Paci Removal?

[ap375]

Where can I go on the forums to research getting rid of the pacifier? My LO is six-months-old and wakes up frequently, needing his pacifier to be put back in his mouth. He also won't fall asleep on his own - he quietly fusses to himself until it goes into a full-blown cry, requiring me to put his pacifier back in before he'll fall asleep. So exhausting! (The fussing generally lasts about five-ten minutes.)

Also, do I need to get rid of the pacifier (since he's so reliant on it) before I can start helping him drop night feedings? And how did Tracy recommend parents drop night feedings? I think I saw brief mentions of gradually reducing the number of ounces fed and/or watering down the milk... Are these actual ways to drop night feedings and if so, would Tracy have recommended them?

Thanks so much to everyone! 

[jessmum46]

Hi there,

This thread might be useful for you:
Taking away the pacifier to help sleep through the night Also you can search the forum using Google or another search engine by using the words 'babywhispererforums' with whatever else you are looking for

Essentially when getting rid of a prop you just need to pick a sleep training method that you are happy with, get rid of the prop (in this case, the paci) and then be consistent with resettling using your chosen technique.  PUPD is one that Tracy would have used for babies of this age - Pick Up/Put Down (PU/PD) - Everything you ever needed to know!. Or there is this which is not one of Tracy's methods but complements her philosophy: Gentle Removal Plan

Night feedings is a different issues I would say as babies may legitimately still need them at this age.  I presume you are bottle feeding?  How many times does your LO feed at night and how much milk does he take in the daytime?  This may help to start with: When can I stop feeding at night?

[ap375]

Thanks so much for your help! And sorry it's taken so long to reply - I've been having problems with mastitis (going on ten months now. Four surgeries, tons of specialists, etc. It's the reason my baby is bottle fed) and I found out I had stress fractures in my foot around the same time I posted. Lots of fun going on here!

So, in answer to your comments. Yes, bottle fed. He's on a special goats milk formula his pediatrician gave us due to severe allergic reactions to ingredients in regular formulas. So, I'm going to assume that the milk digests about as quickly as breast milk, which may be why he wakes up at night still. He also has severe acid reflux and I don't think we'll try PU/PD for that reason. It took us three and a half months to realize just how bad his reflux was, and as a result, he didn't gain a ton of weight, which might be another part of why he still wakes up at night. He's growing nicely now, thank goodness. We're feeding him around 3 in the morning and again around 5:30. He drinks five ounces each time - sometimes more at the 3am feeding. And he's REALLY hungry - cries when he sees his bottle and practically inhales the milk.

I'd like to try the Gentle Removal Plan, but I'm still hesitating. Worrying it won't work, since he's not very consistent in how he falls asleep. Sometimes, he puts himself asleep, other times, he won't fall asleep unless we go in and give hims pacifier again. Will the Gentle Removal Plan still work in these instances? I think we'll start working on it tonight. Can I use my method of pat-shush during the process?

Oh, and in case this changes anything, he's strictly a stomach sleeper due to constantly aspirating from his reflux.

[ap375]

Okay, I just went through the plan in the first link with a fine-toothed comb and I have a bunch of questions for you or for anyone who would like to respond. (Will go on to read the other links in a bit.)

1. Because my baby is a tummy-only sleeper, he tends to arch his back a TON when he's not happy with his sleep situation. How do I do the Gentle Removal Plan when he's arching? Especially the holding his mouth shut part.

2. He's six months old now and doesn't really root anymore. Does the plan change based on his age?

3. The instructions say that when the baby doesn't resist and is nearly out, to put the baby back in bed. And the note about Betsy with her baby who won't let her keep her mouth closed, do I pick him up and rub his back? I ask because my LO sleeps in his crib and falls asleep there. How do I modify?

4. How do I determine if he's a good napper or not? He takes naps, but requires me going in and putting in his pacifier most of the time to fall asleep.

5. About doing it at night, how does the baby know the difference between nighttime sleeping and daytime sleeping? When we first started sleep training him (ie - getting him to sleep in his crip instead of in our arms), we weren't able to separate day and night sleeping - we had to do it consistently for every sleep period.

6. It says, "The most important time to use the Pantley’s Gentle Removal Plan is the first falling asleep of the night." But at the beginning, it says, "When your baby wakes, go ahead and pop his pacifier into his mouth." So, do I start at the very first going to sleep period, before he's fallen asleep for the night, or do I wait until he wakes up first, which is usually at 11pm?

7. Will we eventually get to the point where we can lay him in his crib without his pacifier and he'll go to sleep on his own? Needing some reassurance here!

Sorry for all the questions! And thanks so so so much for helping out!

[ap375]

Sorry I'm posting again - three times in a row! I tried the GRP tonight with his pacifier and it didn't go well. He's not used to having anyone in his room when he's falling asleep (we go in quickly to give him his pacifier back and then leave immediately and he falls asleep on his own that way) and the minute he realized I was there, he wanted to play. It took thirty minutes to get him to wind down again. When he had, I started from the top with the GRP and gently removed the pacifier, and yet again, he wanted to play. Started cooing at me, rolled over, grabbed his feet. I again got him calmed down, then tried again. Instead of playing this time, he got really upset and also started to show signs of hunger. We ended up getting him out of bed, fed him again, went through his nightly routine, and laid him down. He fell asleep immediately this time around, but again, with his pacifier. All of it took about an hour and a half.

Not sure what to do now. I don't want to go backwards - it took us a long time to wean him from needing to be held the whole time while he slept, to needing me standing right next to him, and now to him falling asleep without help from us. Yes, we used the pacifier as a prop while helping him accept his crib.

I did notice while in there with him that most of the time, he was able to get the pacifier turned around right and back in his mouth. I'm not sure how much that will help us when he still wakes up so frequently at night.

What to do now?

[jessmum46]

Oh nightmare about the mastitis!  And reflux.....And your foot too!  I'm so sorry you've had such a rough time

Before I go further - is he now fully comfortable from the reflux perspective?  It's obviously essential to rule out discomfort as a cause of night wakings before considering other ideas.  I'm just wondering though.....often for bad refluxers the paci can be a complete lifesaver, many mums here would suggest not to wean it actually so I'm wondering if that may not be the best way forwards for you? 

If he can get his paci himself and replug it, you'd be better off encouraging that I would think.  Why not scatter a few of them around in his crib so he can always grab one?  You can attach one to a lovey or I believe there are some glow in the dark ones too!  If it's the paci that he's waking for then if he can replug he should be able to do that without needing to call for you.  That might lead you towards looking for another reason for him to be waking??