will rock her, bring her in with me, hold her...anything really to get her to sleep a little bit longer and start the day off later.  Even if I can get a 6:30 WU we go with that, which pushes everything out a little more.  I think if you maybe try that and a slightly longer first A then it will cut your naps down to 3 and hopefully he won't fight the nap in the late afternoon.  Does that make sense?

[Ulrica83]

Thank you again, I really appreciate you taking your time answering all my questions!

We tried yesterday pushing the first A time to 2 hrs 15 min, and he wouldn't settle at all for the first nap. He screamed for 1 hr and then "passed out" after 3 hrs 15 min wake time.. Then the next A time was short and he was quite cranky. Nap nr 2 was 1 hr (usually 1,5-2). And so, the dreaded nap nr 3: he cried so hard I was worried he would stop breathing. After almost 2,5 hrs of screaming, he went down for 30 minutes (4 hrs A time total). So, yesterday was a DISASTER. I think I cried almost as much as LO (and DH).

This night everything was off, he ate here and there, woke up several times. WU now 4.45 am. Left him to babble for 20 min, wouldn't fall asleep again. I tried to resettle in the crib for 20 min, wouldn't work. Picked him up, tried to feed him but he wasn't hungry. So, finally, after 1,5 hrs I picked him up and here we are.

It feels like we're going backwards.. We have an unhappy little guy who now cries for several hours a day (which he hasn't done ever) and I'm a mess. Please help!

[Lindsay27]

BW is all about listening to your baby so if you think the A time push was too much, then just scale back.  It is all trial and error so we never know what will happen until we try.  I tried a 2.25 A time the other day and ended up with OT naps, so I knew we'd gone too far.  The other thing to remember is that the odd bad day isn't necessarily a good representation of what your LO can handle, they have off days just like we do

[Ulrica83]

Thank you, that is so true. I went back to 1 hr 45 min for the first A time today, and he went down without any crying. Only slept for 45 minutes though, so probably a bit UT.. Haha, it's so difficult to find the perfect A time!

We felt we've had to take a step backwards the past week. We're back to 4 naps. LO falls asleep more easily, without crying, in the stroller - so we go for walks several times a day. Even though the naps are only 40-50 minutes, LO seems more rested and happier. He slept really well tonight - and so did we. We needed to charge our batteries before starting over, with a new plan.

So, for now, we just do what works ("planned AP"), we figure that it's better to get some sleep - even if it's not in his own bed - than to scream your lungs out for 2 hrs and then only get a 30 min nap.. Hopefully the wind will change soon and we will be back on track!