A time for 10 week old

[Mandy.kamal]

I've been slowing trying to get my daughter to nap in her room. She falls asleep great on her own (lay down drowsy) but I have the hardest time getting her to go past the 30-45 min cycle. She wakes crying and I'll shush pat and sometimes it helps, sometimes not.

I have a very needy 3 year old so I can't give it all the time I need to shush pat for 30 mins. But she does this every nap. Mostly I wear her in a carrier and she will wake but go back to sleep fairly quickly.

Wondering if my A times are wrong. Is a 10 week old closer to 1.5 hours A or 1h 15m? I know it all depends on the baby but I'm wondering if that's where I'm going wrong.

Thank you!!

[Mandy.kamal]

I found the post for average A times and it does suggest 1h 15-20m.

And just to refresh, that means them asleep by then correct? So start wind down at the hour mark?

Also, I'm going to try and go in around 35 mins to catch her waking and soothe back to sleep. Do I start timing from when she first falls asleep? She will wake a few times every min or so in the beginning after I lay her down.

She has never, ever slept longer than 45 mins without soothing back to sleep. Even when she's on my chest or in the carrier. So I probably have a lot of work to do to teach her

Here's our day so far:
Up and E at 7:00
8:00 wind down
8:10 in bed, fell straight to sleep
Out cold without paci by 8:12
8:49 Stir, woke 8:51
Lots of squirming and paci replugs and in and out of sleep and fussing
9:35 fully calm, 9:38 asleep. Back up screaming at 9:42

I'm exhausted and getting her up now. She won't stop crying and it's close to the 10 am feed

[Mandy.kamal]

Today only got worse since she was OT after a lousy first nap. All her feeds have been off and she's fussy. I've AP'd all her other naps after the 11:00 nap. My 3 year old colored with marker all over my couch while I tried to extend her nap. Been a horrible day.

I've asked my mom to come help on Thursday and Friday. So if like any advice before I start really trying for these next 3 days.

[Haribo2012]

Hi Hun just giving u a little bump as I have an 11 week old but things aren't great so no advice, but I'm sure someone will come along soon. Hugs your not alone xx

[Mandy.kamal]

Thank you!

[lauradj]

Hi hon!  I'm so sorry you some how were missed!  Honestly, I've done the two under two dance and if I couldn't resettle within 15-20mins I just popped my LO in the baby carrier or stroller and headed out for our activity.  There is only so much you can do when you already have a toddler zipping around. 
W2S sounds like a good plan.  The approach is basically that you enter the room and, very gentle, get them to stir about 10 mins before you know they usually wake.  You don't want to move them much, just enough to get a finger twitch, a lip movement or something like that.  My toddler is currently zipping around, I will check back in after bed time.

[lauradj]

Ok, I'm back!  Now that I've had a chance to actually look at your EASY, I would suggest you try keeping your LO awake for 1hr 20 mins.  It may not seem like a big difference to you but to a baby it is HUGE!  The fact that she's waking at the 45 minute mark makes me think she's not quite tired enough to link up to the next sleep cycle.
I did notice with both my boys that they went through their short naps phase around this time and it just about killed me.  However they do grow out of it within a couple of weeks.  If that is what is going on, pop her in the stroller or the baby carrier and head out for a walk.  My toddler didn't mind a long walk, as long as he knew the park was waiting at the end.  Honestly though, my DS2 still woke after 30 minutes, regardless of whether I was walking or at home.  Eventually he just started sleeping for longer stretches again.
I hope I've been able to help a bit!

[Mandy.kamal]

Thank you so very much for taking the time to respond! I've been meaning to try W2S but I keep missing the wake up! I think she will do 45 mins and she ends up waking at 30 before I've gone in.

I'm exhausted from trying to get her to connect her naps so I'm stopping for a couple days. I will keep trying for 10 mins or so and then just get her up and wear her

We will try again in a couple weeks! I'll also try the A push too. I've played around with longer abs she still does it but maybe she's ready now

[Mandy.kamal]

Just got home from her 2 month appointment. Her pediatrician said not to worry at all about nap training at this age. She said all babies struggle with combining sleep cycles right now and to just keep her close and hold her to sleep when she can't do it on her own. She said she's way too young to worry about that now.

Have any of you other moms heard this or agree?

[lauradj]

I do! Sounds like your Ped is awesome.  The great thing is, by having her sleep in a carrier or in the stroller, you still get to be outside.

[Haribo2012]

I've totally not attempted sleep training yet, did with DS1 by this age but I want to enjoy a few more cuddles this time round.

I went for a lovely walk in the sunshine today and yesterday which was much more therapeutic than sitting in a room trying to pat for an hour. It will come soon enough x

[MrsAndMama]

I am going through the same thing!!

Question: if we are not nap training at this age, what do we do when they wake up? Will we do an activity? Then will the Activity come before Eating? 

[Mandy.kamal]

You ladies are so lovely! It feels good hearing you all agree. I wouldn't even be attempting sleep training yet either but I need my hands and arms free most of the day for my older one! It's hard to be on the floor playing trucks with a baby strapped to me!

Complete agree on the going outside part!! It's a must in our house to keep everyone sane and to get my 3 year old to sleep nap for me too

Mrs.andMama- So, what I've been doing is attempting the first morning nap. And then just play the rest of the day by ear. When she wakes for the cycle I don't get her up to play. I keep her swaddled and take her down to the room my son and I are in and hold until she's back to sleep and then lay back down. Sometimes I put a thin blanket over her like a hat to sheild the light a bit. Or I put her straight into the carrier and lug her around that way until she falls back asleep until the next feed.

I feel much less discouraged after hearing from you all. I know a lot of moms can get their LO to nap through and STTN at this age but it's nice knowing not everyone can and that's okay too! We aren't ruining our babes just yet by not

[Haribo2012]

I have friends that didn't bother with sleep training until 6 months old and the world didn't end for them lol and 1 friend who walked both her kids every day for naps until 1 year old and they both transitioned fine to naps in cots. I'm not saying that's what I'd do but you know all ways work I guess.
I'm just trying to make sure my DS2 gets sleep and it might not be long naps but at least if I can keep OT at bay the nights seem OK. X

[Julie Kenwell]

Hi guys,

This sounds very much like what I'm going through with my second son right now.
He will be 11 wks in two days. For a while he would have done one good nap of about two hrs and the rest cat naps but now they are all short. 
My first boy was a catnapper. I had always put it down to the fact he wanted to be rocked to sleep! So at four months I started pu/pd to stop the reliance on rocking.
Around five months, his naps started to get better. I remember the very day it all started getting better.
I had put him down for his nap, could hear him stirring at the 45 min mark so headed up to get him just as normal (I never tried to resettle) and couldn't believe it when I went in to find he had gone back over to sleep!
I thought it was all because of the sleep training that he was finally transitioning to another cycle, but maybe he was just ready to do better naps regardless. I'm hoping my second son will be ready to do better naps soon! Its very hard to find time to spend with my first boy when the second is up and down from naps like a yoyo!